-
Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.
-
CF has always been a site that welcomes people from different backgrounds and beliefs to participate in discussion and even debate. That is the nature of its ministry. In view of recent events emotions are running very high. We need to remind people of some basic principles in debating on this site. We need to be civil when we express differences in opinion. No personal attacks. Avoid you, your statements. Don't characterize an entire political party with comparisons to Fascism or Communism or other extreme movements that committed atrocities. CF is not the place for broad brush or blanket statements about groups and political parties. Put the broad brushes and blankets away when you come to CF, better yet, put them in the incinerator. Debate had no place for them. We need to remember that people that commit acts of violence represent themselves or a small extreme faction.
Help me improve my OkCupid profile.
- Thread starter CCHIPSS
- Start date
Moonrise Lu
Newbie
- Jul 23, 2014
- 149
- 42
- Country
- United States
- Gender
- Female
- Faith
- Non-Denom
- Marital Status
- Married
Hi CCHIPSS!
I think the others are right, you might have mentioned your Christian-ness a little too much, haha. You should definitely include it on there, since it is important to you and shows you are only interested in finding a relationship with someone who shares your faith! This will make you more eye-catching to a woman who is looking for a Christian man, and might deter some types of people you wouldn't want to date.
I feel like your 2nd and 3rd paragraphs are a bit... unnecessary? By that point I feel you should be talking yourself up and describing yourself, not just preaching. But I think adding a "Favorite Scriptures" section somewhere would be good, so you could show off your favorite verses. (at the bottom you seem to have some)
I suggest putting the "What I'm doing with my life" up a little higher. Also just a paragraph describing your personality (it helps to think of how your friends would describe you). You need to show off a little of who you are, not just what you do. I think it's better to put those things before your favorites and other trivia about yourself.
Perhaps set it up like this.
1. First paragraph saying you're looking for a Christian relationship
2. Your personality (are you funny? shy? adventurous? etc)
3. What you do
4. I'm Really Good At
5. Favorites/Places Traveled/other trivia
Also be more specific in your favorites! Putting a specific book or movie will show more of you than just the genre. I don't think you need to include the "As for Godly things" in your "things you couldn't live without". Also the "thinking about" section, you don't need the "every day, every breathe....trust God for our work." Maybe also the last couple paragraphs at the bottom could go. These parts just sound a bit preachy rather than helping someone get to know you. You don't need to save someone or fix their actions in love through your profile, lol, just show who you are so someone can become interested to contact you.
lol sorry that was long, just wanted to be specific and explain why I thought needed change.
I think the others are right, you might have mentioned your Christian-ness a little too much, haha. You should definitely include it on there, since it is important to you and shows you are only interested in finding a relationship with someone who shares your faith! This will make you more eye-catching to a woman who is looking for a Christian man, and might deter some types of people you wouldn't want to date.
I feel like your 2nd and 3rd paragraphs are a bit... unnecessary? By that point I feel you should be talking yourself up and describing yourself, not just preaching. But I think adding a "Favorite Scriptures" section somewhere would be good, so you could show off your favorite verses. (at the bottom you seem to have some)
I suggest putting the "What I'm doing with my life" up a little higher. Also just a paragraph describing your personality (it helps to think of how your friends would describe you). You need to show off a little of who you are, not just what you do. I think it's better to put those things before your favorites and other trivia about yourself.
Perhaps set it up like this.
1. First paragraph saying you're looking for a Christian relationship
2. Your personality (are you funny? shy? adventurous? etc)
3. What you do
4. I'm Really Good At
5. Favorites/Places Traveled/other trivia
Also be more specific in your favorites! Putting a specific book or movie will show more of you than just the genre. I don't think you need to include the "As for Godly things" in your "things you couldn't live without". Also the "thinking about" section, you don't need the "every day, every breathe....trust God for our work." Maybe also the last couple paragraphs at the bottom could go. These parts just sound a bit preachy rather than helping someone get to know you. You don't need to save someone or fix their actions in love through your profile, lol, just show who you are so someone can become interested to contact you.
lol sorry that was long, just wanted to be specific and explain why I thought needed change.
Upvote
0
Moonrise Lu
Newbie
- Jul 23, 2014
- 149
- 42
- Country
- United States
- Gender
- Female
- Faith
- Non-Denom
- Marital Status
- Married
Also, some people are saying to stay away from the website altogether cause of bad experiences. But I think it's worth a shot!
Every dating website you go on will have its share of creeps, psychos, jerks, and people who make you say "aw heck no!". I actually met my boyfriend on ChristianMingle.com (which I think would be a good option for you to try, since it is a website more obviously for people looking for faith-based relationships) but before we talked, there were a lot of nooooot great people we both saw/talked to.
