Harmless Porn

[Joachim]

If porn was only pictures of people having consenual sex, there might be a case to be made for it, and I would classify it as erotica.

But porn is not just pictures of people having consenual sex.

It's pictures of women forced to have sex or kinds of sex they do not want. It's pictures of women who are ready and eager for sex with strangers at the drop of the hat. It's picture's of men [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] into women's faces. Porn is pictures of women being treated as animals - tied to the bumper of a car llike a deer, being saddled like a horse, being whipped and being ground up into a meat grinder. It's photos of children being treated in these same ways.

Porn distorts sex.

You do have a point. However, many people actually do engage in such activities willingly. This is not the appropriate location in which to delve into such an issue, but most of the more, off-the-wall things that you see in pornography are things that many couples are actually doing within their own homes, because when you get down to it, a lot of people are incredibly perverse.

 

[The Nihilist]

You do have a point. However, many people actually do engage in such activities willingly. This is not the appropriate location in which to delve into such an issue, but most of the more, off-the-wall things that you see in pornography are things that many couples are actually doing within their own homes, because when you get down to it, a lot of people are incredibly perverse.

Man, don't judge. Some marriages last more than 60 years, missionary probably gets boring.

 

[Hentenza]

Nearly 12 million people suffer from sexual addiction in the United States. Due to the accessibility of sexual material available on the Internet, cable television and videos, these numbers are increasing. Despite common misunderstandings, this addiction is not simply about "too much sex." Sexual addiction is a serious problem in which one engages in persistent and escalating patterns of sexual behavior despite increasing negative consequences to one's self or others. Like other addictions, these behaviors continue despite sincere and persistent efforts to stop. Some might not think sex can be addictive because there are no chemicals involved. However, the body produces many hormones and neurotransmitters during sex that produce the same chemical "high" as drugs or alcohol. Sex addicts, like other addicts, often have a background of abuse (sexual, physical, emotional) and/or neglect, and family histories sprinkled with numerous addictions.
Because of the denial and shame associated with sexual behaviors, it is only recently that the reality of sexual addiction has been acknowledged by those caught in its grasp or by treatment professionals. Since this problem was first addressed in 1983, some have argued that sexual addiction does not exist or is exaggerated. Nevertheless, acknowledgement of compulsive sexuality is growing, and more help is available today than ever before.



http://www.aamft.org/families/Consumer_Updates/Sexual%20Addiction.asp


Porn is not harmless at all. The number of porno addicts continue to increase and marriages continue to be destroyed. You'll can sugar coeated all you want but the numbers don't lie.

 

[Joachim]

Man, don't judge. Some marriages last more than 60 years, missionary probably gets boring.

I never said missionary only. What I am saying is that I had an ex who was well, out there, and so I ended up going along with things that I otherwise would not have. My point only was that there are a lot of well, interesting people out there.

I also think that far too much time is spent by everyone obsessing about sex. For the amount of time that the act actually involves we spend way too much time worrying about it. It's just not the guiding principle of my life. When it is presented as an option then I make my choice but it's not something I dwell on because these days I'm more focused on my education. I just think that people spend far too much time worrying about the subject because there are far more important things.

 

[Joachim]

Nearly 12 million people suffer from sexual addiction in the United States. Due to the accessibility of sexual material available on the Internet, cable television and videos, these numbers are increasing. Despite common misunderstandings, this addiction is not simply about "too much sex." Sexual addiction is a serious problem in which one engages in persistent and escalating patterns of sexual behavior despite increasing negative consequences to one's self or others. Like other addictions, these behaviors continue despite sincere and persistent efforts to stop. Some might not think sex can be addictive because there are no chemicals involved. However, the body produces many hormones and neurotransmitters during sex that produce the same chemical "high" as drugs or alcohol. Sex addicts, like other addicts, often have a background of abuse (sexual, physical, emotional) and/or neglect, and family histories sprinkled with numerous addictions.
Because of the denial and shame associated with sexual behaviors, it is only recently that the reality of sexual addiction has been acknowledged by those caught in its grasp or by treatment professionals. Since this problem was first addressed in 1983, some have argued that sexual addiction does not exist or is exaggerated. Nevertheless, acknowledgement of compulsive sexuality is growing, and more help is available today than ever before.



http://www.aamft.org/families/Consumer_Updates/Sexual%20Addiction.asp


Porn is not harmless at all. The number of porno addicts continue to increase and marriages continue to be destroyed. You'll can sugar coeated all you want but the numbers don't lie.

