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Desperate! Prayer for salvation!

Discussion in 'Prayer Wall' started by JL_Marais, Feb 6, 2002.

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  1. JohnR7

    JohnR7 Well-Known Member

    >>Pray for strength for me to be able to not do that.

    The problem of course is your willingness to accept the strength that God has for you in this situation. Usually, we have to die to self in order to live for God. We are often more willing to do this, when we can open up our eyes a little bit and see where we are going, so as not to be so controled by our feelings.

    Here is a part of Pat Roberson's teaching on the subject:

    Should A Christian Marry An Unbeliever?

    "Absolutely not. The Bible says, "Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers ... What accord has Christ with Belial" (II Corinthians 6:14-15)? Billy Graham put it very succinctly a few years ago when he said that if you take an unbeliever for a mate you also get the devil for your father-in-law. Much heartache results when Christians marry unbelievers. Some Christians go ahead and marry unbelievers, thinking that they can convert them after marriage. But if God has really chosen that man or woman for you, He is perfectly capable of bringing that person to Himself before the marriage. If He does not do it, it is a good enough sign that this marriage is not what He wants for you. Christians need to learn to wait on the Lord, to wait for what is right. Anything short of that can prove to be a dreadful mistake."

    If you are married to someone who is not a believer, then sooner or later, you will have to seperate from that person. You can not travel together with them as partners, because your destination is different from theirs. For me, I want to put God first in my life. I am going to heaven and I want to take as many people along with me as I can. I would hope that I would be willing to do all I can to help people along the way. There are going to be people we love and care about along the way, that just do not want to go along with us. After all, we are to love our enemy. But we just can not let that hinders us. We must put God and our love for God first. We sure do not want to love our enemy more than God. Thanks, JohnR7
  2. WhitBit

    WhitBit Mirror of His Heart

    My apologies for not responding to the "equally yoked" question, JL!! I'm afraid somehow the thread slipped away from me, and now I think that JohnR7 answered that bit quite well in the first half of the post...

    "If you are married to someone who is not a believer, then sooner or later, you will have to seperate from that person. You can not travel together with them as partners, because your destination is different from theirs."

    *gently raised eyebrow...*

    "In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands, even those who refuse to accept the Good News. Your godly lives will speak to them better than any words. They will be won over by watching your pure, godly behavior." ~ 1 Peter 3:1-2

    And Jesus states clearly that there are to be no terms for divorce except adultery ...(Matthew 5:32)

    Other than that...I agree whole heartedly!

  3. Carrot

    Carrot New Member

    Well I wouldn't be here if my mum hadn't have married an "unbeliever" who became a christian and an awesome one after marrige, so I believe that God can bring good out of all circumstances.
  4. SenseiPiccolo

    SenseiPiccolo Well-Known Member

    You all will be in my prayers...
  5. fieldmouse3

    fieldmouse3 Contributor

    I just prayed for you!
  6. His_Saving_Grace

    His_Saving_Grace New Guy on the block

    Pick up the book The Grace Awakening by Charles Swindoll. It should help you quite a bit.
  7. JL_Marais

    JL_Marais New Member


    Without sounding unthankful I don't know Pat Roberson and I only listen to what is in the Bible. Thereby I'm not saying that he is wrong, but the picture painted did not feel right to me. See the referance below and be VERY careful (again not you personally :) ) to judge people. I've heard the expression of 'playing God'. That is exactly what I feel it is. It might be wrong and it would (most) probably be better to stay away, but I believe that no one (currently - Jesus could) on this earth has the authority to say who will be condemned or who will be saved.

    Thanks for the feedback though. I believe it all helps to some extent.

    1 Corinthians 7

    7 I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.
    8 Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am.
    9 But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
    10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband.
    11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.
    12 To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her.
    13 And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him.
    14 For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
  8. JL_Marais

    JL_Marais New Member

    Now and then the reality (would like to call it possibility rather) dawns on me that I might have to leave her for real.

    Have I mentioned that she is the happiness in my life?

    Do you read the above sentence and comprehend? Happiness - what it feels like when you feel good.

    Before her I was like a dead man walking. Nothing excited me. Do you know what that feels like?

    The possibility of going back to that leaves me short of breath and gives me a sick feeling on my stomach.

    God is love. He should surely know the best what love is about.

    Dear God in heaven, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.

    Dear God in heaven, you know my heart. Hear it tonight.