Mostly the bad experiences on ChristianMingle had to do with people 2-3 times our age messaging us. (Kinda innappropriate for a 48 year old man to be looking at a 21 year old girl's profile everyday lol, and my boyfriend had plenty of "cougars" scoping his profile.) But I saw some guy's profiles literally saying they just wanted sex. I couldn't believe it! But I think my boyfriend had the worst. A girl our age seemed pretty nice at first so they messaged a bit, but then she revealed she was 2 months pregnant and looking for a man to settle down with the be the father. She was just looking for a new baby daddy! Haha
So yeah, no website is perfect, but it could work out for you on OKCupid! I say just give it a shot for a while, you can always open accounts on different dating websites later, and of course you might meet someone face-to-face instead! Just trust in God to lead you to the person He wants you to be with and look to Him for direction~
---
Oh! I did forget to say in my last post, I think you should put stuff about your personality in your profile, stuff that is important to know about you. I say this because when I was on ChristianMingle, the first thing I put in my description was that I am very shy around new people, but I warm up and get more talkative the more I get to know them. If I didn't put that, my boyfriend and I probably wouldn't be together right now lol. He said, the first time we talked on the phone and met in person, I was too quiet and it made me seem a bit rude, like I was sitting around judging what he was saying. But since he knew I was shy from my profile, he decided to keep talking to me, and eventually got to my less-shy-talkative side. So that's why I think it's important for you to include stuff about your personality! If there's anything like that that could help someone understand you better from the get-go, it'd be good to include it. OR also you could mention these things about yourself when you message and start chatting with someone.
Anyways best of luck to you!
Every dating website you go on will have its share of creeps, psychos, jerks, and people who make you say "aw heck no!". I actually met my boyfriend on ChristianMingle.com (which I think would be a good option for you to try, since it is a website more obviously for people looking for faith-based relationships) but before we talked, there were a lot of nooooot great people we both saw/talked to.
Mostly the bad experiences on ChristianMingle had to do with people 2-3 times our age messaging us. (Kinda innappropriate for a 48 year old man to be looking at a 21 year old girl's profile everyday lol, and my boyfriend had plenty of "cougars" scoping his profile.) But I saw some guy's profiles literally saying they just wanted sex. I couldn't believe it! But I think my boyfriend had the worst. A girl our age seemed pretty nice at first so they messaged a bit, but then she revealed she was 2 months pregnant and looking for a man to settle down with the be the father. She was just looking for a new baby daddy! Haha
So yeah, no website is perfect, but it could work out for you on OKCupid! I say just give it a shot for a while, you can always open accounts on different dating websites later, and of course you might meet someone face-to-face instead! Just trust in God to lead you to the person He wants you to be with and look to Him for direction~
---
Oh! I did forget to say in my last post, I think you should put stuff about your personality in your profile, stuff that is important to know about you. I say this because when I was on ChristianMingle, the first thing I put in my description was that I am very shy around new people, but I warm up and get more talkative the more I get to know them. If I didn't put that, my boyfriend and I probably wouldn't be together right now lol. He said, the first time we talked on the phone and met in person, I was too quiet and it made me seem a bit rude, like I was sitting around judging what he was saying. But since he knew I was shy from my profile, he decided to keep talking to me, and eventually got to my less-shy-talkative side. So that's why I think it's important for you to include stuff about your personality! If there's anything like that that could help someone understand you better from the get-go, it'd be good to include it. OR also you could mention these things about yourself when you message and start chatting with someone.
Anyways best of luck to you!
Last edited:
Upvote
0
wannaberocker
Newbie
No, improve it yourself. The ladies on OKCupid wanna know YOU not everyone from CF.
Upvote
0
I see nothing to "improve" on your public profile if that is you. You've got some pictures up, what you do for a living, what activities you like, your faith and how important it is to you.
Unless you're looking to attract some females to someone who isn't you - don't "improve" your profile.
Unless you're looking to attract some females to someone who isn't you - don't "improve" your profile.
Upvote
0
- Jul 10, 2014
- 1,527
- 497
- Country
- Canada
- Gender
- Male
- Faith
- Protestant
- Marital Status
- Engaged
- Politics
- CA-Liberals
Hi CCHIPSS!
I think the others are right, you might have mentioned your Christian-ness a little too much, haha. You should definitely include it on there, since it is important to you and shows you are only interested in finding a relationship with someone who shares your faith! This will make you more eye-catching to a woman who is looking for a Christian man, and might deter some types of people you wouldn't want to date.