It's not harmless but, in this country, there is not much you can legally do because the Supremes issued a number of decisions, primarily in the 70's, which protect pornography as a form of freedom of expression. Not even Utah can legally outlaw it though I suspect they restrict the business licenses for it.

Like the murder rate and like the general coarseness of our culture in general, it is the price we pay for living in a country that provides as much freedom as America does.

 

[The Nihilist]

Nearly 12 million people suffer from sexual addiction in the United States. Due to the accessibility of sexual material available on the Internet, cable television and videos, these numbers are increasing. Despite common misunderstandings, this addiction is not simply about "too much sex." Sexual addiction is a serious problem in which one engages in persistent and escalating patterns of sexual behavior despite increasing negative consequences to one's self or others. Like other addictions, these behaviors continue despite sincere and persistent efforts to stop. Some might not think sex can be addictive because there are no chemicals involved. However, the body produces many hormones and neurotransmitters during sex that produce the same chemical "high" as drugs or alcohol. Sex addicts, like other addicts, often have a background of abuse (sexual, physical, emotional) and/or neglect, and family histories sprinkled with numerous addictions.
Because of the denial and shame associated with sexual behaviors, it is only recently that the reality of sexual addiction has been acknowledged by those caught in its grasp or by treatment professionals. Since this problem was first addressed in 1983, some have argued that sexual addiction does not exist or is exaggerated. Nevertheless, acknowledgement of compulsive sexuality is growing, and more help is available today than ever before.



http://www.aamft.org/families/Consumer_Updates/Sexual%20Addiction.asp


Porn is not harmless at all. The number of porno addicts continue to increase and marriages continue to be destroyed. You'll can sugar coeated all you want but the numbers don't lie.

Ok, I've already made the joke about being blind and having hairy palms, so it looks like I may have to take you seriously.
I've always been convinced that sex addiction and porn addiction are nothing more than manufactured crises designed to give the religious right more clout. If you can convince me this is wrong, I'd really appreciate it.

 

[The Nihilist]

I never said missionary only. What I am saying is that I had an ex who was well, out there, and so I ended up going along with things that I otherwise would not have. My point only was that there are a lot of well, interesting people out there.

I also think that far too much time is spent by everyone obsessing about sex. For the amount of time that the act actually involves we spend way too much time worrying about it. It's just not the guiding principle of my life. When it is presented as an option then I make my choice but it's not something I dwell on because these days I'm more focused on my education. I just think that people spend far too much time worrying about the subject because there are far more important things.

No way. Suppose for a minute that men were able to reproduce asexually and never had sex. Where do you think civilization would be? Technology wouldn't have gotten any further than beer, and men would lead short lives sitting around in the mud drinking it. Sometimes they might play football, but that is it. Every major advance of civilization, everything that counts as civilized, was invented to get someone else to do stuff to the inventor's business. It's why people wear nice clothes, it's why they get jobs, it's why they drive nice cars, it's why they work out, it's why they do anything other than drink beer and play xbox. Why do you think married people get fat?

 

[Hentenza]

Ok, I've already made the joke about being blind and having hairy palms, so it looks like I may have to take you seriously.
I've always been convinced that sex addiction and porn addiction are nothing more than manufactured crises designed to give the religious right more clout. If you can convince me this is wrong, I'd really appreciate it.

Did you not read the article that I quoted? Unfortunately I have seen the effects first hand while working volunteer with Lifeway and also with my brother who spend over 2 years in treatment and still has to be careful to avoid the triggers. It is very real, Nihilist. I am not saying this just because I am a Christian.

