dealing with toxic individuals

[kenneth nathan]

I have come across people who were rude to me and treated me badly. It doesnt quite get to me. When i encounter people that make me feel hostile, portray a negative attitude, in general. It gets to me. When the people around them are so nice and friendly, it becomes obvious that there is something wrong with that individual. Uninterested and very cold it makes me wonder why people are like that, they are evidently outspoken and no good reason to ignore and protray a negative attitude toward the people around them. They cant related with people. They cant relate with children. That is a clear give way treating their own children like robots telling them to do this and that. No emotions. No sense of attachment to their children. Thats why it gets to me probably cause it involves children. When your like "whatever" to me i can digest that cause i can't expect everyone to like me. When your like that to your own kids and people around you. It makes me sick and I want to avoid such people. I feel disgusted. My mind ponders upon it wanting to lash out. Say something to these individuals.

There is no point, they would tell me to mind my own business. Psychologically they have some kind of effect on me. Out of nowhere, i think about them, lash at them in my head. It paralyses me. It creates anxiety cause i told myself its not worth thinking about, I think about them anyway. I try so hard to not think about it once, the fact that I can't stop thinking about it, is an inner struggle thats difficult to overcome.

 

[Gordon Wright]

It is very legitimate and very Bibilical to hate sin. To do this without also hating the sinner is tricky.

The only thing that works for me is this: be willing to forgive whenever someone repents. Imagine how you would respond if this person sincerely repented. Play that movie in your head. How would you handle it? How would you feel?

As for dealing with him now, there is nothing in Christianity that mandates you to enable his bad behavior in any way. But choose your battles. It's likely he's the tip of an iceberg. He may be surrounded by enablers in an enabling church culture.

This happens a lot. Cowardice creeps into a church, and everyone makes excuses for shying away from the spiritual battle. They'll quote verses about gentleness out of context - but they won't be gentle with you. Don't let them mess with your head. Jesus never let anybody mess with his head. He always stood his ground.

Every church I've tried has some sort of cultural neurosis. I've given up on church shopping and decided to focus on the body of Christ in a larger sense.

 

[Gordon Wright]

Another consideration: what you're describing might be a sign that he has been abused and is emotionally damaged. Try to talk with him and see where he's coming from. If he won't talk to you, that's not your responsibility. But be willing to listen. It may be there's another side to the story.

 

[777Sloan]

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