  9. JL_Marais

    JL_Marais New Member

    One more thing I might mention. Her best friend and possibly biggest influence is a girl named Ingrid. Ingrid is 'sort-of Christian'. If she would find certainty and true faith it would really help a great deal in her influence towards Sarah as well.

  10. WhitBit

    WhitBit Mirror of His Heart

    "The possibility of going back to that leaves me short of breath and gives me a sick feeling on my stomach. "

    I guarantee that God can replace that sick feeling like you've never dreamt - And he will bless you a gazillion times over for obeying His will and trusting His wisdom :)

    "And everyone who has given up houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or property, for my sake, will receive a hundred times as much in return and will have eternal life."

    ~Matthew 19:29
  11. Redeemed1

    Redeemed1 Passionate Worshiper

  12. edjones

    edjones Active Member

    JL_Marais, I am praying that God will work everything out.

    Psalm 37:4
    Delight thyself also in the LORD: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

    3 Let not mercy and truth forsake thee: bind them about thy neck; write them upon the table of thine heart:
    4 So shalt thou find favour and good understanding in the sight of God and man.
    5 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
    6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
  13. dnich163

    dnich163 dnich163

    I am afraid that the Bible itself is littered with marriages and love affairs that didn't come to pass.
    It seems true love is never easy or smooth.
    For me the key question is ' do you really love each other ' or perhaps just ' do you love her enough to give up your faith '
    I converted myself from being Protestant to RC, and all for lust ( at first ) but that was 32 years ago now.
    Since then I have discovered or uncovered the Catholic faith for myself.
    The problem with conversion is that it is okay if you are incoming, but frowned upon if you are leaving.

    The big question is will you be a better person/husband because of this conversion.
    It could be your Damascus road after all !

    That famous Jesuit Anthony De Mello would advise you " to rush into the din of battle, but keep your heart at the lotus feet of the Lord "

    Anyway...good luck.
  14. StogusMaximus

    StogusMaximus Well-Known Member

  15. JL_Marais

    JL_Marais New Member

    Hi again.

    We have succesfully ignored the issue for another few weeks. It still pops up and I think the popping up would become more frequent and more serious from now on. She said she needs 'time-out' to decide 'once and for all'. She said this before, but no real 'time-out' has happened yet. Each time I get so upset and unhappy and maybe I influence her then.

    .......sigh :(

    I think I need to give her this time now even though I didn't really prevent her from having it previously. The last time I was surprised when she ended her SMS with 'Hope to see you soon'. I was so happy to see those few words.

    True love, or even just love is so hard to find these days. Here is this girl that fulfilled all my expectations for the 'perfect girl' that I so many times thought I would NEVER get. Well well... can you immagine... my first girlfriend and it was just magic.

    Did I mention how we met?
    One of the most amazing stories. She drove into my car. I was quite upset, but I let out one swear word in the car and walked out and asked her 'what do we do now - its the first time this happened to me', (but I wasn't nasty at all and she later said that she noticed that). I was quite upset. It was my dream car and the repairs cost R40 000 (about... $5 000 ... our currency not doing to well lately)... well, insurance paid 90% of it. Later she phoned me and asked if we could go to give the statement at the Police together. We would meet at a coffee shop. We did and went to the Police and afterwards I got this very profound and certain feeling of "YOU CAN'T LET THIS ONE GO". Divine intervention, or something. I just knew it. So I pushed and said 'We never did get that coffee.' I was completely stressed out then and just after that - "WHAT DID I JUST DO? THAT WAS INSANE." I did most of the talking and I called her the next day to ask if I can see her again. That call was even worse, but I just knew I had to.

    The guy she was with treated her so badly and he made her cry on a regular basis. I just wanted to love her and make her happy. I guess that sounds like a cliché.

    My heart is heavy and letting her go would be the toughest thing I would have to do to this point in my life. I don't know how I would handle it. She loves me too. I just pray that God would be merciful and read what's in my heart. I know his will will be done.

    PS. Thank you for the post edjones. It came in while I was typing this message. I thought this thread had reached the end of its lifetime since its on page ... 4 already, I think.

    All your sympathy and advice meant a lot to me and I'm glad I found this forum. I think its a great inspiration and help to many people by many people. The real help is from fellow believers and that's beautiful.

    To the person (Redeemed1) that said there might be something else wrong in my life as well if 'I was a dead man walking' ... that might be true and I'm praying that my own life would be more according to Jesus's example after this.

