Having a rough time.

[berry2000]

I don't know perhaps I'm misdiagnosed. Bipolar NOS whatever that means. Doesn't that mean that they just don't know what it is but it has bipolar features. Anyways I just a little bit frustrated that every single month I get intense PMS that includes desires to self harm and sui thoughts. I'm safe don't worry about that but should I really have to struggle with this stuff every month. And the depression comes too, and I get overwhelmed, easily frustrated and hyperemotional. It feels like a full on bipolar "episode" but it is so closely related to my menstraul cycle it doesn't seem likely to truly be bipolar. I'm exhausted all the time at the moment and when I'm not I'm hating on myself. And I know for sure this is chemical but geeze oh man it doesn't make it any easier at all.

And I feel downright awful that I'm not more hopeful in God and what he can do and I know I will be again when it all passes. I mean some of you are so full of well...full of God....even in the middle of your struggle...and I just don't feel that way right now. I mean it is okay to be honest with where you are really at right?

 

[goldenviolet]

i feel the same cycles in my life. managing them can be a chore somedays. bless your heart. God bless you. surround yourself with healthy things and just take care of yourself the best you can. give the ups and valleys both to Jesus. you are special, valuable, and loved.

 

[PrairieGurl]

And I feel downright awful that I'm not more hopeful in God and what he can do and I know I will be again when it all passes. I mean some of you are so full of well...full of God....even in the middle of your struggle...and I just don't feel that way right now. I mean it is okay to be honest with where you are really at right?

Dearest Berry,

YES...it IS okay to be honest with where you are really at. Honesty is really the best "policy".

You are still full of God in the midst of your struggles...you just can't "see/feel" it. Jesus promises He will NEVER leave us or forsake us...He knows your heart Berry.

There are many times when I can't see or feel God...He then sends people my way who remind me of what I just shared with you.

You do have hope Berry, like you said you know when "what your going thru passes" you will sense His hope again.

Lord please reach down and wrap your loving arms around Berry. May she feel Your presence and rest in the assurance that "this too shall pass"

 

[berry2000]

Feeling a touch better today but a tad "racy" like I've just taken 2 or more shots of expresso. And w/ anxiety.

 

[PrairieGurl]

GLAD YOU'RE FEELING A "TAD" BETTER BERRY

You know...sometimes I wish I could feel like I had "2 shots of expresso" (without the anxiety of course)

's to you

 

[berry2000]

Thanks wantabe helps to know friends are out there and I'm not alone on this crazy rollercoaster.

 

[berry2000]

Yeah things are mellowing out. Turns out my work stress has been reaching a feverish high and I wasn't paying attention. My body was though...not only was the the PMS more intense but I ended up with a urinary tract infection...doctor said it was most likely brought on by stress.

I have to find a way to reduce my stress. Working full time in a very stressful job, mother of two small ones (6, and 4), and extreme financial distress. Don't know how to simplify life for myself. Eventually I think I need a less stressful job and less hours, for my own health and well being...but right now that is impossible. Even my bosses have their eyes on me now because this time last year I had to be hospitalized so (in a kind way) they are trying to make sure I'm not overdoing it. But I've been taking work home every single night just to get caught up....which mean my house is a disaster area. Ah, I'm rambling a bit sorry...sometiems I just need to get it out and on "paper".

I need to simplify things and lower my stress but I don't know how.

 

[gracegetsusthere]

okay - here are some of the things i do to control stress.

I make a schedule of the large tasks every morning and do only those tasks, where possible. The schedule is written.

I make a schedule for household chores. Laundry on Wednesday - Groceries on Thursday, etc. there is more.

This is an advanced technique that REALLY works. Make meal plans for each week. Shop according to the meal plan and prepare each scheduled meal. Amazing how much stress is lost when you don't have to worry about what is for dinner on Monday night!

I make a schedule for checking money and paying bills - about 3 times a month. I use Money.

I am learning to identify when I am feeling overwhelmed.
Write these signals and triggers down as you notice them.

I am learning to politely explain to the pain in the tuckus people in my life that "i am overwhelmed' can we take a time out.

I know what stresses me - find your triggers and write them down. my #1 stressor is noise. I cannot listen to 2 sources of sound at the same time. This will agitate me. I cannot listen to TV often. Especially if it is loud. I don't like lound environments like clubs - which sucks because my husband is a production manager and does live shows at clubs in the city and I have NO interest for a variety of reasons.

Too much religiosity will stress me. I have had to learn to put the bible studies away sometimes and just BE with God. (when i am demanding too much of myself as a student of God)

The evening news will stress me. I do alot of praying during the evening news.

The bottom line is - you have to KNOW YOURSELF. That takes time to do but if you pay attention, you will start to notice the patterns and head them off at the pass.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy helps with distraction activities when you are stressed - just keeps you occupied until you can deal with the situation. It isn't an avoidance of the situation.

UUUGGGH. sometime this illness really stinks.

Love,
Janive