Endless misery

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Thank you for your support.

Yes, I have been attending church and praying but nothing seems to work. I know that to get to the end I mustn't give up but it's so darn difficult. This depression is affecting me in a number of ways. It's affecting my work and studies.

I hate myself for putting myself in this situation. I'm a big pile of crap. I can't believe I was so stupid for so long. Why did I do all of those stupid things?

I pray that the Lord soon hears my prayers. I'm hanging on for deal life by the end of a thread. Thank you all. This pain is so unbearable. I'm going to get rid of it soon one way or another. Life stinks badly. God bless you all. angelgabriel
 
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amie

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Hi angelgabriel,
I am concerned about your statement of "I am going to end the pain one way or another" Please do not hurt yourself. If you fear you might, then you MUST allow us to help you! I am praying hard for you. so, you messed up. you made a mistake. you are human and you are going through the repercussions of your mistakes. You must hang on to faith, YOU MUST! Please do NOT give up! There IS a light at the end of a tunnel! Talk to me, I am right here! Talk to me!
Amie
 
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Remny

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Hey there dude. You should rejoice. All this misery you are feeling... it means you have learned what is important, and what brings true happyness. Not having these things can make you sad for sure. However you never would have found them without all this trouble.

God gives tough lessons, now you are so much better prepared to be truely happy. I hope you are aloud another chance with all this, that God gives you that chance. I pray for it. It would be beautiful to see things work out with you. It would be a great inspiration. I pray you are given the chance to be a good husband and a good father.

Don't give up,

Benjamin Jeanotte
 
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Just as I suspected. I just found out. My ex-wife now has a boyfriend and it's all my fault. Why did things end up this way???????? I just wish I could put my family back together again. I'd do it so much different now. I know that eventually God will get me through this. This is the worst pain that I've ever felt in my whole life. Knowing that because of my mistakes I have created this inevitable situation, it drives me to hate myself with a passion. I need God. I need something to get through this. I finally found out the worst. This is the lowest that I could feel. I hate myself!!!!! I hate myself!!!!!!! Oh God please help me!!!!!! I hate this!!!!!!!!!! Please change the situation. Get me through this. Thank you all for being there for me. I feel so lonely and helpless right now. Dating many girls and drinking alcohol has never helped me through this situation. If I've ever needed God more than any time in my life, it's RIGHT NOW. Pray for me my fellow Christians. Pray for me. It's hard and I'm in so much pain. I can't stop crying!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God bless you all. I envy all of you happy individuals. Don't take life for granted like I did. angelgabriel
 
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ZiSunka

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I have been through what you are going through.

Honest to God, don't give up. Perservere through it.

Don't believe that the dark clouds you are experiencing now are all there will ever be for you. Like anything else in life, this too shall pass. Honest.

Hang on. Hang on to Jesus. Hang on to us. Hang on to the knowledge that God has good plans for you, not plans to destroy you, but plans to give you a hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11  

Don't let your ex-wife destroy you. Don't let your own regrets destroy you, either. 2 Corinthians 2:7 talks about a sinner just like you. It says: "Forgive him and comfort him so that he isn't swallowed up by his sorrow." This is talking about YOU. Forgive yourself and comfort yourself so that you aren't ruined by your regrets.

God still has plans for you. Please live, so you can live them out.
 
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solo66 man

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I am feeling for you. But you must remember, some lose their whole families and didnt do ANYTHING to deserve it.
I lost my wife and I was completely understanding, loving all the time, not once did i go out on her in 28 years. Still, she does not need me. She always told me that she was so glad i listened to her. That many of her friends had husbands that never listened. I did and lived my life as a loving husband and still others are more important than I am. She tells me she has all she needs without me.
Then there are the ones who lose there families in accidents. A whole family wiped out.
Look, you still have your children. You still can build a new life. You have God. That is the most important thing ever. Join a Christian singles club at a church or use this time to concentrate on getting closer to God. Read and study about him. Get closer to your pastor.
There is so much out there for us. Dont stay in your darkness. You lost all you need to lose. You dont need to punish yourself. God loves you tremendously. You will be amazed at the doors about to open for you if you make yourself available.
God is good. God is good all the time.
 
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Remny

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Well thanks for the update. I have gone through this kind of heart break before as well! That makes it no easier on you. However, this kind of TREMENDOUSE pain. It is a great great lesson... when this finally subsides, you will have it to compare things to. If you can make it through this buddy, you will be able to know better joy before. Saddness, and pain, they are a lesson in the appreciation of joy, one must simply make it through the pain unjaded.

So I continue to pray, I pray you can make it through this without damaging your soul and without becomeing bitter, and I still pray you are granted a 2nd chance.

Please keep us updated, I will help as I can.

Benjamin Jeanotte
 
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Thank you all for your kind words.

Though I feel horrible right now, I know that I will get through it. I mean, how much worse can it get? This is as bad as it will ever get. I'm sure I will become stronger because of this.

I will continue to love my ex-wife and my kids with all of my heart. That will never change no matter what. I screwed up my marriage and I brought this all upon myself. I have no one to blame but myself.

I don't quite understand why I'm going through this but I trust that God is doing this for a reason. I know God wouldn't do this to intentionally hurt me. He is a beautiful God though at times it's difficult to understand why he puts us through severe trials. Some of these just don't make sense. I'm sure that in time, it will all make sense. I'm never going to be bitter nor will I ever turn my back on God. I love you all. God bless you. angelgabriel
 
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Couldn't help but noticed the intense vibes going through this thread as I read thru it. Can you guys feel the work of the Holy Spirit in here, or am I delusional? angel gabriel, if ever there was a time Jesus died for you, it's now. He died so that you can come back from the brink of insanity.

I don't know how to help, but from what I do know: Tell Him. Tell Him how much it hurts. Give your pain to Him. He knows, he's accepted your pain at the cross! You just need to give it to Him! Remember, He's crying with you. He's just beside you, Amie's beside you, we're all beside you. You'll pull thru this man! Finish this race!

Will pray for you now.
 
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