Being Single...

[~HopeFloats~]

What do you enjoy about it?

What do you NOT enjoy about it?

I am really getting tired of being single yet so scared of being vulnerable to another person..

I know I am not alone and many people like I struggle daily too..

Any words of wisdom?

 

[Sketcher]

I honestly enjoy not being vunerable to another person. I don't see myself giving that up anytime soon.

 

[~HopeFloats~]

Interesting, I want that connection , the type where I feel loved respected.. yet scared to open myself to that..

 

[Pyrogenesis]

Yea, I've let myself be vulnerable to someone before. Didn't work out so great...

I like my walls and I like being single, but there's something missing too. I want someone to love, protect and cherish, but I know that in order to be worthy of that I would have to be vulnerable to them. That's something I just can't do, so I guess I'm going to be single for a while.

Like: Can't break your heart if no one can get to it.
Like: More free time (And money... )
Dislike: Feel alone often.
Dislike: Feel like something is missing.

Well, I can deal with only feeling 85% if it stops the feeling of crashing from 110% to 0%.

 

[Try2Live4God]

What do you enjoy about it?

What do you NOT enjoy about it?

I am really getting tired of being single yet so scared of being vulnerable to another person..

I know I am not alone and many people like I struggle daily too..

Any words of wisdom?

I enjoy the free time, saving the money, and being able to do as I feel.
What I don't enjoy about it is that the feeling of loneliness can surface at times. Sometimes you might also want to see a romance movie, but there's no one to see it with.
I usually try to keep my time occupied. I have a bunch of different hobbies so I delve into them. I also try to hang with the guys as often as possible. I struggle with it all the time, but I try not to take it into my own hands. I've been in trouble before for doing that...so i'm chillin'!

 

[_Paladin_]

I am really getting tired of being single yet so scared of being vulnerable to another person..

I know I am not alone and many people like I struggle daily too..

Any words of wisdom?

Find someone you know you can trust who won't judge you. If you find someone like that do not be quick to beleive they have intentionally wronged you even if you think they have because miscommunications many times create the most problems that don't need to happen.

 

[~HopeFloats~]

Yea, I've let myself be vulnerable to someone before. Didn't work out so great...

I like my walls and I like being single, but there's something missing too. I want someone to love, protect and cherish, but I know that in order to be worthy of that I would have to be vulnerable to them. That's something I just can't do, so I guess I'm going to be single for a while.

My thoughts and feelings exactly..

Find someone you know you can trust who won't judge you

The problem is I do not fully trust anyone.. I know that is my issue and my issue alone..

 

[_Paladin_]

The problem is I do not fully trust anyone.. I know that is my issue and my issue alone..

No one needs to fully trust anyone to begin with. Trust is something that is earned and definitely not something one goes into flippantly and you have every right to be cautious, but it doesn't mean you will be alone forever. There are men and women out there who can be trusted, and many I suspect may be thinking the very same things you are. Some times they may be hard to find, but God will bring you someone in his timing, you know you can trust God.

 

[silentpoet]

I guess when you are single you can be a slob and nobody cares. But that is part of the problem, nobody cares.

About the only good thing I can say about being single is that it has to end one way or the other.

 

[~HopeFloats~]

Some times they may be hard to find, but God will bring you someone in his timing, you know you can trust God.

You know here I was all looking for something, words, advice scripture and I am getting more in return then I ever hoped for..

Thanks..

 

[NewCovenant]

I have thoroughly enjoyed my singlehood for the last 3 years. A lot, I mean. It's been really refreshing. I have learned more about myself, become self-sufficient, and explored my creativity in the last few years than in the forty years leading up to it. I did not choose to become a single person; my ex made that choise for me. But now I rejoice in it. I'm happier in myself and in the Lord than I have ever been.

(The only hair in my soup is that my daughter has moved home with her 2 babies. Much as I love them, I resent the intrusion. I was loving my empty-nestedness!)

 

[~HopeFloats~]

Yes, I do think we are single for a reason I have learned that only I can depend on me if I need something done.. I have no one to blame but myslef for failures..

I too have become someone I was not when I was married, with anything good or bad you have to see the blessings..

 

[Beauty4Ashes]

I like free time to get stuff done (still feels like I don't have nearly enough time though!)
I like the chance to grow in my personal relationship with God and be able to give my whole heart to God, not being distracted by a man.
I like the time to be able to grow in leadership at various ministries, lead a prayer group, and lead a biblestudy(with a guy..no one to have a problem witht that)
I like the time to mould my character as I learn new things on my own
I like the forced independance, learning to take care of myself, fix stuff around the house, trap mice, kill spiders, unclog drains, fix furniture, and other odd jobs with my handy screw driver and hammer(things I would MUCH rather have a guy do but realizing God doesn't want me to be soley dependant upon anyone other than Him to do anything for me is an eye-opener)
I like Hanging out with my pet rabbit and fish by myself.
I like making my own decisions and choosing how I spend my time.
I like being able to drop everything to help or hang out with a friend.
I like being able to choose what I purchase with the money God lets me earn.