I feel like your 2nd and 3rd paragraphs are a bit... unnecessary? By that point I feel you should be talking yourself up and describing yourself, not just preaching. But I think adding a "Favorite Scriptures" section somewhere would be good, so you could show off your favorite verses. (at the bottom you seem to have some)
I suggest putting the "What I'm doing with my life" up a little higher. Also just a paragraph describing your personality (it helps to think of how your friends would describe you). You need to show off a little of who you are, not just what you do. I think it's better to put those things before your favorites and other trivia about yourself.
Perhaps set it up like this.
1. First paragraph saying you're looking for a Christian relationship
2. Your personality (are you funny? shy? adventurous? etc)
3. What you do
4. I'm Really Good At
5. Favorites/Places Traveled/other trivia
Also be more specific in your favorites! Putting a specific book or movie will show more of you than just the genre. I don't think you need to include the "As for Godly things" in your "things you couldn't live without". Also the "thinking about" section, you don't need the "every day, every breathe....trust God for our work." Maybe also the last couple paragraphs at the bottom could go. These parts just sound a bit preachy rather than helping someone get to know you. You don't need to save someone or fix their actions in love through your profile, lol, just show who you are so someone can become interested to contact you.
lol sorry that was long, just wanted to be specific and explain why I thought needed change.
Thanks Moonrise for your help. I will see what I can improve upon.
I don't think I will remove my faith stuff. Maybe just a bit. I will try to add more personal stuff though.
Upvote
0
- Jul 10, 2014
- 1,527
- 497
- Country
- Canada
- Gender
- Male
- Faith
- Protestant
- Marital Status
- Engaged
- Politics
- CA-Liberals
Hi guys. A little update:
After my break up with my EX, I has been single for almost exactly 6 months. None of the girls I have dated so far are working out, one way or another. I don't think my standards (internal and external) are that high. But some of them just doesn't work for me haha. And I do not work out for some of them too.
And recently the number of ladies replying to my messages online has dropped sharply. I am not sure why. I had recently changed up my profile but it still doesn't work. So I am feeling quite discouraged.
Can you do my a favour?
1) Tell me which profile picture(s) of me are the best ones. Which one(s) are the worst ones?
2) Tell me what do you feel about my profile. Is it too long? Is the content inside good? etc.
Thanks a lot for your help! =)
http://www.okcupid.com/profile/CCCHIPSSS?cf=search_overlay
After my break up with my EX, I has been single for almost exactly 6 months. None of the girls I have dated so far are working out, one way or another. I don't think my standards (internal and external) are that high. But some of them just doesn't work for me haha. And I do not work out for some of them too.
And recently the number of ladies replying to my messages online has dropped sharply. I am not sure why. I had recently changed up my profile but it still doesn't work. So I am feeling quite discouraged.
Can you do my a favour?
1) Tell me which profile picture(s) of me are the best ones. Which one(s) are the worst ones?
2) Tell me what do you feel about my profile. Is it too long? Is the content inside good? etc.
Thanks a lot for your help! =)
http://www.okcupid.com/profile/CCCHIPSSS?cf=search_overlay
Upvote
0
LoveDivine
Well-Known Member
Actually, I think your photos are all pretty decent. They are all clear (some people post really fuzzy pictures or have sunglasses on that obscure their face). You have several photos up in your gallery (I think I counted 8) and that is really good. It gives someone looking at your profile a really good idea of what you look like and what you like to do. I think my favorites were 1, 3, 4, and the last one at the hockey game. I don't think there is anything wrong with your profile. Maybe the intro (first paragraph) is a bit long. I think you could condense it by removing the scenario part. I think the rest of what you wrote would still get your idea across. Even so, I don't see why your profile wouldn't get replies. Maybe just be patient.
Upvote
0
Personally, I'd dump the first part...it sounds like you are lecturing and maybe potentially have some emotional baggage related to bad relationship experiences. It is also difficult to read.
And for the section on what you think about...it makes you sound like you think about yourself a lot, something that I don't get from your posts on CF. And the "hope, joy, and peace" is a good in theory but is very vague in reality. I get the impression that you are a deep thinker based on your posts on CF and yet I might pass over a profile like this as a guy who is a lot of "fluff" and not subsistence.
However, if it is attracting the right kind of women...the kind you are interested in, then maybe don't change it.
And for the section on what you think about...it makes you sound like you think about yourself a lot, something that I don't get from your posts on CF. And the "hope, joy, and peace" is a good in theory but is very vague in reality. I get the impression that you are a deep thinker based on your posts on CF and yet I might pass over a profile like this as a guy who is a lot of "fluff" and not subsistence.
