Hi. My Name is......

formykidsiwill · Aug 29, 2006

Hi! I'm glad the weekend went well for you Wendy. I hope everything goes okay going back to work, I'm sure it will. I suspect it will be a relief. For me it would be. I haven't went back since I had my baby, but I'm getting ready. I really need to keep myself busy, or I get in trouble. I tend to get depressed if I'm not doing something that can produce immediate results.

Well, take care everyone...

justanobserver · Aug 29, 2006

formykidsiwill said:
Hi! I'm glad the weekend went well for you Wendy. I hope everything goes okay going back to work, I'm sure it will. I suspect it will be a relief. For me it would be. I haven't went back since I had my baby, but I'm getting ready. I really need to keep myself busy, or I get in trouble. I tend to get depressed if I'm not doing something that can produce immediate results.

Well, take care everyone...

So how are you doin anyways???????

formykidsiwill · Aug 30, 2006

justanobserver said:
So how are you doin anyways???????

Well, I have been better. Since I had the baby (July 10th) I haven't really been going to meetings like i was; and I haven't really been talking to my 'sponsor' or anyone about what's going through my mind (which is dangerous ) I had a C-section, so they gave me some pain pills. I have gotten dependant on the pain pills to 'feel good' and I DREAD running out. Knowing me, I will lose it.

I finally told someone yesterday about the pills. I feel better. I felt like i was 'hiding' something and for me that is dangerous. I HAVE to be open about everything or it will cause me to use again.

SO, that's how I'm doing, thank you for asking.
How are you?

Be Blessed,

PrairieGurl · Aug 30, 2006

formykidsiwill said:
Well, I have been better. I haven't really been going to meetings like i was; and I haven't really been talking to my 'sponsor' or anyone about what's going through my mind (which is dangerous )

This is my 'story' too My goal today is to call my sponsor...I hope to go to my home group tonite. I don't know if that will happen as I took the wrong meds this am ... the ones that put me to and I have to work my 2nd shift this am (8am till noon) 2nd shift in 5 months ing the meds won't affect me till after my shift!

,
Wendy

formykidsiwill · Aug 30, 2006

WantToBe said:
This is my 'story' too My goal today is to call my sponsor...I hope to go to my home group tonite. I don't know if that will happen as I took the wrong meds this am ... the ones t(at put me to and I have to work my 2nd shift this am (xam till noon) 2nd shift in 5 months ing the meds won't affect me till after my shift!

,
Wendy

Hey.. I find the longer i let it go the harder it is....

Thanks for sharing Wendy, and try to stay awake...lol.....

justanobserver · Aug 30, 2006

formykidsiwill said:
Well, I have been better. Since I had the baby (July 10th) I haven't really been going to meetings like i was; and I haven't really been talking to my 'sponsor' or anyone about what's going through my mind (which is dangerous ) I had a C-section, so they gave me some pain pills. I have gotten dependant on the pain pills to 'feel good' and I DREAD running out. Knowing me, I will lose it.

I finally told someone yesterday about the pills. I feel better. I felt like i was 'hiding' something and for me that is dangerous. I HAVE to be open about everything or it will cause me to use again.

SO, that's how I'm doing, thank you for asking.
How are you?

Be Blessed,

You will be in my thoughts! Are you working on what to do about the dependancy? Have you talked to a doctor about it? You already know what you need to to do but I will say it: please call your sponsor and go to a meeting and share (if for you that helps)!

I wish you the best in strength and wisdom and courage in this. Its the same thing I wish for myself every day! somedays I wish I wished it more for myself than other days! somedays more the wisdom than anything!

justanobserver · Aug 30, 2006

WantToBe said:
This is my 'story' too My goal today is to call my sponsor...I hope to go to my home group tonite. I don't know if that will happen as I took the wrong meds this am ... the ones that put me to and I have to work my 2nd shift this am (8am till noon) 2nd shift in 5 months ing the meds won't affect me till after my shift!

Wendy

oh wow! heres hopin you are able to tough it out tonight!

PrairieGurl · Aug 30, 2006

justanobserver said:
oh wow! heres hopin you are able to tough it out tonight!

Didn't go to AA meeting tonight

Is it normal to want to 'skip' here and there? I just find with my Dad's recovery, going back to work (for, ya know, the first time in 5 months, and the 'demanding' males I live with (including the four legged male ) has just drained me. I don't want these to be excuses cause I'm sure with time...real life will be 'exhausting' on a regular basis Right?

