Can't Please Parents

[Gentle Lamb]

Commendable that you want to honor your parents.

If you have never been responsible for a home, it is difficult to realize all that goes into it. Try to give yourself a reality check. Take note of what you are doing, how long it takes you and how complete you are doing what is asks of you. Compare tasks others do, the length of time it takes them and how well the assignments are accomplished. If they asks you to clean the kitchen floor, do you sweep the most traffic areas or do you remove the rugs, etc and really sweep every inch? Do you dislike being told? Then asks for a list. It would help you see what they expect and the timeframe they have in mind. Also, if you spend time on your phone while doing a task, it may look 30 min to do but just a 5-10 min chore.

Also, our goal was to educate our sons before they left home. They knew how to plan meals, purchase food, cook, budgeting, etc. What about taking initiative without having to be told? That shows maturity.

Not saying that too much is expected of you or not - just trying to help you see more sides to the situation.

You are right, it is difficult for me to understand things from the perspective of my parents because I've never had my own home to manage or my own family to raise. I manage my own finances pretty well. But I try to help as much as I can financially and with the general upkeep. Taking initiative can be difficult, but I will try to do what I can.

 

[Gentle Lamb]

When you can look at your parents through Jesus's eyes, then there have come much change upon you. As He is changing you more to look at them with love and tenderness, forgiving them as God has forgiven you through Christ.

This is what I need to learn. To look at them through the eyes of Jesus. May God help me in that area. I know I need to pray for my family, it has just been difficult (though I do pray for them!) because of the situation. But I pray that God will help me.

 

[Gentle Lamb]

Why do you think you cannot please your parents? Is there something that you desire to do or they want you to do? Parents are so special to us as children, however, it can be hard to live with them at times because they may not see you as an adult. I think the best and only thing you can do is do your best to get on your feet, respect your parents by helping around the house proactively, supporting them financially ( even if it is a little), try to listen to what they have to say ( may be able to provide wisdom) have a spirit of gratitude and love, and just be optimist things will get better. I pray that everything works out in your favor.

That is a big part of the problem, never being taught to be an adult. I was oversheltered and overprotected which backfired terribly, I became very rebellious because much of the parenting was done without love. Yes, I do have to try to get on my feet, you are right. I am trying, may God help me. I do try to listen to them... I have to filter out the bad advice from the good though. Yes, I do need to have a spirit of gratitude and love, you are right. I've realized that there is nothing idealistic about being a Christian, meaning that there is no ideal dream scene that we enter into. God changes us and that is what makes us able to love where people are unloveable and makes us able to bear the burdens our lives. Thank you for the input, it helps for me to have advice from people of other perspectives, it helps me to put my situation in perspective.