Dealing with my own unforgiveness for someone who has died

[Christownsme]

This story brings me to tears each time, because what I did was ignorant and stupid.

In highschool I was in chess league. There was a kid who often took the Lord's name in vain. In Sunday School class, I was taught that taking the Lord's name in vain was blasphemy of the Holy Ghost. That scared me so much I forced myself never to say anything worthy of such a sin.

One day playing chess, the boy who I'm talking about said God's name in vain, and after newly learning this Sunday School lesson, I told him what he was doing was blasphemy of the Holy Spirit, an unforgivable sin.

A few years later Dale died of a brain anyerism. Years later I finally learned that no, what Dale had a problem blurting out was not blasphemy of the Holy Spirit. The teacher either miscommunicated it to us kids, or I heard him wrong. But ever since then I felt conviction that maybe he died thinking he was going to hell.

I apologized to his family several years ago. Today I'm bringing this up to God. I don't deserve to be forgiven myself. But I have faith God will still forgive me as I've forgiven my friend - across the chasm.

Don't ever ever accuse and judge someone outside the faith. I had a nasty attitude, and I feel so rotten now for it. But I'm at the throne asking forgiveness myself.

I keep in mind, Luke 6:36-37

Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. Do not judge, and you will not be judged; and do not condemn, and you will not be condemned; pardon, and you will be pardoned.

 

[Blaine01]

You know God has forgiven you because of your repentance. Now you need to forgive yourself.

 

[srdenelsbeck]

Dale's final judgment rests not in your hands, but in the hands of the Almighty. Warning someone of the potential consequences of a sin is not a sin of its own. And there is no "unforgivable sin" that any man can identify because it is not our place as men to grant such forgiveness.

The gift of forgiveness through Christ absolves us of our sins if only we repent, seek forgiveness, accept Christ as our Savior, and endeavor to live a sinless life. It is through His Grace that we know salvation from our flaws.

We can only ever be truly free of the wickedness of others by forgiving them and by praying for them, that they might find the light and learn the true values of faith, hope, love, and forgiveness. That has to begin with us, presenting a "living prayer" of Christian life and grace. In this world, it's not always easy, but the Lord shines a light for each of us to follow every day if only we choose to open our eyes and see it.

In order to best understand and represent the salvation we attain in Christ's sacrifice, we must know that in God's forgiveness, we are to also forgive ourselves of our sins. We cannot offer the glory of God's Grace to others without first showing it to be true in our very own hearts.

Let go of the guilt you harbor and hand it over to God. If you know in your heart that you are forgiven, then forgiving yourself should be the next natural step. God's Grace is all you need to be free of your past.

God Bless.

 

[Emma677]

You must find a way to forgive yourself. Being unforgiving of yourself can leave you vulnerable to problems. Be merciful of yourself.

 

[ashout]

it wasn't really your fault was it? you thought you were being honest!

 

[laceyintulsa]

even though i know you realize god has forgiven u....and once he has forgiven you its wiped clean......being human is so hard...our own minds are a battlefield (joyce meyer) you need to forgive yourself for what happened.....and in time...it will get easier. i promise.