Wendy

formykidsiwill · Aug 31, 2006

justanobserver said:
You will be in my thoughts! Are you working on what to do about the dependancy? Have you talked to a doctor about it? You already know what you need to to do but I will say it: please call your sponsor and go to a meeting and share (if for you that helps)!

I wish you the best in strength and wisdom and courage in this. Its the same thing I wish for myself every day! somedays I wish I wished it more for myself than other days! somedays more the wisdom than anything!

Thank you for your encouragement.

formykidsiwill · Aug 31, 2006

WantToBe said:
Didn't go to AA meeting tonight

Is it normal to want to 'skip' here and there? I just find with my Dad's recovery, going back to work (for, ya know, the first time in 5 months, and the 'demanding' males I live with (including the four legged male ) has just drained me. I don't want these to be excuses cause I'm sure with time...real life will be 'exhausting' on a regular basis Right?

Wendy

It's normal for me to want to. I MAKE myself go to ATLEAST 2 a week. (I was going to 5 or more) but like I said if I miss it gets easier and easier to miss. I don't think it's a good idea, because this disease is cunning, baffling, and powerful. You (imo) could get in trouble if you get away from AA. (I speak from personal experience) ofcourse, I would tell myself this too, that's why I'm offering advice. OBVIOUSLY, I don't work a perfect program. I would hate for you to get in to trouble though.

Be Blessed,

justanobserver · Sep 1, 2006

WantToBe said:
Didn't go to AA meeting tonight

Is it normal to want to 'skip' here and there? I just find with my Dad's recovery, going back to work (for, ya know, the first time in 5 months, and the 'demanding' males I live with (including the four legged male) has just drained me. I don't want these to be excuses cause I'm sure with time...real life will be 'exhausting' on a regular basis Right?

Wendy

I find that when I DONT want to go or call or do what I know I need to do, thats when I am at risk of getting in trouble and is the best time for me to force msyelf to go. Trust me - I can be very persuasive with myself as to why I dont need to go....

formykidsiwill · Sep 2, 2006

Blessings to all,

PrairieGurl · Sep 2, 2006

formykidsiwill said:
It's normal for me to want to. I MAKE myself go to ATLEAST 2 a week. (I was going to 5 or more) but like I said if I miss it gets easier and easier to miss. I don't think it's a good idea, because this disease is cunning, baffling, and powerful. You (imo) could get in trouble if you get away from AA. (I speak from personal experience) ofcourse, I would tell myself this too, that's why I'm offering advice. OBVIOUSLY, I don't work a perfect program. I would hate for you to get in to trouble though.

Be Blessed,

You're right...the more I miss, the easier it is to miss the next one. I guess with the way I've been feeling lately, I should realize the 'old patterns' returning
I know my husband has been counting the days I've missed. I don't know what else to say, except thanks for your advice and I MUST make it my goal to attend tonight! Thanks for caring.
Wendy

PrairieGurl · Sep 2, 2006

justanobserver said:
I find that when I DONT want to go or call or do what I know I need to do, thats when I am at risk of getting in trouble and is the best time for me to force msyelf to go. Trust me - I can be very persuasive with myself as to why I dont need to go....

Hey Norm,

After rereading my post...to be honest...those things really are excuses This whole lieing to myself is the begining of the 'fall' I will have to force myself tonight. I truely am tired...

With all this ing so early in the am...I may just pass out

Wendy

justanobserver · Sep 2, 2006

WantToBe said:
Hey Norm,

After rereading my post...to be honest...those things really are excuses This whole lieing to myself is the begining of the 'fall' I will have to force myself tonight. I truely am tired...

With all this ing so early in the am...I may just pass out

Wendy

ya know, do what you want to do but if I might suggest you take in consideration that you are going thru a MAJOR life change right now. Mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, psycologically (big word for me to spell) with your body and mind trying to adapt to a life without the alcohol affecting it. It took me several monthsw for the body to physically be strong enough to where i wasnt tired all day long and run down.

take naps! give yourself some down time! tell others this is your time and you aint gonna be bothered. relax, unwind. and do sowith your mind and spirit. stress will wear you out and cause you to think of how to "releive" iot as well.

just some thoughts from what I went thru when I was first getting sober.

