Handling loneliness

[R3quiem]

I feel lonely all the time, for years now. My family is small and scattered, and I don't have much in common with them. I have friends (which I am very thankful for), but they just aren't enough.

I feel like a lot of it is my fault. I'm introverted, and I often pull away from people- not because I don't like them, but because I have nothing in common with them and I'm not very social.

Even at parties I just feel like I'm all alone- anyone have any advice?

I know God is the answer, but I pray every night and go to church- and I'm even lonely at church! I go by myself.

What do you do when you are feeling lonely?

 

[warrrior4him007]

I feel lonely all the time, for years now. My family is small and scattered, and I don't have much in common with them. I have friends (which I am very thankful for), but they just aren't enough.

I feel like a lot of it is my fault. I'm introverted, and I often pull away from people- not because I don't like them, but because I have nothing in common with them and I'm not very social.

Even at parties I just feel like I'm all alone- anyone have any advice?

I know God is the answer, but I pray every night and go to church- and I'm even lonely at church! I go by myself.

What do you do when you are feeling lonely?

welpyournot alone thats what depression is like frist of all and i know how you feel there have been many times in my life i have felt alone i dont do well in groups either i find it very diffcult some suggestions how ever why not volunteer i have found out when i volunteerat church it helps defeet the loneleyness and it brings me closer to ppl

 

[alex872]

Brother,

your problem is not unknown to me.

Do you attend a youth or young adults group at your church on a regular basis?

I was told to firstly focus on my relationship with Jesus. You say you pray every night. However, don't only focus on this issue that much, just seek God.

God bless.

 

[AWorkInProgress]

I feel lonely all the time, for years now. My family is small and scattered, and I don't have much in common with them. I have friends (which I am very thankful for), but they just aren't enough.

I feel like a lot of it is my fault. I'm introverted, and I often pull away from people- not because I don't like them, but because I have nothing in common with them and I'm not very social.

Even at parties I just feel like I'm all alone- anyone have any advice?

I know God is the answer, but I pray every night and go to church- and I'm even lonely at church! I go by myself.

What do you do when you are feeling lonely?

Becareful of loneliness,

From personal experience it is much like quicksand. When you step into it, try hard to get free but instead you sink faster. I wanted someone that was perfect, but that is not humanly possible. Instead much like depression it was a dysfunction and made me not appresiate the friends, relationship with God, or anything in my life.

One day God put a tree branch over me, and I just got so fed up. He reminded me of all the great blessings bestowed on me, and reminded me that I was on journey to become stronger. I used all that as fuel to pull myself out. Really loneliness is discontent. Have to be humble and content with life. Patience helps keep you from unknowingly run into quick sand.

Read for yourself, in the later part of this thread. http://www.christianforums.com/t4752228-loneliness.html&page=4

 

[websuspect]

I have the same problem. The people at church are self absorbed pompous indignant [wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth]s. Its no wonder most people don't goto church. Really I think people do this [wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth] deliberately to push people away from God. I try to go for a walk everyday but I found that just reaching out to some people. That some people are abusive and try to hurt you. Which adds to the problem. Most people with depression do no have a good support network.

 

[cardfan1]

R3quiem,
I know how you feel. I had friends growing up and through college. I remember being out at a party or bar, being surrounded with people, and still feeling completely lonely. like no one can relate.

the most important thing in anyones' life is to have a personal relationship with Christ. Until you have made the decision to follow Jesus, things may prove to be difficult or distorted, - and besides getting through life, the bible teaches that salvation through Jesus is not just the best way to heaven, but the ONLY way.

On top of that, if you aren't getting anything from your church, maybe you should look around. I was raised Catholic, and since have attended Baptist, Methodist, non-denom, etc. I'm not about to get into a denominational discussion here (i've been through them all), but I would strongly suggest finding a church that is Christ-centered and preaches the word of God. I think i've tried about 10-15 different churches in the past couple years across about 4 or 5 different denominations, and only now do i feel like i've finally felt like i've found a place where I can grow and mature as a Christian. As Christians, we need to be spiritually fed.

Finally, you didn't mention if you have depression or not. If you do, depression can play very wierd things on your mind. If you haven't spoken to a professional about this yet and it's persisted for a long time, you might want to find a good Christian counselor. It's quick, they're usually free, and you might find out something that can help.

In the meantime, if you are just lonely, pray and read the bible. Try John chapter 14-16, Philippeans chapt 4, Romans, Corinthians, etc. I know it doesn't always provide instant relief, but sometimes if I make myself read the bible a bit, I usually find a little peace and comfort. Other ideas would be to find things to occupy your mind and excersise your body. Go on a walk, ride a bike, take a drive out in the country, read a book, watch a movie... whatever helps when you're alone. And the other times, try to remain in contact with friends and family.

Anyway, i'm not feeling too great today either, so maybe this doesn't help that much, but for what it's worth, I really hope you feel better. May God bless you.