However, if it is attracting the right kind of women...the kind you are interested in, then maybe don't change it.
Upvote
0
As for the profile picture, I'd go with the suit one...to me it shows a man who is confident and professional...and then getting into the other ones, you see how diverse your interests are.
Upvote
0
kittysbecute
Pokémon Master
- Jun 3, 2007
- 9,432
- 3,343
- Country
- United States
- Faith
- Protestant
- Marital Status
- In Relationship
- Politics
- US-Republican
The person a,b,c and questions should probably be removed... It's under "self summary" but it's not even about you. Just telling people they should be willing to make some compromises.
I don't use dating sites but people probably make decisions pretty quick when looking at pages - so the first thing they read is important. Maybe write more about yourself there instead.
I don't use dating sites but people probably make decisions pretty quick when looking at pages - so the first thing they read is important. Maybe write more about yourself there instead.
Upvote
0
ReesePiece23
The Peanut Buttery Member.
Hey, when are you coming to London again? X x x
j/k
On a serious note, all of the photos are good - I wouldn't worry too much there. You're opening statement is a bit odd, and slightly confusing - I'd lose that. Everything else is okay though. I wouldn't personally critique it, because it's you being yourself, and well, I'm lacking the female organs to be applicable.
What I WILL say, is chill out a bit. Dating is meant to be fun, so don't bombard the girls with games of mental gymnastics. Not unless she can match you.
j/k
On a serious note, all of the photos are good - I wouldn't worry too much there. You're opening statement is a bit odd, and slightly confusing - I'd lose that. Everything else is okay though. I wouldn't personally critique it, because it's you being yourself, and well, I'm lacking the female organs to be applicable.
What I WILL say, is chill out a bit. Dating is meant to be fun, so don't bombard the girls with games of mental gymnastics. Not unless she can match you.
Upvote
0
- Jul 10, 2014
- 1,527
- 497
- Country
- Canada
- Gender
- Male
- Faith
- Protestant
- Marital Status
- Engaged
- Politics
- CA-Liberals
Hi guys,
Thanks a lot for the feedback. I have changed my profile picture to suit and tie. I have also changed my self-summary. I want to talk about something fun/interesting instead of jumping right into my information.
Please let me know if you like my new self-summary. =)
Thanks a lot for the feedback. I have changed my profile picture to suit and tie. I have also changed my self-summary. I want to talk about something fun/interesting instead of jumping right into my information.
Please let me know if you like my new self-summary. =)
Upvote
0
Messy
Well-Known Member
You look good!
I'd put something in it what you're looking for.
Now it says:
They’re looking for
I'd not say near me but near the place you live in.
I'd say a woman, not women, and leave single out, that's obvious.
I had for instance: I want to see this country saved and play a part in it and I'm looking for someone with the same goal, I'd add something specific what you are looking for in a woman.
I'd put something in it what you're looking for.
Now it says:
They’re looking for
- Women who like men
- Ages 24–34
- Near me
- Who are single
- For new friends, long-term dating
I'd not say near me but near the place you live in.
I'd say a woman, not women, and leave single out, that's obvious.
I had for instance: I want to see this country saved and play a part in it and I'm looking for someone with the same goal, I'd add something specific what you are looking for in a woman.
Upvote
0
MiniEmu
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I'm not sure you can edit that part of an OKCupid profile, it just sort of automatically pops it up there for the whole world to see. The most you can edit it is to untick boxes or change from a drop down. Not sure there are many options for directly saying what you're looking for, other than weeding it into the other sections
Personally I like your profile, it leaves room for revealing more of your personality following on from the initial message.
Personally I like your profile, it leaves room for revealing more of your personality following on from the initial message.
Upvote
0
- Nov 6, 2014
- 1,931
- 624
- Country
- United States
- Gender
- Male
- Faith
- Non-Denom
- Marital Status
- Engaged
OKC does have a generally younger demographic but I'd invest 5 minutes a day to say you've tried it.
I did meet my best friend there. Now we've been chatting 4 hours a week for 7 months, I know her family, and friends. Might even visit next spring. Crazy and I didn't expect it. So I'd just keep the profile alive, and use your updated profile there for other sites.
I did meet my best friend there. Now we've been chatting 4 hours a week for 7 months, I know her family, and friends. Might even visit next spring. Crazy and I didn't expect it. So I'd just keep the profile alive, and use your updated profile there for other sites.
Upvote
0
Similar threads