    Just now another post arrived: Thank you David. The thread isn't dead after all :) I don't know if you are suggesting that I convert, because that would be to betray Jesus. :cry: I wish God Himself could tell me (or Sarah) what to do...

    Yet another mail arrived just now. I'm starting to feel that God is reaching out his hand to me through this... This thread had been stagnant so long and now even before I posted this these come through. God provides even before you ask. My faith is probably not what it should be. I keep on thinking "What can I do?!", when in fact my role probably ended in her decision a while ago and its probably something like the longer I try to interfere the longer the Holy Spirit would stay away and would not reveal the truth to her.

    I pray now that this would happen; and belive that God's will will be done.
    I pray to have the strength to stay away from her for as long as necessary for the Holy Spirit's work to be done; and belive that God's will will be done.
    I pray to have the strength to accept her decision when its not the way I would have liked it to be, for this could destroy me if I have to go through with it without God's help; and belive that God's will will be done.
    I pray that God will guide me to help her in early Christianity (if that's what I should do) when the time comes; and belive that God's will will be done.
    I pray that God will accept her anew and hold her like only a loving father would and that she would find new joy and love for God and that it be visible to all around her; and belive that God's will will be done.

    ...for me and the woman i love are but only worthless weak people in front of God; still He cares about us.
  16. Kristen

    Kristen Blah Blah

    I will pray!
  17. soulsisterclaire

    soulsisterclaire JESUS DIED FOR YOU & ME

    I am praying for your situation...
  18. amie

    amie Survivor

    I am praying for you my friend...Follow your heart!

    Amie :angel:
  19. JL_Marais

    JL_Marais New Member

    Since we last spoke...

    She sort of accepts that I would remain Christian and that we would move away to the coast because we both like it there and because we would like to (in the back of our minds, or maybe not so much in the back sometimes) get away from the restrictions. She could be fired (she probably really would be) if she is seen in public with me and it looks like we are together. She works for very religious people at the moment. I said that I would share some Jewish customs with her because I don't think its wrong anymore. Refer to thread: http://www.christianforums.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=8676

    So she goes and tells her parents about our plans on Passover. (probably not the best timing either) They all of a sudden say that they would not support her and would disown her and wouldn't go to her wedding etc.

    I asked her if she didn't see it coming. She said no, she didn't think they would feel so strong about it.

    Her parents don't even really practice. She was very disappointed because she SMSed 'they would probably not even have the seder' ... and 'that her parents were just wishy washy'. I think its very wrong of them to react that way when they live like that, but that would probably be judging them, so I'll just try to abstain from judgement.

    Naturally she feels very torn now because she would have to give either me or her family up. What a choice to have to make. Can you believe it... or try to imagine it.

    She still persists that it shouldn't be such a big deal to become Jewish and I'm just making a big issue about it. She says there is only one God and I must just pray to Him. She doesn't understand and usually I'm just dumbstruck when she makes it like its nothing.

    She called me again later and was whispering. 'can you hear me? .... yes... i want to bmmrrmmm yso.... what? i want hmm whrrrr ymm.... what? .... i want to marry you... oh. ok... are you proposing? .... i'm not sure'

    She also said that I must just share Jewish things with her and not tell the children where I'm going when I go to church. The children should be Jewish. I sort of agreed to that previously and its the part that scares me the most when I sit down and think about it.

    ..then another call came through and I would phone her back later. She then said she's still feeling torn... etc...

    I'm hoping if I go through with it that God could do something through me to save her and my kids (that I don't have yet, by the way), but at the same time I cannot depend on that happening. It might be a very heavy cross for me to bear as time goes by. It might be my punishment for not letting her go now, but referring to scripture below... it could be understood as love is the state I'm in.

    Song of Solomon 8

    6 Set me like a seal upon your heart, like a seal upon your arm; for love is as strong as death, jealousy is as hard and cruel as Sheol (the place of the dead). Its flashes are flashes of fire, a most vehement flame [the very flame of the Lord]!
    7 Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it. If a man would offer all the goods of his house for love, he would be utterly scorned and despised.

    Thanks to my friends on this forum.

    Talk to you again later.

    ps. Now I'm tired. :sleep: Still at work at 10pm. Going home.
  20. Jenn

    Jenn New Member


    I'm praying for both of you, stay strong and put this in God's hands.

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