High Functioning Autism

[aspie2x]

I am wondering if there are others out there who have a child with high functioning Autism. There appears to be alot of informaiton out the on Autism, and also on ASpergers but not as much about High Functioning Autism. I know there are alot of similarities but with High Functioning compared to Apergers there is a difference between speech delay and language and also a lower IQ. However there IQ is not as low as an Autistic child. So to try and use techniques that you would with a child having Aspergers my child doenst understand.
Sometimes its difficult to know what he does and does not understand. Anyone else found this?

 

[kayd1966]

My 4 year old son has HFA, he is speech delayed but academically at a grade 1 level. His speech causes him a lot of frustration but he's in speech therapy that helps his communicate with us.

I do a lot of comparing between him and our daughter (she's 17 months younger) because they are at the same level socially and with speech, however she is starting to have a better command of the everyday use of language. She uses filler words in her sentences that he still mumbles through. Sometimes he won't understand what we are asking him to do so we have to simplify the sentence. We also use pictures to assist him in grasping the concept of what's being said.

Most Aspergers aproaches work with my son as long as I adapt the speech to correspond with his level of comprehension.

Hope that helps

 

[aspie2x]

That is useful, thankyou. The problem I have is because he is quite behind in his comprehension and behaviour. He is more like 6 then 10 and yet talks more like 8 and it is so unbalanced that we find it tricky to know really what his level is at.

 

[Kathleen111]

I am wondering if there are others out there who have a child with high functioning Autism. There appears to be alot of informaiton out the on Autism, and also on ASpergers but not as much about High Functioning Autism. I know there are alot of similarities but with High Functioning compared to Apergers there is a difference between speech delay and language and also a lower IQ. However there IQ is not as low as an Autistic child. So to try and use techniques that you would with a child having Aspergers my child doenst understand.
Sometimes its difficult to know what he does and does not understand. Anyone else found this?

I'm HFA. Lower IQ? HFA/AS/LFA are all on a spectrum so each can be at a different point. Intelligence, personality, etc...are all different.

My Mom used to play records and the radio, to practice singing along to help with the speech delay. Dancing to help with spatial tripping over air difficulty. My Mom DID NOT enroll me in chorus or dance school where'd I'd a died from social difficulty. We just did that at home, and I always had records, radio, and enough floor space in my room. HFAs can absorb a lot, trying to express it is a whole other matter. HFAs are the ones we hear about moving along the spectrum too, like from LFA to HFA. Seeming to be "cured" but we're not.

My parents were thrilled about enrolling me in regular school when I got "better." My speech and spatial improvement had a lot to do with my Mom, not the autistic school. As far as social activity, I would have preferred to stay with other auties, the normies were mean to me. I was placed in the gifted class so no offense but I understand mathematics better than most people. That was something again my MOM noticed and encouraged with advanced books and encylopedias in mathematics and science. No, I didn't like those cartoon books. What I called "real books." I liked text books. I really hated it when teachers would take credit and make me do things like school plays, which my Mom fought, and lost, so I projectile vomited all over the 1st to 3rd rows, until I mercifully passed out.

That's the long way of saying don't underestimate yourself and don't give other people more say than you have over your child.

 

[Kathleen111]

That is useful, thankyou. The problem I have is because he is quite behind in his comprehension and behaviour. He is more like 6 then 10 and yet talks more like 8 and it is so unbalanced that we find it tricky to know really what his level is at.

You can't go by the written, verbal, and social skills of an HFA. Mine stunk. There again my Mom found the things I could do, and I didn't feel like such a delay. I was in college when two wonderful things happened. I learned how to write and it is ok to be weird. I had the same communications teacher for five years and spent an extra year in undergraduate, just to practice it. It finally went off in my head. HFAs usually prefer informal speech, and writing. Essentially shrinking down too much information to something compact. What we "get" we get it extremely well and what we don't get we don't "get" extremely awful too. What the teacher did was show me how to expand, instead of shrink everything down. Which shrinking is a great way to cram for exams. I was a good multiple choice test taker. Aspies usually not always are the formal, stick to the grammar rules, writers and talkers, so it appears as more mature/advanced. HFAs are think outside the box, and how long do I have to stand here doing the things I despise which is talking and writing. The shortest distance between two points, and it doesn't mean he is immature.

He might like the computer. That's what I found to keep me writing everyday which I promised my college professor I would do, to prevent from getting rusty, although I will never be Edgar Allen Poe or something.

 

[kayd1966]

Kathleen111...thank you for sharing...come and 'practice' your writing here anytime. You can teach me more than any professional with all their books & degrees.

Hats off to your Mom for standing up for you and supporting you...there are some amazing Moms out there, and it sounds like your Mom is one of them!

I know my son is HFA and very smart...he's 4 right now and I can see so much potencial so hearing your story is a real encouragement...thank you.

