Being single is hard...

[GracefulGalPal]

I've been single for years... its not fun. I wish I could find a suitable boyfriend or husband. I want to continue my mothers bloodline and give her grandkids! Going to church with a partner sounds so nice...

Maybe I should start looking myself instead of of waiting for someone to come to me?

 

[Applekrate]

I've been single for years... its not fun. I wish I could find a suitable boyfriend or husband. I want to continue my mothers bloodline and give her grandkids! Going to church with a partner sounds so nice...

Maybe I should start looking myself instead of of waiting for someone to come to me?

I wish you well with that. I think we are all looking here for the right gal or guy to marry. There are more and more singles than ever it seems but, also seem harder than ever to meet. I think standards and prosperity are the primary things that keep us single. Everyone has something 'wrong' with them- none of us are perfect yet, we all seem to want perfection. I wish I had an answer.
I have yet to marry and have come close twice but, each time, they were unfaithful. It is very discouraging. The mormons have such a good 'network' for singles to meet and that is another reason why they are multiplying like rabbits. I only wish there were better organized ways for Christian singles. Over time, out faith numbers can only continue to decline if we do not reproduce and have larger families as people did prior to around the 1960s.

On the other side of things- I do not see many older married couples that I would want to be in their shoes. So, there are not many Christian family role models to inspire me. Single life is easy and comfortable for many.

 

[Antig]

I think single is fine for some but not for others. Myself, it fine.

 

[Applekrate]

I can see too why women are better off than guys being with someone as they are always on the receiving end be it- phone calls, letters, texts, flowers, being fed at dinner or lunch, taken to shows, concerts, ring, clothes etc. All the expense is on the guy and he has to make the move, etc. A guy get tools for gifts to fix things ( work). Society has changed things over the years where you are looked down if you buy a gal a washer, ironing board, or other devide related to any kind of work. Gifts for gals have to be things with no practical or useful value- flowers, jewelry, perfume, etc
Am not complaining, just commenting on the way things have become.
If you buy tires for your wife as a gift you go to jail. If a wife buys tires for her husband, she is praised.
Perhaps these are more reasons why guys are less ready to commit or put it off.

 

[timewerx]

On the other side of things- I do not see many older married couples that I would want to be in their shoes. So, there are not many Christian family role models to inspire me. Single life is easy and comfortable for many.

That's an interesting perspective.

Well, I don't know. Wish the truth came easy like who is really my family, if having family of your own matters at all.

 

[Saucy]

I'd definitely say jump in and start looking. I find being single difficult as well, but I give myself hope by knowing I can meet my future spouse at any time. I can meet her at church, at the store, online, at the movies, with a group of friends, or even on the road! You just never know when God intended you to meet 'the one'.

 

[PeachieKeen]

I've been single for years... its not fun. I wish I could find a suitable boyfriend or husband. I want to continue my mothers bloodline and give her grandkids! Going to church with a partner sounds so nice...

Maybe I should start looking myself instead of of waiting for someone to come to me?

Totally support you starting to look. I used to think some guy was supposed to find me and it was unromantic if I looked. Then one of my older friends said (as I was whining about being single) "well when it becomes important to you it'll happen." I argued it was extremely important than me. She said "in your life, when you wanted a job or fitness or a cute outfit or anything- did you just wait for it to come to you or did you get up and pursue it?" It really is true. Its awkward and hard putting yourself out there, dating, being vulnerable- but if you want a relationship then you must try.

 

[leothelioness]

I can see too why women are better off than guys being with someone as they are always on the receiving end be it- phone calls, letters, texts, flowers, being fed at dinner or lunch, taken to shows, concerts, ring, clothes etc. All the expense is on the guy and he has to make the move, etc. A guy get tools for gifts to fix things ( work). Society has changed things over the years where you are looked down if you buy a gal a washer, ironing board, or other devide related to any kind of work. Gifts for gals have to be things with no practical or useful value- flowers, jewelry, perfume, etc
Am not complaining, just commenting on the way things have become.
If you buy tires for your wife as a gift you go to jail. If a wife buys tires for her husband, she is praised.
Perhaps these are more reasons why guys are less ready to commit or put it off.