I don't like feeling lonely (duh)....especially at night
Not having someone to share my heart with on a daily basis
Not having someone to pray with on a daily basis
Not being able to give all the love I have stored up inside me(theres just too much to just give to family friends and God)
Having to work all the time to make a living with no one to help support me
Not having time to cook, sew, clean (things I love) because I'm always working (hence the former point)
I don't like feeling this need or desire to be loved, protected, and provided for by a human being but not having it fufilled
I don't like knowing I desire so strongly to be a wife and mother yet am not and don't have the slightest clue when I will be.
I don't like the lack of emotional intimacy, spiritual intimacy, physical intimacy, and mental intimacy.
I don't like not having someone to do ministry with hand-in-hand
I don't like not having a best friend who I can share everything with
Also, I don't like knowing theres no one waiting for me at home at the end of the day.

OVERALL, GOD KNOWS WHAT HE IS DOING. SO I'M LEARNING PATIENCE, ONE DAY AT A TIME. MAY WE ALL TRUST HIM MORE EVERY STEP OF THE WAY, THAT HE HAS OUR BEST INTERESTS AT HEART AND HIS TIMING IS PERFECT.

 

[mina]

I like: spending my money how I want to when I want to,

I dislike: the free time(this I used to enjoy, but lately it just makes me lonely)
being lonely ( I enjoy being alone sometimes, but all the time is not fun)
not having someone to talk to that actually cares what you have to say
having the desire to share my life, be someone's wife, but having no direction towards that
lack of intimacy on all levels (physical, mental, emotional, etc...)
not having support and care of another person in my life
I long to have a family, and that is unfulfuilled in my life
I want to share in ministry with my husband
I want to pray with and for someone everyday
I think Beauty4ashes summed it up pretty well

 

[JPPT1974]

I love my independence
I love my freedom
I love to do things alone
I love to do whatever I please
I love to spend whatever I please

 

[fishstix]

Likes:
-knowing that this is the lifestyle God wants for me right now
-having plenty of space and time for myself
-making decisions without having to consult another person
-not having someone else drag me along to places I don't want to go to
-being able to hang out with single friends of both genders without any appearance of evil
-not having to schedule around another person

Dislikes
-can't really think of any at the moment

 

[itsgood]

I am like the opposite, I am too trusting, and desperate and clingy, hence why they all can't stand me. I don't like anything about being singe I know I am supposed to be a good Anglican and just shut up about it but it sucks

 

[22smsbears]

I love being single for so many reasons...
Being able to focus on my goals i have set for myself
Not answering to anyone
Being free to do anything i wish at a moments notice
Having alone time
Being able to work on my relationship with god instead of some boy
keeping my level head
not having to ditch my friends or family time
being free to date anyone i want anytime i want
and all the other millions of reasons i just can't think of right now

And the only times i dislike being single are for those fleeting moments when i see someone with their boyfriend holding hands and i think..i miss that...until reality hits again and i realize...all the crap she has to put up with to get those "few nice moments"...then i am good again..

 

[itsgood]

how old are you 22smsbears?

 

[lunalinda]

What do you enjoy about it?

Eh, not having to "worry" about being hurt or mistreated I guess? Other than that, there's really nothing at all too enjoyable about singlehood for me. Free time or more money or doing whatever I want or all that "me, me, me" stuff just isn't that intriguing to me as it is to everyone else. It's not something I cling to or am afraid to let go of. I like having to care about someone or "answering" to someone or considering someone else over myself. And it's nice to be wanted and needed and to have an importance.*shrug*

What do you NOT enjoy about it?

Well the obvious. Being lonely more often than not, physically, mentally, emotionally...or any way else. Having all these urges to be affectionate and no one to be affectionate with. Having the desire for affection shown to ME, knowing no one will deliver it. No "special person" to lean on when I'm in need, to seek out when I'm afraid, to hug when I seek comfort, not even a dang shoulder to cry on or his voice telling me that everything will be okay and that's he's there for me. No one to call my own, and me not being HIS own. Oyyy.

I am really getting tired of being single yet so scared of being vulnerable to another person..

Hmmm I'm a bit like that as well. I'm scared of that vulnerability thing, because I for one know how I can be when I put my trust on someone and let my love for them determine what I should think or feel, even against my better judgment. I'm one of those "fools in love." Groan. So yes, that alone is something that I do NOT want to treat lightly, but ugh, that tiredness of being single is REALLY annoying just the same!

Any words of wisdom?

Hmmm don't let the loneliness overpower better judgment I guess? It definitely would be better to be single and alone than to be MARRIED and alone, because at least in your singlehood, you wouldn't have to worry about the torture of having a mate be visible but not even THERE for you.