Oh, and remember, your mind with the antics of your system wanting the alcohol will play games with itself and whisper oh so sweetly in your ear every stinkin reason the book (and might just make up some new ones) to why go and get drunk.

formykidsiwill · Sep 3, 2006

WantToBe said:
You're right...the more I miss, the easier it is to miss the next one. I guess with the way I've been feeling lately, I should realize the 'old patterns' returning
I know my husband has been counting the days I've missed. I don't know what else to say, except thanks for your advice and I MUST make it my goal to attend tonight! Thanks for caring.
Wendy

Hi Wendy

I'm sorry that I can't be there to give you a real hug, the little smilie will have to do. It is so hard isn't it. I know, I trudge this road too. What's on my heart right now is if you fall, just get right back up. You know, it is ok not to be perfect. The difference between failure and success is the successful get back up. I sometimes 'wish' that I could have a life of ease but the truth is no matter what road I could be on the journey is wearisome. No one has it easy. Sometimes we think that life is just too hard and we just can't go on, (I assume you must feel that way too, forgive me if I'm overshooting) but the truth is we have to. We can't continue to look in a bottle for our answers, they simply are not there. Only more problems. I know in time (i'm still new too) this won't be as difficult. I see so many who have years of sobriety and they still struggle with life's issues but not like at first. Over time the issues change and aren't so overwhelming. IT DOES GET BETTER, hang in there girl. I know you'll make it. Don't beat yourself up either, that is dangerous. I suggest talking to someone about how you feel about yourself and what's going on. Someone who understands (another alcoholic perferabbly)and that helps. Just know your in my thoughts, and prayers, and I love you.

Blessings,

PrairieGurl · Sep 3, 2006

formykidsiwill said:
Hi Wendy

I'm sorry that I can't be there to give you a real hug, the little smilie will have to do. It is so hard isn't it. I know, I trudge this road too. What's on my heart right now is if you fall, just get right back up. You know, it is ok not to be perfect. The difference between failure and success is the successful get back up. I sometimes 'wish' that I could have a life of ease but the truth is no matter what road I could be on the journey is wearisome. No one has it easy. Sometimes we think that life is just too hard and we just can't go on, (I assume you must feel that way too, forgive me if I'm overshooting) but the truth is we have to. We can't continue to look in a bottle for our answers, they simply are not there. Only more problems. I know in time (i'm still new too) this won't be as difficult. I see so many who have years of sobriety and they still struggle with life's issues but not like at first. Over time the issues change and aren't so overwhelming. IT DOES GET BETTER, hang in there girl. I know you'll make it. Don't beat yourself up either, that is dangerous. I suggest talking to someone about how you feel about yourself and what's going on. Someone who understands (another alcoholic perferabbly)and that helps. Just know your in my thoughts, and prayers, and I love you.

Blessings,

Thank you, the little smilie warmed my heart.
What you shared is so true and encourageing. There really is hope!

Falling...yesterday...mid afternoon, I went with my Sis-in-Law for a drive in the country (which was grand with the windows down, letting the wind blow thru our hair and smelling the freshness of country air) we went to a new Golf Course for a late lunch. The waitress asked if we wanted anything to drink besides water, I asked what the house wine was...Sis looked at me and said "Are you sure"? and we both ordered a glass. It tasted so good, had a lovely lunch and decided to have a Bailyes with my coffee

Shortly after my stomache started to ache, a headache surfaced and I felt ... I came right home as I did not want to face anyone, then in bed I started sweating I felt very and guilty this am, I didn't check your post out right away...I asked the Lord to forgive me, and I know I have to forgive myself. Then here I find your post...'don't beat yourself' Difficult, but not impossible.

Thanks for your love and support and especially your prayer.
Wendy

PrairieGurl · Sep 4, 2006

As two very wise men have said on this thread before... pick yourself up, dust off and go on. (or something to that effect)
So that is what I shall do!
Holiday Monday, what to do? Find a meeting to attend? Should be a priority for this gal.

Wendy
Who's it's one day at a time, and the past is, well, the PAST!

formykidsiwill · Sep 4, 2006

Hi Wendy. That IS all you can do. Get right back up. I admire you for being honest about it, imo, that's the only way to beat this thing. I hope the day goes well for you, and I hope your able to make a meeting.
Lots of Love,

PrairieGurl · Sep 4, 2006

formykidsiwill said:
Hi Wendy. That IS all you can do. Get right back up. I admire you for being honest about it, imo, that's the only way to beat this thing. I hope the day goes well for you, and I hope your able to make a meeting.
Lots of Love,

Hi

Thank you my Friend!

Yes, as hard as it is sometimes...HONESTY is the ONLY way to go!

With a Grateful Heart & s & s,
Wendy

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