This is becoming less true as time goes on. I think the scales are shifting gradually to where women are starting to do more and more with regards to pursuing, organizing and paying for dates, treating the man, etc.

Not to mention the fact that some women like having the option to do nice things for a guy or paying their own way. I certainly would like to pay for myself.

 

[Paulie079]

I can see too why women are better off than guys being with someone as they are always on the receiving end be it- phone calls, letters, texts, flowers, being fed at dinner or lunch, taken to shows, concerts, ring, clothes etc. All the expense is on the guy and he has to make the move, etc. A guy get tools for gifts to fix things ( work). Society has changed things over the years where you are looked down if you buy a gal a washer, ironing board, or other devide related to any kind of work. Gifts for gals have to be things with no practical or useful value- flowers, jewelry, perfume, etc
Am not complaining, just commenting on the way things have become.
If you buy tires for your wife as a gift you go to jail. If a wife buys tires for her husband, she is praised.
Perhaps these are more reasons why guys are less ready to commit or put it off.

I guess the question becomes if you are going to concern yourself with how society does things vs. how you might operate according to a more biblically/theologically accurate foundation. Marriage and relationships are a partnership that require sacrifice from both people. If husbands are to love their wives as Christ loved the church, you might say that men initiate with women in the same way that Christ initiated with his church.

And I think it's way overgeneralizing to say those are the gifts that men generally receive nowadays. It's such an overgeneralization that I don't even think that it's an accurate statement. And I have never heard of anyone going to jail for buying tires for their wife. That's a pretty absurd example.

 

[NurseAbigail]

I've been single for years... its not fun. I wish I could find a suitable boyfriend or husband. I want to continue my mothers bloodline and give her grandkids! Going to church with a partner sounds so nice...

Maybe I should start looking myself instead of of waiting for someone to come to me?

Build yourself up first, life as a single only comes once, grow deeper in your relationship with God, do the things you love, reach your career dreams, travel, these things of course you can still accomplish when married but it will be very different if you had experienced it as a single. Be the best you, God destined you to be and trust Him that He will guide you to the right man. Better to remain single than to marry the wrong person. And....heartbreak hurts, feels like you've been stabbed in the chest and hit in the head with a baseball bat (kinda exagerated there a bit, but seriously though it hurts like hell), I pray you never experience it but instead will be found by the right guy on your first relationship. God bless you on your journey!

 

[Applekrate]

I guess the question becomes if you are going to concern yourself with how society does things vs. how you might operate according to a more biblically/theologically accurate foundation. Marriage and relationships are a partnership that require sacrifice from both people. If husbands are to love their wives as Christ loved the church, you might say that men initiate with women in the same way that Christ initiated with his church.

And I think it's way overgeneralizing to say those are the gifts that men generally receive nowadays. It's such an overgeneralization that I don't even think that it's an accurate statement. And I have never heard of anyone going to jail for buying tires for their wife. That's a pretty absurd example.

often, I point is over emphasized to show its validity. I was, obviously, not speaking literally going to jail but, he is looked down upon if he buys his wife a gift that has anything to do with work or being practical. and that is wrong IMO.

 

[leothelioness]

often, I point is over emphasized to show its validity. I was, obviously, not speaking literally going to jail but, he is looked down upon if he buys his wife a gift that has anything to do with work or being practical. and that is wrong IMO.

Says who? I love gifts that I can use. I'd be ecstatic to get a gift that I could use at work. Lol

 

[High Fidelity]

often, I point is over emphasized to show its validity. I was, obviously, not speaking literally going to jail but, he is looked down upon if he buys his wife a gift that has anything to do with work or being practical. and that is wrong IMO.

I don't think that can be quantified accurately.

Some women love practical things. Some love flowers. Some prefer chocolates or a bottle of wine... we're all different in our own ways and if you're dating or married to someone, you should have a general idea of what would make them happy to receive. As to what others make of that gift, to heck with what they think; you're aiming to please your partner, not nosy onlookers.

 

[pinbackbsc04]

Sorry to jump in late on the conversation, but if I were you, I would do what some others have said and focus on being single at this stage in your life. I saw that you're only 20, and there's plenty of time to be worried about serious relationships down the line. Personally, I've dated one guy in the past 3 years, and it made me miserable. It was apparent that he wasn't the right guy, because I constantly felt like I had to share my time with he and the Lord, and more times than not, the BF won. That should NEVER be the case. Your partner should only serve to encourage you in your walk with Christ, never hinder it.

