God has to come first before anything else. My priority list is, God first, family next, employment after that, church last. I told my wife that God comes first in my life and family next. I don't think she liked hearing that, but that is my stand. At the same time, important life decisions must be made in the "committee of two", involve my wife and me. If we are not in total agreement, neither of us go ahead in it. I wanted to be a minister some years ago, and my wife said to me, "I didn't marry you to become and minster's wife!" So that settled it, because ministry would not work for me if I disregarded her and went ahead. Yet, over the years I became an elder of the church, and now as the senior elder in our church without a minister, I am effectively doing the pastor's role, and my wife doesn't object. You see, God works things out, but not in the exact way we would expect.
In putting God first, I must remain true to my prophetic calling. I am a tongues-speaking full-gospel believer who prays for the sick and casts out demons. My wife has told me that Pentecostalism is not her cup of tea, but she does not prevent me being who I am in Christ. For example, my daughter when she was 16 was being baptised in a local AOG church. I asked, as her father, to be able to give an Abrahamic blessing prophecy over her, and they agreed. So I did. Now my wife had never heard me pray in tongues before. She was standing right beside me when I laid my hand on my daughter's head and started, but it came out as a tongues message. I was thinking, "I'm for it now!" Then I gave the interpretation and it was a wonderful, encouraging prophecy over what God thought of her and His desire for her life. My wife made no comment at all, and she didn't divorce me on the spot!
In that service, people were speaking in tongues all over the place, and she turned to me with eyes like saucers and asked, "Are those people speaking in tongues?" I said, "Yep!" And that was it. On the way home, that was when she said that Pentecostalism was not her cup of tea, and I respect that. There is no conflict over religion in our home. She had a Roman Catholic background and she has greatly helped me understand their theology. Although she won't participate in the worship services in my Presbyterian church, she is friends with all the people there, and fully involves herself in the social side of the church.
I love her and accept her as she is, and she loves me the same. I don't think I would leave my church and go to a Pentecostal one, even though I am full-gospel, because my wife would not be happy, and any decision like that would have to involve the "committee of two." So, when it is my turn to preach (about once a month), I preach full-gospel, and (miraculously) the members lap it up. I think it is because I am making a stand about what I believe in Christ, but I am not trying to force change on them. I believe that when it comes time for a change toward the full-gospel God will do it, and when He does, it will be done right!
I hope that is encouraging to anyone who feels the same conflict at home. Remember, a man shall cleave to his wife and the two become one flesh, and shall leave his and her father and mother. Many conflicts come through interference from family, especially the wife or husband's parents who cannot let go of their controlling attitude.