 

[Hentenza]

No way. Suppose for a minute that men were able to reproduce asexually and never had sex. Where do you think civilization would be? Technology wouldn't have gotten any further than beer, and men would lead short lives sitting around in the mud drinking it. Sometimes they might play football, but that is it. Every major advance of civilization, everything that counts as civilized, was invented to get someone else to do stuff to the inventor's business. It's why people wear nice clothes, it's why they get jobs, it's why they drive nice cars, it's why they work out, it's why they do anything other than drink beer and play xbox. Why do you think married people get fat?

LOL!!! Stereotyping a bit, aren't we?

 

[The Nihilist]

Did you not read the article that I quoted? Unfortunately I have seen the effects first hand while working volunteer with Lifeway and also with my brother who spend over 2 years in treatment and still has to be careful to avoid the triggers. It is very real, Nihilist. I am not saying this just because I am a Christian.

Ok, I've done a bit of research, and I've found that while not made up, it's not in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. If the professionals aren't going to make a call, I lack the hubris to make it for them.

 

[Hentenza]

It's not harmless but, in this country, there is not much you can legally do because the Supremes issued a number of decisions, primarily in the 70's, which protect pornography as a form of freedom of expression. Not even Utah can legally outlaw it though I suspect they restrict the business licenses for it.

Like the murder rate and like the general coarseness of our culture in general, it is the price we pay for living in a country that provides as much freedom as America does.

Yep!! And the highest revenue generator of any industry in the internet. There is a lot of deviant folks out there.

 

[The Nihilist]

LOL!!! Stereotyping a bit, aren't we?

Ok, I think women would still be civilized without sex, but women utterly mystify me.

 

[Hentenza]

Ok, I've done a bit of research, and I've found that while not made up, it's not in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. If the professionals aren't going to make a call, I lack the hubris to make it for them.

The problem is that the onset of the internet in the 90's has exacerbated this problem dramatically. The corporate effects of this addiction have only been felt for less than 10 years, so most long term testing are still on going. The short term testing seems to back up the current numbers being published.

 

[Hentenza]

Ok, I think women would still be civilized without sex, but women utterly mystify me.

You are not alone.

 

[max1120]

Hentenza... Yes sexual addiction does really exist and yes it can like any addiction cause major problems all of those who are affected. Having said that, I (and others some of whom are medical professionals) have stated several times that it the whole "addiction" thing is over blown when it comes to sex. To be a true addiction it has to be something that causes demonstrative harm to them or to othes. Gambling all the time is not harmful...unless their is harm. Things like sex addiction are problematic because it is difficult to say what constitutes an addiction and at what point? At what point does "desire" become "unwanted" and is it "unwanted" for a valid reason or a religious reason? In other words if a person feels drawn looking at porn and thus masturbation and is so bothered by this that he feels extreeme guilt because of his or her religious upbringing this does not constitute sexual addiction. However if the same person is drawn into sexual acts that end up putting them into legal or financal or health problems than that can constitute an addiction. The numbers are over blown in my opinion because of an overly board definition of "sexual addiction".

Max

 

[Joachim]

No way. Suppose for a minute that men were able to reproduce asexually and never had sex. Where do you think civilization would be? Technology wouldn't have gotten any further than beer, and men would lead short lives sitting around in the mud drinking it. Sometimes they might play football, but that is it. Every major advance of civilization, everything that counts as civilized, was invented to get someone else to do stuff to the inventor's business. It's why people wear nice clothes, it's why they get jobs, it's why they drive nice cars, it's why they work out, it's why they do anything other than drink beer and play xbox. Why do you think married people get fat?

You have to understand, my ex may have well, ruined it for me, so to speak. For whatever reason, I put up with it but after a while, I was just taken with how bizarre it was. We broke up for unrelated reasons but I can't say the breakup was detrimental in the least. My motivation isn't well, that thing. It's been success. Sex and children will be an ancillary to it, but my main motivation in life is to be a big shot for the sake of being a big shot. I want to see my name on buildings and in the paper all the time.