 

[R3quiem]

R3quiem,
I know how you feel. I had friends growing up and through college. I remember being out at a party or bar, being surrounded with people, and still feeling completely lonely. like no one can relate.

the most important thing in anyones' life is to have a personal relationship with Christ. Until you have made the decision to follow Jesus, things may prove to be difficult or distorted, - and besides getting through life, the bible teaches that salvation through Jesus is not just the best way to heaven, but the ONLY way.

On top of that, if you aren't getting anything from your church, maybe you should look around. I was raised Catholic, and since have attended Baptist, Methodist, non-denom, etc. I'm not about to get into a denominational discussion here (i've been through them all), but I would strongly suggest finding a church that is Christ-centered and preaches the word of God. I think i've tried about 10-15 different churches in the past couple years across about 4 or 5 different denominations, and only now do i feel like i've finally felt like i've found a place where I can grow and mature as a Christian. As Christians, we need to be spiritually fed.

Finally, you didn't mention if you have depression or not. If you do, depression can play very wierd things on your mind. If you haven't spoken to a professional about this yet and it's persisted for a long time, you might want to find a good Christian counselor. It's quick, they're usually free, and you might find out something that can help.

In the meantime, if you are just lonely, pray and read the bible. Try John chapter 14-16, Philippeans chapt 4, Romans, Corinthians, etc. I know it doesn't always provide instant relief, but sometimes if I make myself read the bible a bit, I usually find a little peace and comfort. Other ideas would be to find things to occupy your mind and excersise your body. Go on a walk, ride a bike, take a drive out in the country, read a book, watch a movie... whatever helps when you're alone. And the other times, try to remain in contact with friends and family.

Anyway, i'm not feeling too great today either, so maybe this doesn't help that much, but for what it's worth, I really hope you feel better. May God bless you.

Thanks for the advice, from you and everyone else.

As for what I said, I didn't really mean there was a problem with the church- the people are fine and I have no problem with how they go about things, I just used it as an example. The pastor is really nice too.

As for reading the Bible- I'm in the process of reading the New Testament from beginning to end, I've never read it as a whole book like that before, in order.

And I guess you are right, I probably should talk to a professional. I've never been diagnosed with depression because I've never gone to someone who could, but I've been pretty sure I've had a least moderate depression for like 7-8 years now.

Thanks again for the comments, they were reassuring.

 

[HolyOne87]

I hope you find the right professional for you if you do decide to find someone.
If you ever just want to talk, Feel free to PM me.

*hugs*

 

[BlessedMommy05]

You know, reading your thread has brought back alot of memories of being alone, I mean I went to church alone when I was in my late teens early twenties.. I think I have depression but its not as bad now,but back then it was very hard.. Even my pastor could feel the depression on me and over me, it was difficult to be in church when you feel as though the whole world is falling apart and nothing you do helps.. Having freinds but at the time they used me and just did stuff I cant mention, but even today just because I'm a wife and mother dont mean I dont battle depression, I was diagozed with PTSD and thats tough enough to deal with.. I read or play my PS 3 with games that occupy my mind and just allow me to focus on things.. I should read the Bible more and I do pray, and listen to music thats uplifting and encouraging.. Its been hard also on the "Friends" side of my life , I dont have many and the ones who "claim" to be friends dont keep in touch they just use me and abondon me anyway.. So I have God on my side and I know he's there and I have DH when he's not working and I have a son who's 21months old who depends on me and that is major help .. I pray you find some thing to help you along the way.. God bless and Email me any time..

BlessedMommy05

 

[AWorkInProgress]

I have the same problem. The people at church are self absorbed pompous indignant [wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth]s. Its no wonder most people don't goto church. Really I think people do this [wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth] deliberately to push people away from God. I try to go for a walk everyday but I found that just reaching out to some people. That some people are abusive and try to hurt you. Which adds to the problem. Most people with depression do no have a good support network.

That is when you pick up and find another church. If none around that is suitible, form a bible study with friends who are intrested. Or check out many of the online sources to find good sermans.

Don't let the failures of others stop you from getting wisdom and understanding you seek.

Hang in there Blessed.

If you are having problems or need to vent, we are here for you sister. Definately lean on the Lord, for he will not forsake you.

 

[JobM]

Websuspect, I am very sorry to hear (or read) that about your church. I've dealt with the same type of people in the town I worked in. It got to the point where I had to just drop everything and leave. Cuz I was about to lose my mind and [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth]. It's like they would look at you and say, "I don't like him, he is the enemy." Then they go out of their way to hurt you or do any and all they can to make your life hell. It's as if they don't have a life at all

I am very grateful that people at my church are nothing like that. They are kind and welcoming. The preacher has a great sense of humor and his messages have always been true to the bible.

I also struggle with loneliness at times. I'm an introvert too. People seem to frown on that but what do you do when people are generally toxic.

What I do to handle loneliness and depression is pray, write songs, play PS2 (usually a Tetris style game) Listen to music. (usually moody and contemplative)

I really need to read the bible more than I actually do though.

God Bless!