Confused

[Leanna]

Actually, I think you have to walk a fine line here.

If a person remarries, let's say, and they are convicted that it is an adulterous relationship, are you suggesting that they divorce that person (which God HATES)? Thereby breaking a covenant that the person entered into, even if they've done so via adultery?

You might be trading one sin for another sin... which is worse in that situation? Which one will NOT test God's grace?

I don't think it's wise that a person who has divorced and remarried to divorce again. I cannot, at this point, back this up biblically. It just seems like a pandora's box.

I firmly believe that if one has divorced, he/she should avoid sin by not remarrying. But to suggest that person should divorce... I don't know... I need more evidence and argument on that one.

This is what I have been trying to say but have been ignored. I don't see how divorcing a second wife is right. I also don't believe that God would not allow this person any way of coming to Him.

 

[SirKenin]

This is what I have been trying to say but have been ignored. I don't see how divorcing a second wife is right. I also don't believe that God would not allow this person any way of coming to Him.

You haven't been ignored. Your question has been answered plain as day, you just didn't get the answer you wanted to hear. You were hoping to box me into a corner, rather than observe Biblical truths.

Nobody said you can't come to Him. See, I don't think you're hearing what it is I'm trying to say at all. Of course you can come to Him, but don't expect to come to Him day after day after day with the same sin of adultery from the same situation and expect God to bless you. The Bible shows us that isn't going to happen. The Bible also tells us what happens to adulterers/adulteresses.

Come to God all you want, certainly His arms are open and waiting. What the Bible tells us is that we are expected to change our behaviours or we will reap what we sew.

 

[bkg]

The basis for that comment is that we are permitted to divorce in the case of adultery. Marrying someone who did not divorce for Biblical reasons is committing adultery, and it causes that person to commit adultery. (Matt 19) Adulterers/Adulteresses will not inherit the Kingdom of Heaven (1 Cor 6)

True

So, the way I see it, there would be Biblical grounds for leaving that person and returning to a life of celibacy or whatever your situation warrants to adhere to Biblical principals. I don't believe that you would be sinning in that case. I can see no evidence to the contrary. Not from what I can see in the Bible.

Not sure on that one. I do believe it would still be a sin to divorce. I have to do more research on that, I believe, but it would go against God's commands for divorce. We are "permitted" to divorce in teh case of adultery, we are not TOLD to divorce in teh case of adultery. I think it's a double edged sword.

Which is worse? Divorcing to adhere to Biblical principals, or living in a state of perpetual sin, testing God and falling out of God's grace?

Divorcing doesn't really adhere to Biblical principals, even in the case of adultery. It still goes against God's strong words "I hate divorce", regardless of the cause.

I think it's an interesting conversation, none-the-less. And one that could spark many a long nights discussions. You essentially, as I see it, have to pick a side - stay in the marriage knowing there is adultery, or divorce and violate God's commands that way. Either one is a sin.

That begs the question (for me at least), is a person then permited to divorce the 2nd spouse and go back to the 1st spouse? This also has arguments on both sides of the coin....

 

[SirKenin]

/me 's head explodes

 

[SirKenin]

I think it's an interesting conversation, none-the-less. And one that could spark many a long nights discussions. You essentially, as I see it, have to pick a side - stay in the marriage knowing there is adultery, or divorce and violate God's commands that way. Either one is a sin.

Divorce isn't a sin if given the two specific reasons allowed for in the Bible.

That begs the question (for me at least), is a person then permited to divorce the 2nd spouse and go back to the 1st spouse? This also has arguments on both sides of the coin....

I'm not sure of this one, but that certainly would give just cause to bitterness on behalf of your second spouse and I simply wouldn't recommend it. I think a life of celibacy would be the appropriate course of action to take.

What would Jesus do (besides not fall into that trap to begin with)? Do you really think he would persist in a life of adultery? I don't.

 

[charligirl]

http://www.youth.co.za/papers/divorce.htm

Thought I would throw this into the mix, definately worth a read in light of this discussion.

 

[Leanna]

You haven't been ignored. Your question has been answered plain as day, you just didn't get the answer you wanted to hear. You were hoping to box me into a corner, rather than observe Biblical truths.

Nobody said you can't come to Him. See, I don't think you're hearing what it is I'm trying to say at all. Of course you can come to Him, but don't expect to come to Him day after day after day with the same sin of adultery from the same situation and expect God to bless you. The Bible shows us that isn't going to happen. The Bible also tells us what happens to adulterers/adulteresses.

Come to God all you want, certainly His arms are open and waiting. What the Bible tells us is that we are expected to change our behaviours or we will reap what we sew.

You are obviously feeling threatened because you keep saying things like "you are trying to box me in a corner" blah blah blah. We will just have to disagree on what is a Biblical truth. What you are suggesting is more sin and more pain for all parties involved. Over and out now.

