Does it ever get better

[caeli89]

I have been struggling with the after math of rape. It has been 8 months now. I look like I have it all together on the outside but on the inside I'm falling apart. I can't sleep and Im anxious all the time. I have not self worth and my sense of security is gone. My relationship with God is suffering. I feel hopeless. I have a hard time talking and expressing my feelings. I know being raped was my fault but I can't deal with it. I just want to know if it ever gets any better.

 

[joey_downunder]

Please seek professional counselling ASAP. You sound like you really need someone to talk to who knows what to say and what support you need right now.

 

[TomCS]

I don't know what else to say, but I did just want to say that being raped was not your fault!

 

[RuthD]

I have been struggling with the after math of rape. It has been 8 months now. I look like I have it all together on the outside but on the inside I'm falling apart. I can't sleep and Im anxious all the time. I have not self worth and my sense of security is gone. My relationship with God is suffering. I feel hopeless. I have a hard time talking and expressing my feelings. I know being raped was my fault but I can't deal with it. I just want to know if it ever gets any better.

It was NOT your fault. You have to know that and believe that and you will start to heal. I suggest getting help, seeing a doctor and counselor. I got help and I am lots better. Time heals too although you will never forget, thoughts of it will fade in time. You are feeling all the things a rape survivor feels and that is normal for what you have been through. I'm really so sorry that happened to you. Rape is a horrible devestation and ruiner of ones life temporarily but you really need to get help so your healing journey will begin. Pray to Jesus for guidance and remember that God works through people to help you. You can get much much better. I know I did. Take one day at a time and don't blame yourself. I am praying to Jesus for you.

 

[caeli89]

Thank you everyone. I do see a dr and a therapist but I have trouble really opening up. ITs getting harder and harder to go on with life. I have no hope and see no point. I have to live everyday with his picture in my mind and think about how stupid I was. I hate myself

 

[Spunkn]

Sorry to hear you had to go through that Caeli, that's a horrible experience.

If you need someone to talk to, you can always PM me.

 

[joey_downunder]

I am sure you know in your head it wasn't your fault at all. It can be hard to make the heart catch up with the head sometimes.

Help and healing for abuse survivors. Compassionate support for both genders


Whether or not this assault happened when you were an adult or a child - you ARE a survivor of abuse. God KNOWS what really happened, you had no choice in the matter.

If you feel uncomfortable *saying* what you're going through to a therapist, how about you write/type what you're struggling with instead?

Please contact emergency services if you feel any worse.

 

[caeli89]

Thank you for your support it means a lot. Some days are good and others are bad, it's very unpredictable. My biggest problem is I hold it all in until I just can't. At that point I don't know how to let it out in a healthy way.

 

[Spunkn]

You could try writing some thoughts and feelings down. Just write it down, then you can keep it if you want, or you can just throw it away. It's surprising sometimes how just talking to someone, or writing something down will release a lot of stress.

A lot of people find blogging very helpful as well, just be sure to keep it private so that you are protected. Find someone you can trust, and just talk to them about things every now and then. Get your feelings out, and don't let them build up until they explode.

 

[Johnnz]

How are you going?

John
NZ