Dating question

[leothelioness]

Both guys and girls can answer this.

Guys, how would you as a Christian approach a girl you're interested in for a date? Girls, how have Christian guys approached you before for a date? How have you let the other person know that you were interested in them?

 

[Saucy]

Hmm, well I think I would talk to them for a bit and get to know them. I wouldn't immediately ask them on a date. I believe that if you ask someone on a date you don't really know, you're dating on looks only and I want to avoid that. So I'd get to know them for a bit. And if she showed signs of liking me in return and my feelings grew upon knowing her, I'd ask.

 

[ImperatorWall]

Don't date, wouldn't ask.

 

[leothelioness]

Thank you for your reply, Saucy.

Anybody else have any stories to share?

 

[PinkSweetart]

I've never been asked by a Christian guy, but if I'm interested I'm usually pretty shy around the person. Not like I-dont-talk-shy, but... I know it know. I just act differently and you can tell.

I also stare at the guy a lot and I'm usually caught smiling all the time if I'm around him. Oh, and I blush.

 

[Paulie079]

Well, I've only ever asked a girl out twice, and the first time I went about it the wrong way, but the second time around I was a little less clueless. Basically, what I did that second time and what I would do in the future is I would tell her how I feel about her (which obviously depends on how well I know her) and then ask her if she would like to go on a date with me. (There's a cute little story that goes with this too, but it's probably for a different thread at a different time.) If I felt it was necessary too, I'd be clear that I'm only focused on going on one date and going from there, in case she may feel as though going on one date might obligate her to go on more.

 

[ImperatorWall]

Well, I've only ever asked a girl out twice, and the first time I went about it the wrong way, but the second time around I was a little less clueless. Basically, what I did that second time and what I would do in the future is I would tell her how I feel about her (which obviously depends on how well I know her) and then ask her if she would like to go on a date with me. (There's a cute little story that goes with this too, but it's probably for a different thread at a different time.) If I felt it was necessary too, I'd be clear that I'm only focused on going on one date and going from there, in case she may feel as though going on one date might obligate her to go on more.

Nope, gotta tell the story now.

 

[TheUnforeseen]

I haven't done it myself yet. But theoretically, I would try and make friends with her and get to know her deeper. Meet her family (very important IMO) and then tell her I like her and ask her out on a date.

But I have told a few in the past that I really like them, alas, it was distance which was a barrier.

 

[William II]

I'd probably put my big-boy pants on and see if she wanted to grab dinner one night or a drink after work. Then again, I date girls that I know are already into me...so I haven't awkwardly asked a girl out.

 

[Blank123]

I'm not a very outgoing person so I don't invite a lot of conversation with guys I don't know. So really, the only men (aside from a couple of creeps who don't know the meaning of the words "no" or "restraining order") who have shown an interest in dating me have been guys I've already known on some level for a little bit. Typically I show an interest by taking an interest. I'm not big on overtly flirting, but when I make it a point to spend time with a guy to talk to him and get to know him... I'm likely interested.

If I really like a guy and I get to the point where I need to know where he stands so I can have some resolution and know once and for all how he feels, I will also just tell him directly so we can get it out in the open and just discuss it

 

[twnsrkr]

If she demonstrates that I have her attention, I'd just find a way to become acquainted indirectly if possible. Or I would go up to her when she was alone and not busy. Then start a conversation.

 

[RainWhisper]

I am blessed with a wonderful dating culture in church. The singles will pair up together to go on dates to encourage one another on regularly basis. This is to build stronger fellowship with one another. Pairing up with another couple helps us to be accountable to one another also.

Will just be myself, walk up to the girl (sister) and ask her for a date to get to know her more at a personal level. The unspoken rule is that if you date the same girl every month means you are dropping her a hint that you are interested in her.

 

[Sketcher]

I would take her aside and ask clearly, not leaving room for a vague answer. I would probably visibly hem and haw about this first to fight my natural shyness for a while, then do it. Before I would do so, I would spend some months or a year or more just observing her to see if she's someone I want to take things further with. This isn't admiring and pining, this is just observation and restraining myself until the crush wins out over the restraint.

And this hasn't worked yet. I'm open to suggestions for improvement.

 

[Going Merry]

Both guys and girls can answer this.

Guys, how would you as a Christian approach a girl you're interested in for a date? Girls, how have Christian guys approached you before for a date? How have you let the other person know that you were interested in them?

I just tell them or I ignore them

 

[anewday]

Both guys and girls can answer this.

Guys, how would you as a Christian approach a girl you're interested in for a date? Girls, how have Christian guys approached you before for a date? How have you let the other person know that you were interested in them?

They usually start talking to me then ask for my number. Then it goes from there...

If I'm interested, I say yes.

If a guy doesn't ask for my number...I usually drop hints...but most of the time that doesn't work...most guys I date make it obvious from the start if they are interested or not...plus it never works when I try to show interest in a guy where I'm not sure how he feels about me...

 

[m.a.r.X]

Both guys and girls can answer this.

Guys, how would you as a Christian approach a girl you're interested in for a date? Girls, how have Christian guys approached you before for a date? How have you let the other person know that you were interested in them?

I take my time, just want to make sure its the "right" choice.

If she has the right attributes.....and after the lots of searching (facebook, myspace, orkut and yeah, what kind of friends she have IRL), I would start smiling and say "hi" whenever the opportunity arises. Next would be starting a conversation and discovering her mental "framework", her standards, her faith, relationship with God and his Church.
If its all OK, then, I would be start talking about making a commitment and marriage......and if she's comfortable with this subject, then I would be making some cheesy jokes about us being together for life with lots of hidden "would you marry me" questions

Finally, if she's still finds time to spend with me, I'll pop THE question

 

[BlueJay83]

(SRS)

 

[Entered]

It depends on the context from which I know her. If it is through friends, I typically get to know her through the group and then approach her latter after we have passed the initial 'I think I recognize him phase' but before the 'he is a dear friend phase'. If it is on-line and/or professionally I am a lot more direct.

 

[dayhiker]

If I'm interested I just go ask if she would like to play golf or go dancing or go out to get a meal.

 

[RobertMerton]

Both guys and girls can answer this.

Guys, how would you as a Christian approach a girl you're interested in for a date? Girls, how have Christian guys approached you before for a date? How have you let the other person know that you were interested in them?

depends on how long i've known them, or how well i've known them. i'd probably flirt with them a little, and them say something like, 'what're you doing on friday/saturday/whatever day? ' nothing, why'? ' want to do something, just you and me? *wink*'.

it's important you say 'just you and me', so that the girl gets the whole idea.