Do Christian guys exist?

[WorshipArtViolin]

Well, the plan is to live in separate buildings, maybe in different towns? I didn't work out the logistics yet. If he's going to med school like me then he'll have no money for a marriage. So hence why I said 27+ who knows? I'll leave the logistics up to God hahaha. Which verse is that? Lol

1 Corinthians 7 talks about marriage and all that 'if you must ,get married to avoid sexual sin'.... But then again, that's really debatable when it comes to some other things the Bible says haha.
I'd like to tell you that as much as you've planned it all out :-D your plans may not even come close to what God has in store for you so keep an open mind... God speaks to us in so many different ways so just keep your eyes ,ears and heart open to His word

 

[lovelife34]

Thanks. Stuff happens. You'll be fine.

Thanks, oak. Same with you.

 

[lovelife34]

1st Corinthians 7:8-9, "Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion."

However you plan to handle the dating/engagement thing, that's up to you completely! You do you! But as a man, I'd have a difficult time going longer than three years with someone without marriage. 1-2 years is plenty for a relationship, and a year-long engagement. You should know by then if that person is marriage worthy.

Oh, I thought you were joking about the verse. You'd spend the rest of your life with someone after dating for 1 year? :o Maybe I'm conservative then, I definitely don't think I would. I see so much divorce in the US, it scares me. It makes it seem like many people are choosing the wrong person. XD

 

[lovelife34]

It does sound sort of unrealistic that I could meet someone and get married within a short time frame.. maybe within a year or two.

maybe you could!! I just meant I want to wait. My friends say I'm asking for too much to date for 5 years. I just want to 100% know that is the right person. XD In 5 years, the person may evolve and I want to make sure it's a positive change. XD

 

[Saucy]

Oh, I thought you were joking about the verse. You'd spend the rest of your life with someone after dating for 1 year? Maybe I'm conservative then, I definitely don't think I would. I see so much divorce in the US, it scares me. It makes it seem like many people are choosing the wrong person. XD

I'm a bit older and matured (not that you're not mature haha). My window is shrinking and I want to have kids. I don't think I'd wait that long before marriage. If you go about it the smart way, meet someone in the right places (like church), and even find someone who has been a friend for a long time and you know them well, it makes it easier.

There's no wrong answer, so you do whatever makes you the most comfortable.

 

[lovelife34]

1 Corinthians 7 talks about marriage and all that 'if you must ,get married to avoid sexual sin'.... But then again, that's really debatable when it comes to some other things the Bible says haha.
I'd like to tell you that as much as you've planned it all out :-D your plans may not even come close to what God has in store for you so keep an open mind... God speaks to us in so many different ways so just keep your eyes ,ears and heart open to His word

Hahaha yep. I know it's all in God's hands. I actually don't have anything planned. XD

 

[lovelife34]

I'm a bit older and matured (not that you're not mature haha). My window is shrinking and I want to have kids. I don't think I'd wait that long before marriage. If you go about it the smart way, meet someone in the right places (like church), and even find someone who has been a friend for a long time and you know them well, it makes it easier.

There's no wrong answer, so you do whatever makes you the most comfortable.

Yeah, I agree. I want kids too. Eventually

 

[WorshipArtViolin]

Oh, I thought you were joking about the verse. You'd spend the rest of your life with someone after dating for 1 year? Maybe I'm conservative then, I definitely don't think I would. I see so much divorce in the US, it scares me. It makes it seem like many people are choosing the wrong person. XD

Seems like I'm going to be jumping in the middle of other conversations :-D anyway, I feel like we get so caught up in trying to get to know a person BEFORE marriage that we forget the real work comes AFTER. So whether you dated someone for 5 months, a year or 10, it all comes down to God being the centre of your marriage and both husband and wife working together to make it work. I personally think 1 year is enough for dating especially if you know for sure that he's the one

 

[Seun]

Hahaha yep. I know it's all in God's hands. I actually don't have anything planned. XD

Same here. I feel like I should probably put myself out there more often. I grew up in a household where dating was strictly to be avoided because my parent did not want to risk us potentially getting pregnant. Understandably I avoided dating because for some reason our school had an issue with student pregnancy. I think the downside of this is I never got to get any dating experience..

 

[WorshipArtViolin]

Same here. I feel like I should probably put myself out there more often. I grew up in a household where dating was strictly to be avoided because my parent did not want to risk us potentially getting pregnant. Understandably I avoided dating because for some reason our school had an issue with student pregnancy. I think the downside of this is I never got to get any dating experience..

