McNabb said:
yea i was depressed about the second coming but your words make me more secure, u know? just dont think about it because it'll beat me up inside more that it really should
HI McNabb!
At the risk of being number 3209876534 telling you what to do, here's my 2 cents.
I've been a Christian as well, and recognize a lot of what you've told. There's a lot about Christianity that made me worry. Things such as Hell, the second coming, death, whether you're a good Christian, and how to love a man who walked the earth some 2000 years ago and did some incomprehensible things which defy any belief. It's hard indeedy.
I'm not going to tell you what to believe or what not.. all i can say is that you yourself have all the answers, if you just take the liberty to have an unbiased look at things. Just remember 1 thing: the only place you have ever been in your life is here and now. Maybe some years or even days ago, you worried about today, or maybe today you regret what you did yesterday. The future and the past as such only exist in your mind, and there's no point in worrying about it whatsoever.. just let it come as it is
I'm not telling you to put down your responsibilities or anything. Just do what you have to, but don't make any more of it than nescessary. It's a bit like doing the dishes.. you can do them thinking about why you always have to do the dishes, and how much you really hate it, and how you'd rather be at the computer or watching telly or whatever.. or you can just do it, be in the moment, feel the water, see how you're cleaning things. It's a whole different experience.
You can actually make it a habit to go back to here and now whenever you catch yourself wandering off in the territory of the maelstrom of the mind, so to speak. Just zoom back to here and now, and experience it as it is. feel the wind in your hair, see where you are, be conscious of your being in it's surrounding. Don't try to be anything other than what you (think) you are or shoould be.
That's all really.