Both a man or woman needs to learn how to fulfill their role as a husband or wife long before they say "I do" at the wedding ceremony, that they are "past the bloom of youth" even before dating.(1 Cor 7:36) This is where parents are to teach their children how to become responsible adults.(see Deut 6:6-9 about inculcating God's guidelines in their children)
But sadly many parents are themselves disorganized as well as having bad habits, smoking, abuse of alcohol, leaving tools, clothes, and dishes just anywhere without putting them away in the proper place (cleaning them up for the next use), using unclean language that is part their normal speech, wives disrespecting their husbands (see Prov 19:13 concerning being a "quarrelsome wife") while husbands being both verbally and physically abusive or just lazy.(see Prov 26:13-15 concerning the lazy one who is like a "door turning on its hinge" as the lazy in his bed)
Before marriage, Proverbs 24 says that both parties (especially the man) are to "prepare your outside work, and get everything ready in the field; then build your house (or family)".(Prov 24:27) Being mentally and physically prepared (a man having obtained a "home" as well as transportation, etc), with the woman having a submissive attitude towards her future husband as a "complement" to him, because he is one that has obtained respect due to his integrity and moral cleanness, his consideration for her desires and feelings, his willingness to be head of the house in a Christ-like way and yet both work together as "one flesh".(Gen 2:24; Matt 19:4-6)
Again sadly, the above is, for the most part, untrue for many married couples, for often they enter marriage without any knowledge or desire to really want to make a marriage work. That is why so many marriages fail. For wives, Proverbs 31 outlines what makes for a "good wife", which is far more than just being "good" sexually.
Proverbs 18 says that "the one who finds a good wife has found something good, and he receives Jehovah's (God's personal name) favor".(Prov 18:22) Proverbs 19 says that "a house and wealth are inherited from fathers (being passed on from father to son in some cases), but a discreet wife is from Jehovah".(Prov 19:14)
A "good wife" is one that is "capable", being organized, able to make good judgment calls on what to buy (or not to buy), "discreet" in her careful use of words as well as activities, being considerate of others views and feelings that does not correlate with hers.(Prov 31:10) A "good wife" is one that the husband places trust in, knowing that he will not be disappointed, rewarding him "with good, not bad, all the days of her life".(Prov 31:11, 12)
"She delights to work with her hands", being a diligent worker and not lazy.(Prov 31:13) "She also rises while it is still night, providing food for her household".(Prov 31:15) A "good wife" is willing to rise early to make breakfast for her family (or any other time necessary), not being a complainer.
"She prepares herself for hard work", ready to take on any needed task at hand.(Prov 31:17) "She watches over the activity of her household, and the bread of laziness she does not eat".(Prov 31:27) She gets tired, but takes a moment of rest and then go back to her "hard work", for marriage and raising a family is indeed "hard work".
The 32 page brochure entitled "Your Family Can Be Happy" (at JW dot org) provides to the point and detailed information on how to make a marriage happy, with topics such as "Look to God for a Happy Marriage", "Be Loyal to Each Other", "How to Solve Problems", How to Manage Money", "How to Keep Peace With Your Relatives", "How Babies Change a Marriage", "How to Educate Your Child", "When Tragedy Strikes", and last but not least "Worship Jehovah as a Family".
