God-talk

[Jim B]

Just hatched:

Christianese: “fool for Christ” as in “Why am I insulting your intelligence? Why, I’m just a fool for Christ.”

English: This is a term used by some to justify brainless, silly, and frequently rude behavior done in the name of Jesus. The phrase comes from 1 Corinthians 4:10, “We are fools for Christ.” However, a closer look at the context of this expression will quickly reveal that it has nothing to do with insulting people or otherwise idiotic behavior, but everything to do with the undeserved reputation of the Apostles who had put themselves on the line for believers.​

©2004 Jim B. Miller​

(Share your favorite Christianese term!)​

 

[PatrickM]

This is great! Am still snickering at these

"Praise the Lord!" Generic exclamation equivalent to worldly "cool", but to sound "spiritual", use above.

"God will honor that" As if we do something extraordinarily spiritual, God is obliged to bless us for this.

Oh, this is great!

 

[Jim B]

Just hatched

Christianese: “Lord willing” as in “Lord willing, I’ll be there.”

English: Another way of saying “Not likely” without having to actually say it. Should be interpreted: “You may think I’m coming but I’m not.” Optional usage is “I don’t feel led to come to visit you in the hospital”” (see “I don’t feel led”).​

©2004 Jim B. Miller

 

[PatrickM]

Just hatched

Christianese: “Lord willing” as in “Lord willing, I’ll be there.”

English: Another way of saying “Not likely” without having to actually say it. Should be interpreted: “You may think I’m coming but I’m not.” Optional usage is “I don’t feel led to come to visit you in the hospital”” (see “I don’t feel led”).​

©2004 Jim B. Miller

Yes! And with the added benefit of blaming God for our laziness?

 

[Jim B]

Just hatched:

Christianese: “Man/Woman of God”

English:​

A phrase often used by people to distinguish individuals they admire and consider to have a “special anointing” (see “anointing”). Usually, though not always, this phrase identifies high visibility (think, television) ministers or preachers who write their own press releases. Strangely, the phrase is seldom used to identify the man or woman who modestly, without fanfare, visits the sick, cooks meals for the bereaved, or cleans the toilets at church.​

©2004 Jim B. Miller

 

[Jim B]

Christianese: “free in the Spirit” as in “I got free in the Spirit and ran around the church until a lung collapsed.”

English: Sometimes called “spiritual freedom.” This is another of those odd, unscriptural but biblical-sounding phrases. It is meant to describe what some people do in “free” churches. The idea is, if you are inhibited or shy by nature and unwilling to jump, shout, dance, gyrate, speak in tongues, or fall on the floor during a church service you are probably “bound in the spirit” (see “bound in the spirit”) and need to be “freed.” This will require prayer and coaxing by certain members of a congregation but with patience, will eventually free-up even the most reticent person.​

©2004 Jim B. Miller

 

[Jim B]

Christianese: “bound in the spirit” as in “She must be bound in the spirit; she hasn’t jumped a single pew.”

English: Inhibited and shy people are sometimes referred to as “bound in the spirit” because they do not express their joy in the same manner uninhibited and exhibitionist people do.​

Christianese: “Pharisee.”

English:​

A term used to describe someone who disagrees with you.​

(Share your favorite Christianese term)​

©2004 Jim B. Miller

 

[Jim B]

Christianese: “anointing, anointed” as in “Boy, the anointing is really on that preacher” or “I am anointed to stick my nose into the pastor’s business.”

English: Means “special” or “exceptional” by today’s definition of this biblical word. Biblically, “anointing” was an inaugural ceremony designed to set an individual or object apart for divine use. Such a person is said to be "anointed." Kings, prophets, and priests were anointed to make them both responsible for and accountable to the people (Baker’s Bible Dictionary). As the term is incorrectly used today, it has come to mean a person with unique appeal or assumed entitlement. It can run the gamut from identifying a particularly captivating preacher to admiring a deeply spiritual person and has become synonymous with the idea of being “special.” However, today there is no such things as a “special anointing,” except on Jesus Christ (Luke 4.18; Heb. 1.8-9), who is “Messiah” (lit. “The Anointed One.”) Technically, all God’s children are anointed; that is, “consecrated to a holy or sacred use” (Easton’s Bible Dictionary), see 2 Cor. 1.21; 1 John 2.20, 27.​

©2004 Jim B. Miller

(Share your favorite Christianese term with us)​

 

[Jim B]

Christianese: “Brother/Sister” as in “How are you Sister Sweetcakes” or “Hallelujah! Praise the Lord, Brother Whitewall.”

English: An old-fashioned way of saying “Mr.” or “Mrs.,” most often used by people in fundamentalist (who some claim are neither fun nor mental) and fundy-influenced denominations. It identifies “us” (Christians) as not being like “them” (nonbelievers) and helps keep personal relationships with fellow believers on a formal and impersonal basis. It is important not to get too close to other church members; there is always the danger they may see us without our cloaks. Therefore, it is necessary to keep relationships superficial. Avoiding the use of someone’s Christian name helps. When outsiders first encounter the custom it may sound like a cloister of monks and nuns but it is a more common tradition than you might think.​

©2004 Jim B. Miller

(Share your favorite Christianese term with us)

 

[PatrickM]

Well, since no one has done this yet, let me be a fool for Christ here! And feeling led to let go and let God, I am feeling free in the spirit to share with you my annointing, as a person of God. Don't be bound up in the spirit, and just be open to his mysterious ways. And before you all share with me about my critical spirit, just pray about it first!

I know, I know, I'll probably have complications recovering from my knee surgery for this now.

Love ya all!