Having said that, I will express the opinion that most people simply do obsess about it too much. I wonder if the whole cigarette thing that women do afterwards is real or if it was simply invented by the media and so became real. I could deal with many other things related to the act that I think were more invented by the media and so we all act out the part rather than it being real. I for starters think 85% of it is all fake. Without the release of endorphins, it is nothing more than a bodily function that would feel really really weird. It's an addiction just like someone who drinks too much or someone who is out snorting powder on a daily basis.


I have simply come to view sex in the same vein as I view drinking 15 beers at a kegger. It is simply an act that inspires a sensation and a feeling but in the end that is all it is. If the opportunity presents itself I mean, I will partake because I do believe that it helps to relieve tension, but I don't go out looking for it with this being my specific intent.

 

[Hentenza]

Hentenza... Yes sexual addiction does really exist and yes it can like any addiction cause major problems all of those who are affected. Having said that, I (and others some of whom are medical professionals) have stated several times that it the whole "addiction" thing is over blown when it comes to sex. To be a true addiction it has to be something that causes demonstrative harm to them or to othes. Gambling all the time is not harmful...unless their is harm. Things like sex addiction are problematic because it is difficult to say what constitutes an addiction and at what point? At what point does "desire" become "unwanted" and is it "unwanted" for a valid reason or a religious reason? In other words if a person feels drawn looking at porn and thus masturbation and is so bothered by this that he feels extreeme guilt because of his or her religious upbringing this does not constitute sexual addiction. However if the same person is drawn into sexual acts that end up putting them into legal or financal or health problems than that can constitute an addiction. The numbers are over blown in my opinion because of an overly board definition of "sexual addiction".

Max

But there is harm, Max. I have seen the wrecked marriages, the inability by the addict to stop, the lies, the progressive behavioral change as the addiction develops, the financial impact, the guilt, etc. I actually believe that the numbers are conservative not over blown. This kind of addiction is hard for folks to discuss publicly given the nature of the addiction so there are probably a great many number of unaccounted cases out there. I also believe that the numbers will continue to increase given the widespread and non-hindered availability of pornography.

 

[max1120]

Joachim...I feel sad for you. You look at sex in very depressing light. I mean you could say everything in life is just something to distract you until you die. Nothing has any meaning. I would think that would be a sad way to go through life. You may want to talk to someone about your feelings.

As far as sex is concerned. I love it. I have dated women who got into porn as much as the average frat house. That did not bother me at all. But to each there own.

Max

 

[max1120]

Hentenza... I do not doubt that it does ruin lives in fact I am certain of it. I am just saying that you have a hard time seperating the "real addictions" where people are spending the kids college money on hookers and porn from the couple where they have a problem because he/she really likes porn and the spouse has real problems with them watching porn. Sexual interest are so varied and complicated because they are very personal things. It is no more valid for one spouse to say stop watching porn than it is for the other to say you must watch it with me. Some of these relationships are not salvagable because they involve people with very different attitudes about a very personel asspect of ones life..sex.

Again if the guy is watching porn every moment he can, cutting off family and friends to spend time with his favort porn site...he has an addiction. If he is masturbating 24/7 or doing it in public places where such behaviour is not welcome....he has an addiction. But some people are just mismatched sexually and porn is just a symptom of that problem. A lot of what I hear is people who just have a problem with sex who do not like that their spouse wants more sexually than they are able to offer. This is sad but not something I classify as an addiction.

Max

 

[Oneofthediaspora]

Pff, you know the word for nonconsensual working is slavery, right? I think that undermines your entire argument.

I'm not talking about non-consensual work though am I ?

I'm talking about non-consensual sex.

I take it you see the difference?

Money messes up the consent dynamic. Without full consent there is something wrong with sex.
Paying people to have sex they would rather not have while you watch and w4nk into a tissue, as well as being a trifle sad, is also being complicit in the degradation of the person(s) having sex whilst not really wanting to.