BPD fellowship thread

[goldenviolet]

we got our forum!! i picture lots of cyber hugs in this room. i love ya all!! dee

 

[Mayflower1]

I haven't heard of BPD before. What is it exactly? You'll should get a ribbon for it now!!! You know, the memorial ribbons like SI and Depression!

 

[Daysoni]

People with Border line Personality often experience repetitive patterns of disorganization, instability in self-image, moods, behaviors, and close personal relationships. They can be bright and intelligent. Also can appaers warm, friendly, and competent. Until our defence structure crumbles.

 

[Soulwings]

Ive been diagnosed with features of BPD; Im missing a few of the DSM-IV criteria.
Another symptom is chronic emptiness. And anger.

everyone.

 

[goldenviolet]

's lovely works of art, from the Master Artist!

 

[Theresasjourney]

Kewl~~
I was browsing the CF start page area checking out the forums and this caught my eye.
I was dxed with BPD about 15/20 yrs ago.
My raging anger is lots better then it was several yrs ago.
I still have problems with emotionally connecting to people~~sigh. Etc~`
Its nice to find this here~~I'll be back.

 

[bvwsmaker]

People with Border line Personality often experience repetitive patterns of disorganization, instability in self-image, moods, behaviors, and close personal relationships. They can be bright and intelligent. Also can appaers warm, friendly, and competent. Until our defence structure crumbles.

Yep. Sounds very familiar.

 

[Soulwings]

Does anyone here ever get that empty feeling (as I mentioned above), like a black hole inside of you? Its there now, and although this sounds really weird if you havent experienced it, its as if its pulling everything good away, so there isnt anything left but self hate, anger, disgust, self loathing. Right between my shoulders is where its centered. And its making me feel so ... lost. Empty. Except for that fire of negative thoughts.

 

[Theresasjourney]

Does anyone here ever get that empty feeling (as I mentioned above), like a black hole inside of you? Its there now, and although this sounds really weird if you havent experienced it, its as if its pulling everything good away, so there isnt anything left but self hate, anger, disgust, self loathing. Right between my shoulders is where its centered. And its making me feel so ... lost. Empty. Except for that fire of negative thoughts.

I feel empty all the time~~black hole is a mix of BPD and depression. I am on meds for depression so currently I don't get sucked into black holes but I been there plenty of times. Its an awful place to be..;o/
when that way~ I would try and do lots of selfcare~~self nuturing~~rest~`pray~walking. There is no pat answer~~~;o/

 

[Soulwings]

Theresa. Thank you for your reply.

Im on meds for depression as well, but the black hole still happens. Not as bad as it used to, but its... still there. Its as though nothing matters anymore.

s for everyone.

 

[Theresasjourney]

Theresa. Thank you for your reply.

Im on meds for depression as well, but the black hole still happens. Not as bad as it used to, but its... still there. Its as though nothing matters anymore.

s for everyone.

Have you ever had any therapy for your BPD? There are underlying reasons for BPD~~that once worked on they are not nearly as intense~~
I hear you in that its very hard right now~~;o/ I understand and I care~~k

 

[Soulwings]

Im in therapy right now for depression/self harm/anxiety/OCD, and weve touched on BPD, but as Im not clinically diagnosed with it (dont fulfill all of the criteria) its not been a main focus.

 

[Theresasjourney]

I think you will find that as you work on the underlying pain issues you have that it will in turn lesson the intensity of the BPD syptoms you do have~~
Its painful work working on deep deep pain that has us act out ~~out of our pain. I remember from all my yrs of therapy~`
here and caring~~

 

[Soulwings]

Thank you. It is hard and painful work trying to figure out what makes me like I am, but ... eventually (hopefully) Ill be able to iron it all out and grow from it. I dont understand "why me" ... and I hate how I am most of the time ... but maybe God has a reason for it?

 

[Theresasjourney]

Your not alone in how you feel~~sometimes I think I will forever feel like a freak who can't get anything right~~
then allot of the times I get how I am and I am a miracle and God loves me and understands me and I am still in process~~

 

[Theresasjourney]

I was just reading about the~Psychological age of BPDs?
I wonder what age I am stuck at~~sometimes I think 7 mostly I think 12~~

 

[Theresasjourney]

How does one post a poll here in CF/

 

[Soulwings]

Aww You arent a freak. I know what you mean, though, and I feel like that sometimes as well. You are always a miracle, even when you dont feel it, and youve just got to remember that. I need to also.

How do you determine psychological age?

And Im not sure about creating a poll. Hmm.

 

[Theresasjourney]

Aww You arent a freak. I know what you mean, though, and I feel like that sometimes as well. You are always a miracle, even when you dont feel it, and youve just got to remember that. I need to also.

How do you determine psychological age?

And Im not sure about creating a poll. Hmm.

So far I haven't found a test for determining psyc age~~I think the best way is when you pulled into a BPD sate to stop and ask yourself how old you feel~~BPD are emotionally stuck at a certain age.
Mentally and IQ wise I function as my chronilogical age~~but when pulled big time into deep painful feelings I am 12~~lol
Maybe a mod here will let me know how to do a poll~~do you think they are here?

 

[Soulwings]

I see what you mean. Like when you dissociate or something, how old you feel then. Last night was bad ... definitely felt like I was four. :o



I think the mods are around somewhere. Hmm.
/me peeks around for Dee