 

[Kathleen111]

Thank you ((((((((KayD))))))))) *hugs*

My Mom seemed to get bullied by teachers and experts as much as I did students and experts. I get annoyed with the homeschool, autistic schooling, and mainstreaming debate, because that has a lot to do with personality. There are only two types of personalities that do well in schools or institutions, which has nothing to do with autism. And behavior seems to dictate grades which has nothing to do with autism. The focus of schools seems to be of personality and behavior not autism, and under the guise of autism what type of person and behavior institutions prefer.

Because I happen to have the personality of a doormat and the behavior of the class plant, I did well in school. Nobody except my mother cared that I could not talk or write proficiently until college because I was not a loud, figetdy, pain in the neck. If they like your personality and behavior, they find everything right with you, and if they don't they find everything wrong with you and blame it on autism/parenting/it can't possibly be the institution is unsuitable. Schools today are anti-boy, and have always been anti-five other personalities, and anyone who is not a plant in behavior.

I absolutely hated school and could not voice opposition to abhorrent child abuse of those five other personalities and behaviors. The teachers had no right to force me just because it didn't take much to do it into activities abhorrent to autistics with social difficulty. The teachers should not have given me grades based on behavior not ability. That gave my mother the false impression that I didn't need extra help in writing, and I didn't know how to say that I did. She actually trusted these teachers to know what is best for me more than she did. It's a good thing she didn't always or I wouldn't be able to talk.

 

[kayd1966]

you are reminding me to keep a very close eye on my son...thankfully he's only 4 and there isn't too much water under the bridge.

Do you mind me asking how old you are?

I've found that some teachers do not like parents who aer educated in their child's diagnoses or needs...something I'm running into now...I'm trying to be as educated as possible about my son...some like and some make it very clear that I'm not looking at things clearly because I don't have their level of education...I just keep reminding myself that I am getting a degree in 'James' not some other school subject.

 

[Kathleen111]

Nobody believes it, but I'll be 41 next month. Auties look a lot younger. I have two normie kids and the teachers don't mess with me. Revenge of the nerds.

 

[kayd1966]

Nobody believes it, but I'll be 41 next month. Auties look a lot younger. I have two normie kids and the teachers don't mess with me. Revenge of the nerds.

Good for you! Nobody believe how old I am either...I got guessed at 27 a couple of weeks ago... ...made me laugh and feel good at the same time.

 

[Kathleen111]

Hi KayD,

That's what I'm wondering if you have shadow AS/HFA, because you seem to understand us a little too well Each child is a unique human being and you seem to know where the autism ends and he begins. Teachers will try to be experts on autism, because they read a book about it in school. I listened to them yammer about me like I was a patient. Autistics know each other. Nothing undermines it takes one to know one.

You should hear my kids who have been raised by an autistic translate. Hey, teacher, my Mom isn't saying anything not because she does't understand you but because she is so honest she is hesitant to tell you that you don't know what and especially who you are talking about.

 

[Kathleen111]

I've had to come in and give talks with the kids about Autism in my kids' classrooms because these teachers don't have a clue and give misinformation to my kids about who and what I am. Living with Autism is not the same thing as reading about it.

You know what really sticks in my craw is that females with Autism are often disregarded because of our looks which are similiar to the males yet socially desirable, where the boys although they look the same, are socially undesirable. Marilyn Monroe was as Autistic as Albert Einstein. Same big head, blunt honesty, poor voice control, socially akward, naive, gullible, sensitive, and overly trusting. I am up to the gills with teachers telling my kids about Autism and acting like they are being raised by "The Rainman" which the character is not real and is a SAVANT, not an autistic. I despise that misinformation movie, and the real Autistics are overlooked.

 

[kayd1966]

I went to see that movie in the theater and walked out cause I couldn't stand it!

As I look back at my life, God always placed a soft spot in my heart for people with autism...I started as a volunteer when I was in grade 8 during the summer with some children that were being intergrated into the summer parks & rec programs. I ended up working for the parks & rec dept still I was done high school working in the intergration program. From there, I worked at a summer camp doing the same thing, then after college, I worked & managed group homes where children with severe/low functioning autism were placed by the governement. I loved my work but left it in 1995 so that I could have time to deal with some stuff in my own life. I met my husband in '98 and were married in '99. 2001 brought James into my life, by then end of 2002 I knew what we were dealing with and started using sign right away, then started the process of early diagnoses and treatment...here we are at the of 2005 and he's a little 4 year old boy with autistic tendencies in the area of speech/communication and some very loud busy social situations. He is an amazing little man...and I know God gave me that soft spot for a reason...He was preparing me for my son.

(I'm actually the other end of the globe from autism...I'm severe ADHD...and I LOVE social settings - I drive my son & (aspie)husband CRAZY but my daughter loves it).

 

[Kathleen111]

You do know ADD/ADHD are on the bottom end of the Autistic Spectrum? Auties LOVE people, a little too much, and get taken advantage of, accepted or outsted. It's hard because we know we are different, and we can't fix it. I felt so sorry for the autistic boys and they tried to help me too, because we are so socially brutalized. It's ok to be a quiet, shy, girl. It is so not to be a quiet, shy, boy. Aspies are usually the ones that can talk, very well! I am scared of groups of people. People in groups change and every group has a scapegoat which is usually one of us if we're around, because we won't/can't condone doing that to other people. Man is a social animal and it is a high form of cruelty. We understand when they don't like us because we can't do those things. We're altruists and we can't violate that. Even my close friend growing up told me she hates me sometimes because we're too good.

