Embarrassing question..

[kevin10]

Hey,

I'm new here. Im 20 years old,and well i have a pretty disturbing question. Im a straight christian male,but yesterday my roomate who is also christian used my computer and found i had been looking at gay porn. I have no desire at all to date a guy or have relationship or whatever. Growing up during my teen years i had no christian guy friends my age,between 15-19. During those hard years,i got into gay porn,most likely i guess because i had no real relationships w/ guys during that time. Now my christian roomate is like freaked out because he caught me. I actually stopped doing it when i become friends with this guy. But it just popped up recently again,i tried to explain to him that im not attracted to guys. Its a mess,our friendship last few weeks has been growing and been so good. He said that it shouldnt get in way of friendship.

Well that was hard to say,im just trying to figure this out

 

[Beautiful Fireball]

Just so you know in the Men's Forum there is a specific forum for this kind of thing. They might be able to help you better over there.

 

[fuzzymel]

Being curious about the body does not make a person gay. He is probably just a little freaked right now. As ChildofGod said you should probably post this in the mens forum because they would be great at giving you the advice you need.

 

[kevin10]

yeah,he is freaked. i just dont want this to ruin the progress of our friendship..

 

[white dove]

Hey,

I'm new here. Im 20 years old,and well i have a pretty disturbing question. Im a straight christian male,but yesterday my roomate who is also christian used my computer and found i had been looking at gay porn. I have no desire at all to date a guy or have relationship or whatever. Growing up during my teen years i had no christian guy friends my age,between 15-19. During those hard years,i got into gay porn,most likely i guess because i had no real relationships w/ guys during that time. Now my christian roomate is like freaked out because he caught me. I actually stopped doing it when i become friends with this guy. But it just popped up recently again,i tried to explain to him that im not attracted to guys. Its a mess,our friendship last few weeks has been growing and been so good. He said that it shouldnt get in way of friendship.

Well that was hard to say,im just trying to figure this out

The mistake that many (many, not all) heterosexuals make is that any homosexual within 10 yards of them must automatically be attracted to them --because they are gay and gays are attracted to all same sex persons...no matter who they may be. *insert roll eyes emoticon* If your friend believes you to be homosexual, that might be his number one fear --however irrational that may be.


He'd already said that this discovery shouldn't get in the way of your friendship. I believe his sincerity. If he is a real friend, he will try to help you --or point you toward help that will truly be of benefit to you-- should you need it.

Thing about porn is that it is a quick resource for sexual frustration/release. I'm not sure why you'd go to porn for any other reason to be quite honest, so your rationale confuses me. Another thing is, it can be harmful in ways people don't even realize sometimes.

You were a confused teen when you started getting into gay porn... confused about how you felt about other guys? Are you still confused now?


Maybe the previous poster was correct on pointing you towards the men's section.

 

[Domenico]

You get the Occams Razor award matey.

 

[rocklife]

It's good you are not watching porn anymore. I hope you continue to replace bad habits with good ones. I also encourage you to continue in daily bible studies also, I like Bible on walkmen tapes personally. We all have to overcome sins, even though we may have different kinds of sins to overcome. God can help if we ask and persevere in doing what is right.

if you would like to listen to some interesting preachings, www.wayofthemaster.com has some, go to "Get Equipped" and Listen to audion lessons, I recommend listening to all that are available, they are interesting and encouraging. Also http://www.amazingfacts.org/media/lesson_study/lesson_study.asp has many interesting lessons. God bless

 

[BoarderDave]

I have a question, I dont want you to take it like Im throwing anything at you, or judging you or anything.. but Im just curious, How could one watch gay porn if they are not attracted to that sex? Cause I mean... guys watch porn to see girls and that sexual attraction. If there are no girls in the scene and you are finding those attractions, then how does that work? If you didn't have any attraction to it.. why would you keep watching it?

Im very sorry if that comes off like I'm hating on you or something. Its not. I was just confused a little. Thanks.

Best of luck with your friend. Hopefully he will believe you when you explain and he can get past it.

 

[hypnotism]

Hey,

I'm new here. Im 20 years old,and well i have a pretty disturbing question. Im a straight christian male,but yesterday my roomate who is also christian used my computer and found i had been looking at gay porn. I have no desire at all to date a guy or have relationship or whatever. Growing up during my teen years i had no christian guy friends my age,between 15-19. During those hard years,i got into gay porn,most likely i guess because i had no real relationships w/ guys during that time. Now my christian roomate is like freaked out because he caught me. I actually stopped doing it when i become friends with this guy. But it just popped up recently again,i tried to explain to him that im not attracted to guys. Its a mess,our friendship last few weeks has been growing and been so good. He said that it shouldnt get in way of friendship.

Well that was hard to say,im just trying to figure this out

So you were curious about gay porn. Big deal. It is not like you went to a gay bath house to view it live. It is not like you let one of those guys service you. So you say you are not interested in an actual personal malemale sex experinece. OK I accept it. What! Is it like the two guys who sit one chair apart in the movie theater because they are afraid the other guy will turn gay in the middle of the film? Why was he looking through your JPG files anyway?
A friend of mine pulls this trick. He asks some guy if he watches much porn. If yes
He asked do you prefer the male actor to be well endowed. If yes
He says something like "Oh you prefer a BC?"
Embarrased laughter follows.

