Of course we don’t “choose Him first.” None of us would have any Gospel of salvation if God hadn’t “so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.”
It is all according to God’s sovereign grace and mercy that He reaches down to save us. The Lamb of God was slain “from the foundation of the earth”, it was always God’s perfect will and plan. So, yes, we are absolutely not born of God without the provision of God in our Saviour, Jesus Christ.
And we are “born of God”, after we turn to Him in faith and believe, not before. No one is born of God apart from faith in the Son.
You can not have faith in the Son except you are first born of God.
I already showed the relevant verses.
All who are natural born are all carnally minded, And all carnally minded are at enmity with God.
The carnal mind it says cannot be submitted to God's law, so it certainly can not believe in Christ when God tells the carnal mind to repent, God's command is just ignored, it is why they are the sons of disobedience.
Romans 8
6 For to be carnally minded is death, but to be spiritually minded is life and peace.
7 Because the carnal mind is enmity against God; for it is not subject to the law of God, nor indeed can be.
8 So then, those who are in the flesh cannot please God.
You can NOT choose to be carnal or spiritual, you are what you were born to be, either carnal or spiritual, there is no inbetween state of existence.
Romans 8
9 But you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you. Now if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he is not His.
Romans 8
5 For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit, the things of the Spirit.
IF YOU LIVE according to the SPIRIT, than means God made you born of God so that you have eternal life, this is not some kind of personal choice to make, to either at one moment be carnally minded or at another moment spiritually minded.
If you live according to the FLESH, well your dead, spiritually dead and not in Christ.. People have turned this passage into some kind of daily personal decision they can make, which is also being double minded, and an impossibility, since you are either born of God or not.