Girls can hide it a lot better just with the social rules that work for the girls, work against the boys. Girls in ones and twosies are ok. Boys, whatever that is, form groups, scarey groups, of hierarchies and test each other for domination. Aspies and auties won't play mean games where someone will get hurt. Basically if he don't go along with it, he's volunteering to be the one that gets hurt. I can cry too, where boys have to hide pain and we can't. Nothing is hidden about autie girls or boys.

You knew you were going to have a son We're all elfish that way.

 

[itsgood]

as far as I know Asperger's and high-functioning autism are the same thing

 

[kayd1966]

the main difference between the two has to do with speech and communication. To get an AS diagnosis, there can not be any language or communication delay. HFA has the communication / language delay.

My son is HFA because he is 4 years old now and has speech and comprehension of about a 2 year old...however, he is very intellectual and most of his behavior problems is related to his desire but inability to communicate.

 

[Kathleen111]

KayD,

I can sure relate to that. It's difficult not to be able to express yourself in a way other people understand. Two HFAs can understand each other without saying a word. It's like we have our own language. English is not a first language for us and it is like learning a foreign language for us.

And I hope I'm not going too far but the world is a very scary place for us. We know we are not understood and we know people don't like us. It doesn't get any better either with learning the language. This world is extremely hostile to anyone who is different and we know we are different and we know it is hostile communication.

 

[itsgood]

yes I feel like that too only I have Asperger's

 

[Kathleen111]

Hi itsgood,

The only difference between AS and HFA is that HFA has the speech delay. I'm comfortable around all autistics, including Low Functioning or Kanner's. It's hard to be around normies all the time.

 

[Bethshaya]

you are reminding me to keep a very close eye on my son...thankfully he's only 4 and there isn't too much water under the bridge.

Do you mind me asking how old you are?

I've found that some teachers do not like parents who aer educated in their child's diagnoses or needs...something I'm running into now...I'm trying to be as educated as possible about my son...some like and some make it very clear that I'm not looking at things clearly because I don't have their level of education...I just keep reminding myself that I am getting a degree in 'James' not some other school subject.

As a mom with a child with Pervasive Development Disorder (PDD) do not ever feel like they know better. They dont. You are the only one who will be the one to advocate for your child. You know him best.

I have been very fortunate in that my sons school I have felt, until last year, was on his side. His TA in elementary school was fantasic and ended up being his "mom away from mom". When he moved to middle school, she transferred her knowledge to his new aide and the new aide promptly threw it all away because she knew best. Consequently, everything went downhill from there. It wasnt until the PPT that they called the old teacher back and she told them what works and doesnt with him. They decided they didnt have the capacity for the services he needed and transferred him to a "special school". Well, they hired a specialist to "review" my son and recommend a course of action. Little did we know that this "specialist" used to be the head of the school she recommended. Big mistake looking back.

The school did not know how to hand a child on the spectrum and specialized in children with "behavior" problems. They also took kids who were displaced from their own schools while they were patients at the rehab which was also part of the facility. He ended up being the youngest student there at age 11. The rest of the kids were in high school. Big trouble.

My son learned more in the few months he was there...and it wasnt what we wanted him to learn. His vocabulary increased, but all with swear words. He came home being bullied. When I called one day to speak to the teacher about something at school and inquired how he was doing, they informed me he has been in the library for every class except two for weeks. But he would come into the classroom between periods to get the assignment. When I asked why, they said they never asked. I went ballistic. You have a child who has a sudden behavior change and you dont ask? He obviously wasnt attempting to skip the work because he would come in between to get it so he wouldnt fall behind. It never occured to her to ask what was behind him not wanting to go into class?

After he got home, I asked him what was going on. He was getting bullied by one of the high school kids who was in that classroom. He didnt want to go into the class because he was afraid of him. That was a Thursday. By Monday, he was in a new school.

The new school is a school which is specifically for kids on the autism spectrum. He loves it! He gets straight A's and is really coming out of his shell. The teachers listen and know exactly what is going on with him. He is now getting therapy for motor skills and speech. He has opportunities that he never had before with the new school and is thriving.

You know your kids. It was a huge flag when he wouldnt go into class, but was coming to get his work. Actually, it wasnt only a mother that could have spotted that. Anyone who was paying attention would have. There were only 25 kids in the entire school, how they could have missed it amazes me. For $10,000 a year, they should have been more attentive.

I am the only advocate I can trust for my child. I know what works, what doesnt work and can decide if services offered are best for my child or not. This opened my eyes. The experts arent always the experts. Sometimes, they just want to get to the end of the day and collect their paycheck with as minimal work as possible.

So now when I come across a teacher who doesnt like me because I am more educated on my childs condition. I say tough poopers! He is my responsibility. I better darn well know what is going on with him better than you do.