 

[homeofmew]

If you got into this when you were young some younger people are more comfortable starting looking at stuff of their own sex. Porn in itself isn't a good thing it is addicting. Many people have this addiction Men and Women. I suggest deleting all the porn you have. Go get a hobby or an outside activity it helps.

 

[hypnotism]

If you got into this when you were young some younger people are more comfortable starting looking at stuff of their own sex. Porn in itself isn't a good thing it is addicting. Many people have this addiction Men and Women. I suggest deleting all the porn you have. Go get a hobby or an outside activity it helps.

Come on. Male male gay porn is Gross. Yecch!
And I agree with homeofmew and suggest you get a girlfriend.

 

[white dove]

Come on. Male male gay porn is Gross. Yecch!
And I agree with homeofmew and suggest you get a girlfriend.

Why should he get a girlfriend if he is quite possibly confused about his sexual orientation? Should he get a boyfriend, as well?

 

[Timyone]

Come on. Male male gay porn is Gross. Yecch!
And I agree with homeofmew and suggest you get a girlfriend.

far out that isnt a very useful thing to say!

i think maybe seeing a christian councellor could be a good option, as there is probably alot more to talk about on the toppic.

 

[SoulFly51]

Come on. Male male gay porn is Gross. Yecch!

And straight porn isn't gross?

Anyway, I was sexually abused as a young man by another male. That caused me to struggle with my sexuality when I got older - not that I was ever open about that, but I did like porno and didn't particularly care what brand it happened to be.

Today I'm a happily married man with two kids, and I'm still a horribly long way from perfect but I can say that I'm in a good place spiritually now.

But I only got here by having a good relationship with God, and if you're indulging in porn on a regular basis as you've admitted then you're in trouble spiritually - and that goes for everyone else reading this who really struggles.

I stopped the habit by admitting my porn problem to a few good Christian friends. Man, that was really embarassing, and I was sweating as I told them what I'd been into. But it turned out really well! My admission encouraged them to admit their sins to me, and from that point forward we began lovingly checking up on one another and hold each other accountable.

I've learned since then that this is one of the main functions of the church - a God-centered community made up of God-centered individuals where the community shapes the individual, and the individual shapes the community - all designed to bring everyone closer to God.

Its a beautiful thing.

Don't respond to this, but if something has happened to you in your past - abuse or something like that - seek out a Christian counselor and tell them about it. And seek out strong Christian brothers (face to face, not online) to confess this struggle to. You don't have to go into details - just tell them you struggle with looking at porn - and ask them to pray with you and hold you accountable.

The Bible teaches we should confess our sins to each other (James 5:16), and also to God (1 John 1:9).

Repentence involves turning away from your sin (not just saying your sorry while continuing to sin), and confession involves sharing your struggles with others.

Repentence is how you can be forgiven, and confession is how you heal (like it says in James). Forgiveness isn't very sweet if healing isn't involved.

Like I said, its beautiful.

 

[Timyone]

thanx for the post wes

 

[Tuffguy]

The guy might forgive you and even pretend to be your friend. But he will ALWAYS question how completely messed up it is for a guy that calls himself straight to be looking and stuff THAT messed up.

Seriously man. Throw your computer out the window if you need too.

 

[Kol]

Okay, let me just say what needs to be said.

To start things out, [wash my mouth] a [wash my mouth] and play [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth] until you [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth], which is probably going to be [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth]. If you don't want to do this, [wash my mouth] the [wash my mouth] on the ground until it quits [wash my mouth]. Stupid vibrating controllers. [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth] the [wash my mouth] and [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth] the [wash my mouth][wash my mouth] because [wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth] of the [wash my mouth][wash my mouth]. And [wash my mouth][wash my mouth]. Then it should work just fine.

Anyway, I hope this helps. Peace!

 

[hypnotism]

Good point about even straight porn being yuccky.
I would say imprinting himself with a sensual relationship with a female would be far more preferable than the alternative.
Selling off his computer or disabling internet access might be a very good idea. A student really needs his computer now days.

 

[Mrs. Luther073082]

[wash my mouth]. Stupid vibrating controllers. [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth] the [wash my mouth] and [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth] [wash my mouth] the [wash my mouth][wash my mouth] because [wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth] of the [wash my mouth][wash my mouth].

Best post ever.

 

[LogosPryme]

That must have been pretty embarrassing for you. I definitely commend you for not telling a whopper of a lie to cover it all up when you were caught. I can't say I wouldn't have if I was ever in a similar position.

Your friend must have seen your honesty in this situation and I am sure- in a way- that might be something that will actual strengthen your friendship.

This might have well been good for you, because- as I understand- you have kept this in the dark for so long.The Bible tells us in James to confess our faults one to another, and pray for each other that we may be healed. This kind of stuff should never be left to fester in the dark.

I really hope your friend, being a CHRISTian, can follow the example of Christ and be a shoulder to lean on in this circumstance and will be praying for you diligently. If he is honest with himself he will not be able to judge you for all the wrong he has done in his life as well.

Anyways, I am glad you have been open, despite the courage that must have taken you and I will pray for you in the name of Jesus Christ.

Be blessed and at peace.