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"I know it's an annoying question" I say, whilst peeling the label off my beer bottle "but what do you do for a living?"
"I'm a nurse" she says: "though I'm mainly a phlebotomist, I'm still in uni."
"Oh nice" I sit up straight to adjust, then peer at her though a lowered - and somewhat amorous gaze: "yeah my mother is a nurse. Honestly, it's just such an admirable job; and one that's most certainly not about the money, you have my respect there."
"Aww thank you" she says, as she twizzles her ear ring between her thumb and forefinger: "I do love it though, so it's not all bad."
"I bet you have your favourite patients don't you?" I reply: "I know my mother does."
"Oh yes" she answers, whilst looking at me with a serene smile: "those patients make it all so worth it."
*Pleasant silence: taking a mental note of body language cues. Playing with hair? Tick! Torso facing me? Tick! Mirroring my gestures? Tick! Okay, let's go in.
"So, are you up for something to eat? I know a nice little place by the river where the food is great and the ambience is marvellous."
"Yeah, sounds great!" She leaps up out of her chair wearing the most buoyant smile: "we're new here you see, we'd love the chance to check out some restaurants and do a bit of exploring."
"Eh?" I screw my face and scratch my head: "is there a mouse in your pocket? Who's we?"
"My wife, oh here she comes now..." The woman reaches out to embrace another woman - a woman with a crew cut, waistcoat and a cuban cigar hanging out of her mouth: "Owite mate!" She says with an affirming thumbs up.
"Tonya, this is Pete - he's going to take us out for dinner"
"Sound as a pound" says Tonya: "I'm so hungry I could eat my own earwax, let's get it on."
A dramatisation of an ALMOST true story. Moral of the story, NEVER assume anything - not ever lol.
*Edit. Okay, I'll fess up. I've asked out two women in my time who had wives.
Roast me, I deserve it.
Also, my name is not Pete. (Or Reese)
Aww, thanks for the compliment.
I was actually referring to that person over there.Aww, thanks for the compliment.
Ironically, so does ice cream.You'll be fine.
After all, time heals all wounds.
Excuse me, but not all ice cream heals.Ironically, so does ice cream.
Ba dum tss
Excuse me, but not all ice cream heals.
Cookie Dough Ice Cream or even Panda Paws will do the job.
But, Neopolitan? No thank you.
I may have just did a very loud audible gasp as I read your response.Completely agree about Cookie Dough, but what is Panda Paws?
I may have just did a very loud audible gasp as I read your response.
Let me enlighten you, friend.
Panda Paws is vanilla ice cream with peanut butter cups with swirls of thick fudge.
*drools*
What ice cream do YOU like?
Excuse me, but not all ice cream heals.
I asked a boy to a dance, I was 13. We had a fun night he was kind and dressed nice and was good at dancing. We kissed at the end at the night, and he was terrible at the kiss and I learned the next year he was gay.
That was my first Kiss.
I had a long time to be ok with that.
Never assume anything.
Pete maybe you read the room wrong and they looked for a boyfriend. You and Tonya could have become. Good. Friends.
This will be my best line YET.
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