Could you be in a relationship with someone illiterate?

[scraparcs]

By some circumstance, you meet someone who you enjoy spending time with and have gotten to know fondly. After spending some time with them and communicating with them, it becomes painfully clear that they are illiterate or functionally illiterate. It looks like they can read and write at about a fourth or sixth grade level. English is their first or one of their first languages and they graduated high school.

Can you establish a relationship with someone who has severely limited literacy skills? Would you do so?

 

[.Mikha'el.]

By some circumstance, you meet someone who you enjoy spending time with and have gotten to know fondly. After spending some time with them and communicating with them, it becomes painfully clear that they are illiterate or functionally illiterate. It looks like they can read and write at about a fourth or sixth grade level. English is their first or one of their first languages and they graduated high school.

Can you establish a relationship with someone who has severely limited literacy skills? Would you do so?

Never. I'm known for being an intellectual, so that would be a dealbreaker because it could never work. Around the end of last year, I was actually asked for a date by a female customer at work who's a semi-regular at the store. I turned her down because I couldn't even recall her name. Then she appeared in a video for the special needs group at church some months later, and I knew I had made the right move. I don't have anything personal against people with intellectual disabilities or illiteracy, but it's just not doable for a relationship.

 

[MehGuy]

Probably..

I don't like reading very much myself..

Reminds me, I remember being paired up with someone in high school to do a project and found out halfway through he couldn't read at all. I was shocked. How did he make it to 10th grade without being able to read.

Unless it was some act, but he still did his fair share of work.. I just had to read things for him.. lol..

 

[Lord Of The Forest]

My visceral response was an emphatic no, but then I remembered the remarkable transformation Jane Burden underwent when she married William Morris. It took work, but the low class and uneducated woman became a well read and well spoken woman whose mind was as distinguished as the paintings for which she was the model.

My answer would be yes, but it would be difficult at times... and it would be an instant deal killer if she was content and had no desire to improve her mental state.

 

[scraparcs]

Interesting variety of responses. I first thought no, then I thought how dare I say no and think yes, then I finally landed on "as long as we could text each other."

I'm not sure if it could work on a sustained basis without some changes. However, I've found my primary dating rule is often throw out all rules.

 

[Shattered-Reflections]

I could see how I might accept it, since my sister was a late learner. She's very intelligent she just has learning disabilities and it took her longer to learn and she still struggles but she can handle herself well enough. But if someone didn't take it on themselves to improve it might be a deal breaker. I don't think I'm patient enough and I don't really tolerate people being dependent on me. Marriage is a partnership, and I don't want ALL reading or writing to be my job. It becomes a bottle neck situation, which is stressful and inefficient.

 

[Neve]

No. I need someone who is on the same level as me intellectually. If illiteracy was a true defect, then it would probably be a dealbreaker for me.

 

[High Fidelity]

I think it might be slightly off-putting to a minor extent, but overall I don't think it'd be a problem.

So long as they could communicate adequately verbally, I can't see why it'd be too much cause for concern.

If I was that fussed about the literacy skills of another person, I'd avoid the internet entirely lol.

 

[redblue22]

I would be fine with someone who struggled with reading. Most people I meet struggle with literacy and that's ok. It might be sexy to hear her dialect.

.

 

[Nanopants]

I don't know how that would work out. It would probably mean she has a mental disability, and I just don't know if I could commit to that relationship. If it's dyslexia or something not too serious, then probably yes.

 

[High Fidelity]

I don't know how that would work out. It would probably mean she has a mental disability, and I just don't know if I could commit to that relationship. If it's dyslexia or something not too serious, then probably yes.

Indeed. I'm dyslexic and I couldn't really see it impairing my ability in a relationship.

 

[Isambard]

Most people are illiterate in most things. So sure. Why not?

 

[psalms 91]

By some circumstance, you meet someone who you enjoy spending time with and have gotten to know fondly. After spending some time with them and communicating with them, it becomes painfully clear that they are illiterate or functionally illiterate. It looks like they can read and write at about a fourth or sixth grade level. English is their first or one of their first languages and they graduated high school.

Can you establish a relationship with someone who has severely limited literacy skills? Would you do so?

Absolutely, some of the nicest people I have ever met were devolopmentally challanged.

 

[yuppers]

I don tink I could, I ain't the gratist speller ethr

 

[Ubuntu]

Nope, I'm a notorious bookworm. Out of the question!

 

[Toro]

Fully developed mentally as an adult - Yes. I would try to teach her, but just cause she cant read doesn't instantly make her stupid. Maybe she was forced to move around a lot as a kid, missed being taught reading, but never wanted to say "I cant read" out of embarrassment and just found ways to adapt.

Assuming that someone that can't read is stupid, is like saying anyone who drops out of high school/college or didn't go to college is stupid. Yet, some of the most celebrated "brilliant" minds of this age either dropped out of highschool/college such as Steve Jobs and Bill Gates just to start.

If finishing high school and college are the ONLY deciding factors of intelligence. Explain George Bush and Obama..... also the millions of other examples outside of politics.

If she were not developed mentally as an adult - No.

 

[m.a.r.X]

Can't read?
Wut!

 

[Orange Crow]

It honestly will take me a whole lot of efford and time to accept it. I personally like to have people around me that literate. For example, when I'm texting somebody but I know the person is illiterate, the way they text and create sentences sometimes irritates me because I notice things spelled wrong. I'm not correcting it but it irritates me that much that I just don't like it. If I reply with a sentence, that is a little more complex, they sometimes don't understand the point I'm trying to make so I have to put more efford into it to get people to reply with some 'normal' answers that I'm happy with.

Does this make sense to you? lol

 

[Toro]

Can't read?
Wut!

Yes, learn from Norris.

 

[MarkSB]

I agree w/Toro.