Dave-W

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I will use this threat to get her to sign the divorce papers.
Instead, I would talk to your pastor first, an set up some time to confront her on it with the pastor present. The point is to get her to actually face up to her sin and repent.
 
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RaymondG

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Kind of convenient of you to wait until you are well enough to be on your own, to kick the wife to the curb.... Who was it that took care of you the years you couldn't take care of yourself? Was it your wife? If so, would you so easily go behind her back to push her out the door.....Is it so easy to listen to the advise of strangers who encourage you to do what you want to do already?

How many people told her to just leave you....that you would never get better, you would never come around.......she is wasting her time taking care of you? Did she listen to them?

I say, do what you want done to you; and take what we say lightly.....your future is determined by what you do now.

I think it wise to let her know you know everything, and give her the choice to stop and stay, or leave and continue.... God gives us a choice to believe and live, or not believe and die......and he never take away this option because of the sin we commit....and Thank God he is merciful....so I will, likewise, be merciful to others.
 
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Danoded

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Kind of convenient of you to wait until you are well enough to be on your own, to kick the wife to the curb.... Who was it that took care of you the years you couldn't take care of yourself? Was it your wife? If so, would you so easily go behind her back to push her out the door.....Is it so easy to listen to the advise of strangers who encourage you to do what you want to do already?

How many people told her to just leave you....that you would never get better, you would never come around.......she is wasting her time taking care of you? Did she listen to them?

I say, do what you want done to you; and take what we say lightly.....your future is determined by what you do now.

I think it wise to let her know you know everything, and give her the choice to stop and stay, or leave and continue.... God gives us a choice to believe and live, or not believe and die......and he never take away this option because of the sin we commit....and Thank God he is merciful....so I will, likewise, be merciful to others.

This isn't a serious post, right?
 
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RaymondG

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This isn't a serious post, right?
I know...this is a christian site......so I should only condemn, throw stones and send to hell. If you have objections or a better way, state them.....questions like these arent helpful and make threads unnecessarily long.
 
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Danoded

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I know...this is a christian site......so I should only condemn, throw stones and send to hell. If you have objections or a better way, state them.....questions like these arent helpful and make threads unnecessarily long.

Your post just doesn't make any sense to me. OP was in a coma for two years and his wife decides to dishonour herself and playing the part of a harlot by commuting adultery with another man. She does not seek to repentance and hasn't even apologised for what she has done. I'm not saying whether or not he should get a divorce, but one thing I know is that he is the innocent party here.
 
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RaymondG

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Your post just doesn't make any sense to me. OP was in a coma for two years and his wife decides to dishonour herself and playing the part of a harlot by commuting adultery with another man. She does not seek to repentance and hasn't even apologised for what she has done. I'm not saying whether or not he should get a divorce, but one thing I know is that he is the innocent party here.
Jesus was innocent yet died on the cross for your sins. Since knowing this....have you sinned again or did you become perfect? If you have sinned again after knowing what Christ did for you, should He divorce you and not give you anymore chances......sense He is innocent? Should he make you believe you have a chance and things are normal, while behind your back planning to cut you off?

which ever side you fall on is fine with me.....because you are the one who has to reap what you have sown.

Taking care of the sick is a hard job......the cleaning, feeding, changing.....this can drive one insane....Thank God for the good nurses. It would be unwise to forget all the good and just focus on the bad. I would give her the choice to stay or leave, knowing the evidence.....if she chose to leave, I would forgive her and thank her deeply for helping to take care of me when i couldnt take care of myself. and would wish her nothing but joy and happiness for the rest of her days.

Then I would get excited waiting for what God has in store for me next......as ALL things work together for my good.
 
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adriw7878

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Kind of convenient of you to wait until you are well enough to be on your own, to kick the wife to the curb.... Who was it that took care of you the years you couldn't take care of yourself? Was it your wife? If so, would you so easily go behind her back to push her out the door.....Is it so easy to listen to the advise of strangers who encourage you to do what you want to do already?