 

[SirKenin]

You are obviously feeling threatened because you keep saying things like "you are trying to box me in a corner" blah blah blah. We will just have to disagree on what is a Biblical truth. What you are suggesting is more sin and more pain for all parties involved. Over and out now.

I don't feel threatened at all. I feel quite comfortable with my beliefs, as a matter of fact. They come after many hours of studying for myself, rather than allowing some organized religion to pump me full of dogma, bias and agendas.

Now, with that said, if you read the Bible and had read the article that charligirl pointed to (albeit it has bias and some details that do not agree with current scholarly thinking), you would notice that divorcing under certain conditions is not a sin.

It might be painful, but nobody guaranteed that doing what is right is easy. Besides, if you studied the Bible you wouldn't have got yourself into that painful position to begin with. Right?

If you wish to disagree, that's fine.

 

[~Nikki~]

Sorry about this, but I just wrote this post for another thread and it seemed to suit this thread quite well too so I have to admit that I've just copied and pasted it in here rather than writing it all again.

Please beware!

Though the Bible does give provision for separation, and sometimes a person's husband/wife will divorce them, nowhere does the Bible state that remarriage is acceptable. In fact the Bible says that remarriage is adultery. Paul does say in the letter to the Corinthians that if a husband and wife separate then it either needs to be with a view to reconciliation or they must remain unmarried.

I know that people say that some verses seem to imply that remarriage is ok, but nowhere is it stated in black and white that remarriage is ok. However there are plenty of verses which categorically state that remarriage is adultery and that we are not to commit adultery.

People may say that it's ok because God is forgiving, but a pre-requisite for God's forgiveness is repentance, and repentance means to acknowledge that you are sinning and to turn away from it and not to do it anymore (admit it and quit it). How can a person remarry and ask God's forgiveness yet carry on as they are?

When we marry for the first time God makes us one flesh with our husband/wife for as long as both are still living. How then, can we ever be made one flesh with someone else when we're already one flesh with our first marriage partner, and in God's eyes we will be until one partner is no longer alive...

Also, marriage is a picture of Christ's relationship with the church. If we are allowed to divorce and remarry, then surely this means that Jesus can divorce us if He wants to??? Just a thought...

The Bible says that marriage is a covenant and not a contract that you can break if one partner lets the other down. A covenant cannot be broken, but can only be violated. And even if one partner violates the covenant and leaves, the other can still decide to be faithful to the vows they made...that they will love and be faithful (etc) to that person as long as they both live.

The Bible says it's better not to vow, than to make a vow and not fulfill it.
Ecclesiastes 5:4-5 'When you make a vow to God, do not delay to pay it; for He has no pleasure in fools. Pay what you have vowed - better not to vow than to vow and not pay.'

Anyway, these are just a few thoughts. I'm not saying these things in order to judge anyone and I know that this is a very sensitive subject and that emotions run high when talking about this sort of thing, but I truly believe we need to be faithful to God's Word and adjust our thinking to fit in with what the Bible says, rather than try to adjust what the Bible says in order to make it fit in with our thinking. Staying single may be the hardest thing a person ever has to do, but God will always give us the strength to do what is right if we decide to obey Him no matter what. Remember that the Bible says 'not everyone who says to me "Lord, Lord," will enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven'. And in 1 John 2:4 it says 'He who says, "I know Him," and does not keep His commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him.' Quite a dangerous position to be in!

I'm not saying that people must agree with this because it's my opinion; rather they must look at it for themselves and not think about how they feel about the subject, but honestly seek what God says on the subject, and then do what He says. I know it may seem unfair but God created us and He made the rules...

Love and prayers...

In Him

 

[~Nikki~]

Quote:

Originally Posted by: Leanna

This is what I have been trying to say but have been ignored. I don't see how divorcing a second wife is right. I also don't believe that God would not allow this person any way of coming to Him.



What if the second marriage is only a marriage in the eyes of the world? What if in God's eyes it's not a marriage.

Adultery means a married person having sex outside of marriage. How then a remarried person be commiting adultery unless God still sees them as one flesh with their first marriage partner, and sees them as having sex outside of that marriage? How can man separate what God has joined? He can't. God still sees them as joined to their first partners and therefore any other relationship is considered by God as extra-marital and therefore adulterous...

Just a thought...

 

[ElizabethanLady]

All of this "is this a sin?" and "will this send me to hell" stuff is scary.
I am so grateful for God's grace and for the blood of Jesus.

I am so unworthy myself.

It sickens me sometimes.

I'm glad God looks on our HEARTS, and not outward appearances. I've done things that were wrong, but for the right reasons (i.e., to give my kids a better life, etc.)

I have nothing to hold onto except Jesus, but I can't think of anyone else I would rather hold onto...this probably doesn't make much sense but all of this controversy about adultery and marriage, remarriage, etc., is very confusing to me.