Getting asked out

[Cute Tink]

If they're being nice to you, they're just being nice to me, too.

You wish. I've seen your picture on your profile. You are gorgeous. I mean that in all honesty.

I won't put up a picture. My ego can't take it.

 

[MrMoe]

This is a dangerous place for us girls isn't it?

QUICK GUYS I SEE A GIRL! CIRCLE THE WAGONS, NO ONE LEAVES UNTIL SHE MARRIES ONE OF US!

I saw her first! MINE, MINE, MINE!!!

 

[anewman1993]

I saw her first! MINE, MINE, MINE!!!

Would you believe me if I said this was my reaction to my own post?

Side note: Would a fight to the death solve this issue?

 

[Girly123]

Why don't like them being up front? I mean, I hate just texting a girl back and forth and not just asking her out, like, once I get to know you to a certain point, I know I don't want to be your friend, but get to know you romanticly, why waste each others time playing a game? If she likes me too we can go and start getting to know each other, if she doesn't then I'm not wasting my time or hers continuing to talk to her and hoping she likes me.

Plus....I'm not a very subtle person.

Every individual is different and perception varies. I was just voicing my opinion..

 

[anewman1993]

Every individual is different and perception varies. I was just voicing my opinion..

Oh I'm not like, looking down on it, I was just stating what I don't understand. A girl has never said yes, so I'm very open to change

 

[ReesePiece23]

Side note: Would a fight to the death solve this issue?

I'll special guest referee if you like...

 

[redblue22]

How do you normally get asked out? In person, through text, over the phone? How would you prefer to be asked out?

The couple of times I've been asked out it was through text and over the phone. I would prefer to be asked out in person.

I really don't have a preference or a normal way. I like when someone does something odd or new or brave. I like when a lone strange girl comes up and sits by me and introduces herself. I also like when two girls come up.

There just isn't a norm. Sometimes I feel bad when a friend is into some girl and he returns to tell me she's into me.

People are strange at churches.

 

[CCHIPSS]

You wish. I've seen your picture on your profile. You are gorgeous. I mean that in all honesty.

I won't put up a picture. My ego can't take it.

TBH gorgeous girls have problems too. They have a hard time telling who likes them for who they are, and who likes them just because of their looks. Guys can be great liars.

So-so, regular girls might have a harder time attracting guys. But the few they do attract would most likely like her as a person.

Similar things happens to guys too. A rich young man will have a hard time telling if a girl likes him for who he is, or only for his money. Girls can be great liars.

God put us into difference challenges.

 

[Cute Tink]

TBH gorgeous girls have problems too. They have a hard time telling who likes them for who they are, and who likes them just because of their looks. Guys can be great liars.

So-so, regular girls might have a harder time attracting guys. But the few they do attract would most likely like her as a person.

Similar things happens to guys too. A rich young man will have a hard time telling if a girl likes him for who he is, or only for his money. Girls can be great liars.

God put us into difference challenges.

I certainly agree. I was just noting that I doubt anyone asks leo out "just to be nice".

 

[SeekerOfChrist94]

I never get asked out. I prefer in person, though the only date I went on was asked through a text. In person or on a phone call is better.

 

[Girly123]

Oh I'm not like, looking down on it, I was just stating what I don't understand. A girl has never said yes, so I'm very open to change

I understand

 

[Legal_Eagle]

No girl has ever said yes? To asking her out? Maybe try a new approach?

 

[blackribbon]

How do you normally get asked out? In person, through text, over the phone? How would you prefer to be asked out?

The couple of times I've been asked out it was through text and over the phone. I would prefer to be asked out in person.

I don't care. "Wanna do something like catch a movie Friday night?" works well in person, over the phone, via text, or via Facebook the same way in my opinion. I have fought off a phone phobia since my husband died so that is probably my least favorite way...but texting works just fine. "Not in person" methods give you time to think about it if you are surprised by who is interested. As a woman/girl, the few times I have been the initiator, I prefer arranging a evening via text, email, or facebook because I am a coward and want to give them the chance to "be busy" without reject me to my face. The bad side is that you never know when they actually will read your message so you can be left wondering in your insecurities for a long time.

 

[DrStrange]

I have yet to have a girl ask me out...

I'm cursed...

 

[blackribbon]

I have yet to have a girl ask me out...

I'm cursed...

The going advice from even men is "women shouldn't take the lead or they will look desperate" ... and "nice girls don't ask" ... Luckily, I have gotten tired of waiting for a few men to build up the courage and just been willing to hurry the process along. I don't ask any different than I'd invite a girlfriend to do something with me...it just comes with more anxiety because I am worried about being perceived as being "desperate". I think I am really just ADHD and not good at waiting too long. Dropping hint on men doesn't seem to be a very productive way to operate.

 

[DrStrange]

The going advice from even men is "women shouldn't take the lead or they will look desperate" ... and "nice girls don't ask" ... Luckily, I have gotten tired of waiting for a few men to build up the courage and just been willing to hurry the process along. I don't ask any different than I'd invite a girlfriend to do something with me...it just comes with more anxiety because I am worried about being perceived as being "desperate". I think I am really just ADHD and not good at waiting too long. Dropping hint on men doesn't seem to be a very productive way to operate.

I have asked out countless times and I have heard every excuse under the sun. There is no logical explanation as to why this is the way for me other than God has cursed me.

Too nice...

Too mean...

...and everything in between.

 

[blackribbon]

I have asked out countless times and I have heard every excuse under the sun. There is no logical explanation as to why this is the way for me other than God has cursed me.

Too nice...

Too mean...

...and everything in between.

I think that is a shame...Why say "no" to a first date unless you are already involved with someone?...I don't get that...it never hurts to meet a new person. You aren't committing to anything but showing up, being clean, and being a friendly companion. I'm one and don't get why girls say "no"... maybe Disney fantasy residuals of the perfect man showing up on a white horse?

I did say "no" to one guy in high school even though it bothered my mother so much. He was a great guy and a strong Christian but he was looking for a wife and liked me enough that I thought it would be cruel to encourage anything with him. I was nowhere ready to consider a long-term relationship at that time.

 

[DrStrange]

I think that is a shame...Why say "no" to a first date unless you are already involved with someone?...I don't get that...it never hurts to meet a new person. You aren't committing to anything but showing up, being clean, and being a friendly companion. I'm one and don't get why girls say "no"... maybe Disney fantasy residuals of the perfect man showing up on a white horse?

I don't know either. Women in the west disgust me. I wish I could move to the east where people like me are more appreciated and sought after. That's what my cousin did when he moved to Japan.

 

[blackribbon]

I don't know either. Women in the west disgust me. I wish I could move to the east where people like me are more appreciated and sought after. That's what my cousin did when he moved to Japan.

okay...I think I might see part of the problem...I wouldn't date any guy who was "disgusted by me".....just saying, we have a second sense about those things...

 

[DrStrange]

oaky...I think I might see part of the problem...I wouldn't date any guy who was "disgusted by me".....just saying, we have a second sense about those things...

Materialism is rampant in the west and that is what motivates every person I know that has been in a relationship to abandon them.