At nearly 32, I could be terrified that I may never have a husband, children, etc., because I refuse to marry someone else who's been married/had children/both. Let's be honest, at my age, that's the exception, not the rule. If the Lord is preparing someone for me, it'll happen in due time. I'm not suggesting you sit idly by, but I definitely wouldn't recommend dating apps, etc. Put yourself where the Lord wants you. Join groups at church, seek out Bible studies with other God-fearing believers, and you never know if a wonderful relationship might blossom from you and a young man's mutual love for the Lord--not shared musical interests, crossfitting, movie quoting, or other fleeting shared interest, but rather something substantial.

Good luck in whichever you choose, but leave it up to the Lord and take it to Him in prayer if it's truly something that's burdening your heart. God bless!

 

[( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)]

I've been single for years... its not fun. I wish I could find a suitable boyfriend or husband. I want to continue my mothers bloodline and give her grandkids! Going to church with a partner sounds so nice...

Maybe I should start looking myself instead of of waiting for someone to come to me?

I understand. And I hope I'm not taking your quote out of context and making it sound like something you didn't mean. But it would be a darn shame for you to go thru your season of singleness and not experience near the amount of fun you would being married. If it's really not fun then why don't you make it fun? Eat that tub of ice cream, walk around your apartment naked, or do whatever else in within your Christian liberties to do. Don't let your circumstances dictate how you are going to live your life.

Zig Zigler: "You may not be able to change the direction of the wind, but you can adjust your sails to get to the destination you're looking for."

 

[Willing-heart]

Sorry to jump in late on the conversation, but if I were you, I would do what some others have said and focus on being single at this stage in your life. I saw that you're only 20, and there's plenty of time to be worried about serious relationships down the line. Personally, I've dated one guy in the past 3 years, and it made me miserable. It was apparent that he wasn't the right guy, because I constantly felt like I had to share my time with he and the Lord, and more times than not, the BF won. That should NEVER be the case. Your partner should only serve to encourage you in your walk with Christ, never hinder it.

At nearly 32, I could be terrified that I may never have a husband, children, etc., because I refuse to marry someone else who's been married/had children/both. Let's be honest, at my age, that's the exception, not the rule. If the Lord is preparing someone for me, it'll happen in due time. I'm not suggesting you sit idly by, but I definitely wouldn't recommend dating apps, etc. Put yourself where the Lord wants you. Join groups at church, seek out Bible studies with other God-fearing believers, and you never know if a wonderful relationship might blossom from you and a young man's mutual love for the Lord--not shared musical interests, crossfitting, movie quoting, or other fleeting shared interest, but rather something substantial.

Good luck in whichever you choose, but leave it up to the Lord and take it to Him in prayer if it's truly something that's burdening your heart. God bless!

Very well said. I like the fact that you choose not to settle for less and you shouldn’t. It’s definitely better to be single than to be married to the wrong person.

My advice to OP is to draw near to God. Seek first the Kingdom of God, above all else. I think it’s important that you use your time of loneliness as alone time with God. Please don’t waste your time of loneliness. Draw near!

 

[Myworld19]

I can see too why women are better off than guys being with someone as they are always on the receiving end be it- phone calls, letters, texts, flowers, being fed at dinner or lunch, taken to shows, concerts, ring, clothes etc. All the expense is on the guy and he has to make the move, etc. A guy get tools for gifts to fix things ( work). Society has changed things over the years where you are looked down if you buy a gal a washer, ironing board, or other devide related to any kind of work. Gifts for gals have to be things with no practical or useful value- flowers, jewelry, perfume, etc
Am not complaining, just commenting on the way things have become.
If you buy tires for your wife as a gift you go to jail. If a wife buys tires for her husband, she is praised.
Perhaps these are more reasons why guys are less ready to commit or put it off.

I am slightly miffed at your beliefs of women. I am quite uncomfortable having it all paid for by a man. Its an equal team partnership well it should be! I personally don't give a hoot about a mans wallet or gifts. Kindness love laughter and honesty is all good for me and many others no doubt