Trust me, there's nothing amazing about dating one guy after the other and it not working out in the end. Although it does kind of toughen you up for the future haha but you're at a much better position than you probably would have been. You have seen how the dating life goes I'm sure and probably have learnt from some of your friend's mistakes. You will make your own but at least you have an idea of how to go about it. But one thing is you shouldn't do it just to see what it's like. Wait for the right guy and if you end up getting married to him, you'll be so glad that you only got to meet him and learn how to love one man.

 

[mark kennedy]

I agree with that piece of advice. I have no intention of finding someone anytime soon. God will let me know when it's time. Haha, he may not get out a lot!!! Why is that?

Just something I've noticed, Christians have a tendancy to go home rather then be out running around. I don't really have a hand book on the habits of the Christian male but hopefully he is more into Bible study then Facebook.

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

Same here. I feel like I should probably put myself out there more often. I grew up in a household where dating was strictly to be avoided because my parent did not want to risk us potentially getting pregnant. Understandably I avoided dating because for some reason our school had an issue with student pregnancy. I think the downside of this is I never got to get any dating experience..

BLESSINGS UPON BLESSINGS !

"dating experience" is NOT something to desire, to seek, to hope for, to have, nor to consider good.

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

Oh, I thought you were joking about the verse. You'd spend the rest of your life with someone after dating for 1 year? Maybe I'm conservative then, I definitely don't think I would. I see so much divorce in the US, it scares me. It makes it seem like many people are choosing the wrong person. XD

Not only are many people choosing the wrong person ,
rather it would not matter who they chose - they are not living submitted nor obedient to God.
When marriages were arranged, there was much less divorce (I think) and many many more lifetime marriages. They were "raised in the way they should live" and when they were older they did not depart far from it. They did not go by feelings, and did not make up excuses that were popularly allowed and legal for separating or divorcing --- they knew God's Word and stuck to it faithfully, just as they were raised to. (yes, there were exceptions, as illustrated by God Himself using Israel showing in them examples of the results
both of living right and doing what is right
and living wrong and doing what is wrong
--- God showed the difference and gives clear instructions regarding all this.

 

[lovelife34]

Seems like I'm going to be jumping in the middle of other conversations :-D anyway, I feel like we get so caught up in trying to get to know a person BEFORE marriage that we forget the real work comes AFTER. So whether you dated someone for 5 months, a year or 10, it all comes down to God being the centre of your marriage and both husband and wife working together to make it work. I personally think 1 year is enough for dating especially if you know for sure that he's the one

I don't think getting to know someone before marriage is directly correlated to knowing that the real work comes after marriage. At the end of the day, we all see the world differently, and are entitled to our own opinions on how long to date. Obviously we're all just speculating. Only God knows our actual paths to marriage.

 

[redblue22]

Dating is a good thing because you get to know people and you know yourself better. And if you wait to marry, you get to know that person you see for a long time. But absence make the heart go wander.

During that time of years, you can deal with other sins and temptations besides sexual temptations. For example, my strongest temptations have nothing to do with sex.

 

[redblue22]

I don't think getting to know someone before marriage is directly correlated to knowing that the real work comes after marriage. At the end of the day, we all see the world differently, and are entitled to our own opinions on how long to date. Obviously we're all just speculating. Only God knows our actual paths to marriage.

What is the "real work"? Examples?

 

[lovelife34]

Same here. I feel like I should probably put myself out there more often. I grew up in a household where dating was strictly to be avoided because my parent did not want to risk us potentially getting pregnant. Understandably I avoided dating because for some reason our school had an issue with student pregnancy. I think the downside of this is I never got to get any dating experience..

Oh yeah, I had strict parents too. You don't need to do a thing, in my opinion. When the time comes, I think you'll know.

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

"Good things" (in God's Sight) do not lead to sin, promote sin, 'cause'? sin, nor make excuses for sin, nor cause the little ones to stumble.

 

[lovelife34]

What is the "real work"? Examples?

Lol...from speculation, I'd say the "real work" is compromising, putting the other person first (sometimes), leaning on God for your problems, making sure you pray together, communicating with each other if you have an issue instead of telling your friends about it, staying committed to the vow that you put before God that you'd stay married til death do you part.... I'm 22 with no dating experience...that's just my speculation. I actually have no experience with this "real work."

 

[WorshipArtViolin]

I don't think getting to know someone before marriage is directly correlated to knowing that the real work comes after marriage. At the end of the day, we all see the world differently, and are entitled to our own opinions on how long to date. Obviously we're all just speculating. Only God knows our actual paths to marriage.

What I meant by after marriage is when the 'real work' comes is that, that's when you see a person's true self so the dating period tends to be not too trusting lol
But true, Only God knows what lies ahead