How many people told her to just leave you....that you would never get better, you would never come around.......she is wasting her time taking care of you? Did she listen to them?

I say, do what you want done to you; and take what we say lightly.....your future is determined by what you do now.

I think it wise to let her know you know everything, and give her the choice to stop and stay, or leave and continue.... God gives us a choice to believe and live, or not believe and die......and he never take away this option because of the sin we commit....and Thank God he is merciful....so I will, likewise, be merciful to others.
Of course I appreciated her care and concerns very much ... had 2 heart2heart chats with her to stop her affair, repent and we work on our relationship back again. (Got PI report of her affair, with pics ... she didn't know I have this). Instead, she turned around to me (and to her siblings) and said "You are a sick and despicable man !". She kept going out to her affairs three times (Wed-Fri) per week ... claiming merger coming soon - lots of work. What a load of s..t !
 
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Almost there

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I will use this threat to get her to sign the divorce papers.
Actually, I'm big on "letting the non-believer leave". That is what happened with my first wife of 20 years.

This should be exposed as one poster said. Likely, what will happen is that she will divorce you to stay with your best friend, and he'll probably divorce his wife too. The other possibility is that both of them, after being exposed, come to their senses and renew their faith and return to the fold, like it happens in Christian movies.

But those are the only two "positive" answers and both start with the full exposure as the other poster said.

And both really are positive, though the first one will sting a bit at first.
 
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RaymondG

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Of course I appreciated her care and concerns very much ... had 2 heart2heart chats with her to stop her affair, repent and we work on our relationship back again. (Got PI report of her affair, with pics ... she didn't know I have this). Instead, she turned around to me (and to her siblings) and said "You are a sick and despicable man !". She kept going out to her affairs three times (Wed-Fri) per week ... claiming merger coming soon - lots of work. What a load of s..t !
I see only talk of the actions she deserve and what you plan to give her as a result of her bad actions. I heard nothing concerning the actions she deserve and what you gave her for the good she has done. Not that there is anything wrong with that.

This is not about to divorce or not to divorce....it is about loving your neighbor as thyself.....If you cant do it for someone who took care of you......how can you love an enemy?

In this case, I would show the evidence and let her decide to stay or leave......I wouldnt hid evidence and use it as blackmail to get someone to sign papers. I wouldnt do this to an enemy, nor one who gave 2 years of their life to take care of me. why? Because this is not something I want done to me in the future...in business relationships or personal.
 
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adriw7878

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I see only talk of the actions she deserve and what you plan to give her as a result of her bad actions. I heard nothing concerning the actions she deserve and what you gave her for the good she has done. Not that there is anything wrong with that.

This is not about to divorce or not to divorce....it is about loving your neighbor as thyself.....If you cant do it for someone who took care of you......how can you love an enemy?

In this case, I would show the evidence and let her decide to stay or leave......I wouldnt hid evidence and use it as blackmail to get someone to sign papers. I wouldnt do this to an enemy, nor one who gave 2 years of their life to take care of me. why? Because this is not something I want done to me in the future...in business relationships or personal.
Hi Raymond,
Thanks for your comments. As for our relationship, I bought all assets under her name (car & house) and had a joint account with her. Initially, we had a loving relationship .... monetary wise no issue (just take from joint account). She does have her own account (healthy balance) and I have never ask for a dime from her.
What surprised me initially from 'seeing' a new person, was she kept asking me to transfer all my cash from private account to her for 'safe keeping'? Thank God, I told her "I will get to it when I am better." No wonder she acted loving in public and once home ... off to the bedroom .... sometime locked the bathroom to do her messages. Never let me touch her in the bed. She sleep with bolster separating us. When I turn to caress her, she would hug a pillow tight (with back to me). What do you think she thinks I don't know?
 
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His wife knew he had other affairs and tolerated him because of the children.
That is sad to hear. What the hurry for either to divorce. If they can be married and cheat with each other.
 
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