 

[Jim B]

Well, since no one has done this yet, let me be a fool for Christ here! And feeling led to let go and let God, I am feeling free in the spirit to share with you my annointing, as a person of God. Don't be bound up in the spirit, and just be open to his mysterious ways. And before you all share with me about my critical spirit, just pray about it first!

By gum, Patrick, I believe you're getting the idea!!

 

[Jim B]

Just hatched

Christianese: “revival” as in “What America needs is a good old fashioned revival.”

English: A cliché of indeterminate meaning. No one knows for sure just what “revival” means? Definitions vary from denomination to denomination, but most commonly it means a series of widely-hyped weeknight services with a guest “evangelist” (see “evangelist”) and attended by either a sparse or enormous crowd, depending on the pizzazz of the preacher. The sermons are generally dynamic with lots of arm waving and shouting into a microphone, with the preacher loosening his tie and looking like he is about to hyperventilate. Souls are supposed to be saved in these gatherings and the meetings are usually enhanced by animated Southern Gospel music with plenty of handclapping and arm raising. These meeting may last until midnight. After the series of revival services is over things pretty much return to normal.

The term can also be used to indicate a broad, general spiritual awakening of national scope in which liberal Democrats finally see the light, abortion mills are closed down, beer drinkers and hell raisers become church members, porno shops are burned to the ground, gays become straight, and everybody begins talking Christianese.

In more contemporary churches revival is often referred to as “renewal.”​

©2004 Jim B. Miller

(Share your favorite Christianese term with us)​

 

[PatrickM]

Christianese: "share" As in get ready for me to tell you, but trying to soften the blow.

 

[PatrickM]

Just hatched

Christianese: “revival” as in “What America needs is a good old fashioned revival.”
. . . The sermons are generally dynamic with lots of arm waving and shouting into a microphone, with the preacher loosening his tie and looking like he is about to hyperventilate.

Kinda like the "Knute Rockne" speech?

After the series of revival services is over things pretty much return to normal.

How sad & true.

The term can also be used to indicate a broad, general spiritual awakening of national scope in which liberal Democrats finally see the light, abortion mills are closed down,

And these are bad things?

 

[Jim B]

Christianese: “evangelist” as in “I wonder where that evangelist buys his suits.”

English: Evangelists are the itinerant celebrities of the church. They travel in style from city to city, usually in airplanes, and stay in posh hotels with room service and Jacuzzis. They can usually be identified by the well-pressed business suit they wear along with certain tasteless accessories like bright ties, highly polished shoes, and a big gaudy gold wristwatch. They are called to conduct widely promoted revivals (see “revival”) in local churches and in the evenings will preach colorful and energetic sermons which they have preached hundreds of times for years in other locales and crack inane preacher jokes, sell tapes and books, raise money for their next “missionary” trip to Borneo, and generally make people feel guilty for not doing enough for Jesus. They also speak with gravely voices and say “doc” a lot.

The more successful evangelists have “TV ministries” which air on “Christian networks” over which they spend a lot of time talking about their need for money “to stay on this fine TV station” and to “get this message out to the world.”​

©2004 Jim B. Miller

(Share your favorite Christianese term with us)​

 

[nadroj1985]

This thread is hilarious. Kudos to Jim B

 

[Flynmonkie]

I cannot believe in all of this that no one has mentioned
"Bless their heart"!!! (a biggie to miss!)
"Lord Have Mercy"
"Well Praise the Lord"


Toe tappin' arms crossed over here waiting for the explainations on these - I have my own ideas being raised by a southern family but I want to hear yours first! I heard a comedian talk about these onct and it cracked me up!

 

[AfricaWim]

Christianese: “evangelist” as in “I wonder where that evangelist buys his suits.”

English: Evangelists are the itinerant celebrities of the church. They travel in style from city to city, usually in airplanes, and stay in posh hotels with room service and Jacuzzis. They can usually be identified by the well-pressed business suit they wear along with certain tasteless accessories like bright ties, highly polished shoes, and a big gaudy gold wristwatch. They are called to conduct widely promoted revivals (see “revival”) in local churches and in the evenings will preach colorful and energetic sermons which they have preached hundreds of times for years in other locales and crack inane preacher jokes, sell tapes and books, raise money for their next “missionary” trip to Borneo, and generally make people feel guilty for not doing enough for Jesus. They also speak with gravely voices and say “doc” a lot.

The more successful evangelists have “TV ministries” which air on “Christian networks” over which they spend a lot of time talking about their need for money “to stay on this fine TV station” and to “get this message out to the world.”​

Hehe this is so true it hurts

Man you are on a roll!! Don't stop.

The sad part is we sell many of these contorted isms as the way it should be: not standing back and judging it, but accepting it without doubt because that is the way everyone says it should be.
OUCH.

 

[Jim B]

Christianese: “thus saith the Lord.”

English: This is a phrase that frequently precedes a “word from the Lord” and is often used by prophets who sometimes really do have a word from the Lord. Too often, however, it is used by would-be (can you say, “false”?) prophets to add some authority to something they want to declare in order to get someone to do something they want them to do (can you say, “manipulation”?).

When this phrase is used to precede a statement, that statement is immune from appraisal or evaluation and must be taken at face value, no questions asked. When questions are asked you will probably here something like, “Don’t ask me. Hey, I am only the messenger.”​

©2004 Jim B. Miller

(Share your favorite Christianese term with us)​

 

[PatrickM]

I cannot believe in all of this that no one has mentioned
"Bless their heart"!!! (a biggie to miss!)
"Lord Have Mercy"
"Well Praise the Lord"

"Praise the Lord" was addressed on post #22.