Being in Relationship with a Non-Christian

[Jay217]

Coming Home from a Youth Conference me and a few others on the bus started having a religious conversation on different aspects of denominations and some ethics.

Well there was one remark that really surprised/confused me.

A friend brought up the idea that being in a relationship with a Non-Christian is a sin and shouldn't be done. the other 2 we were talking to quickly agreed to that statement.

To me this doesn't make complete sense and came to these forums in search of answers from a variety of people.

I also have a story directly about this issue that i will tell if others are interested.

 

[drich0150]

We are told: Not to seek out relationships with those of different faiths. We would be unequally yoked.

 

[Girlee]

I don't know about a "sin", particulary.
But what is the real reason for dating--to find a mate for life.
So would you really want a non-christian as a mate for life?
If no, then what would be the point of dating a non-christian?

Maybe for someone young who is "just dating". However, people can fall in love at any age. So, whatever age a person is, they may find the one they want to spend their life with. If that person happens to be a non-christian, for the committed christian this can definately cause problems down the road.

 

[KM Richards]

We are told: Not to seek out relationships with those of different faiths. We would be unequally yoked.

Exactly. It will cause problems, and don't plan on trying to convert them either because if they aren't already Christians...they aren't right for you.

Sometimes even when two Christians get together, it won't work...much less a believer and a non believer.

It's best to wait, and let God join you with someone HE brings your way.

If you'll let Him hook you up...you'll be hooked up right and you'll be so glad you did, as opposed to being miserable and getting divorced, etc, etc

 

[obamazmama]

God's Word, the Bible, says "To not be yoked with unbelievers."

I think its best to have a relationship with a fellow, mature Christian.

 

[Dionysiou]

you could be the one who saves them! dont give up on them just because they dont believe! your in a position to influence!

 

[followerofthename]

Even the best relationships are difficult, and pain in the midst of great joy. If your relationship with God is the center of who you are (and it better, for we cannot serve two masters--God's throne in our hearts was made exclusively for Him), how can we possibly have a relationship with one who does not share this? And if the relationship is going to progress to marriage, what of children? What do you tell them--"God is mommy's God, but not daddy's"?

I've been married over 8 years to a wonderful woman. She is a fellow believer. But it's been very difficult at times. I can't imagine how much more difficult it would be if she didn't believe.

 

[Jay217]

Exactly. It will cause problems, and don't plan on trying to convert them either because if they aren't already Christians...they aren't right for you.

Sometimes even when two Christians get together, it won't work...much less a believer and a non believer.

It's best to wait, and let God join you with someone HE brings your way.

If you'll let Him hook you up...you'll be hooked up right and you'll be so glad you did, as opposed to being miserable and getting divorced, etc, etc

This is the biggest point that gets me. If a non-believer is willing to give a religious person a chance than how can they say they are not right?

A story from a family friend. She is a heavy catholic and went to Mass every Saturday Night. Starting going out with a man whose parent's were atheist and was curious why she couldn't do anything Saturday night until after 8. She said it was mass, he simply accepted it and then they did get married. After they married he joined the church and got baptized and the sacraments.

The thing is to keep your mind and heart open, If you won't accept somebody's other view point how can think others will accept yours? And if your willing to learn then there is nothing to fear but much to gain.

If they followed these thoughts than there would be less people who would find God. There is a difference between standing on the street preaching and talking to Agnostics who are into conversing.

As Christians we should be there willing to help anyone who is willing to learn and believe. But in return we must also learn and accept not all will be able accept teachings.

 

[theb4ssm4ncometh]

you could be the one who saves them! dont give up on them just because they dont believe! your in a position to influence!

THis is known as missionarry dating. it doesnt work.

2 Corinthians 6:14 Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?

eventualy, people in a relationship that have fundamentally different moral beleifs will rip each other apart. keep it at friends says I.

 

[theb4ssm4ncometh]

btw please move this post to relationship forum er something not business

 

[Hisluv4me]

We are told to not be yoked with unbelievers. A relationship with someone who is not a Christian will only be problematic in the long run. It's not to say that it never works out. I'm sure they can, but it is not what God has intended for us. We are to be paired up with other believers in the faith.

 

[Moraiah]

This is the biggest point that gets me. If a non-believer is willing to give a religious person a chance than how can they say they are not right?

A story from a family friend. She is a heavy catholic and went to Mass every Saturday Night. Starting going out with a man whose parent's were atheist and was curious why she couldn't do anything Saturday night until after 8. She said it was mass, he simply accepted it and then they did get married. After they married he joined the church and got baptized and the sacraments.

The thing is to keep your mind and heart open, If you won't accept somebody's other view point how can think others will accept yours? And if your willing to learn then there is nothing to fear but much to gain.

If they followed these thoughts than there would be less people who would find God. There is a difference between standing on the street preaching and talking to Agnostics who are into conversing.

As Christians we should be there willing to help anyone who is willing to learn and believe. But in return we must also learn and accept not all will be able accept teachings.

I am in complete agreement with this. If that family friend turned her back on the man just because he was not a Christian at the time than what would that have done, she wouldn't have him as a husband and it's likely he would never have converted.

I'm not saying that we should go out and date every non-christian in the world for the purpose of converting them I think sometimes you just need to relax, breathe, and let God take you where he's going to take you. Why completely close yourself off to things that could turn out good, that could be willed by God, that would be closing yourself off to God.

 

[GenericTaoMaster]

Coming Home from a Youth Conference me and a few others on the bus started having a religious conversation on different aspects of denominations and some ethics.

Well there was one remark that really surprised/confused me.

A friend brought up the idea that being in a relationship with a Non-Christian is a sin and shouldn't be done. the other 2 we were talking to quickly agreed to that statement.

To me this doesn't make complete sense and came to these forums in search of answers from a variety of people.

I also have a story directly about this issue that i will tell if others are interested.

my father was a Christian, my mother was a Muslim, I don't need to get into specifics but they got along fine. My little sister turned out great. Let's not get into how I turned out though.

 

[Servant of Jesus]

Could this not also apply to business relationships?

I have always found that my business relationships with fellow Christians were far better than ones with non-believers. On a job site, the difference is immediately noticeable: no swearing.

But it goes far beyond that in terms of adopting ethical business practices. In the secular world, ethics or morality or doing the right thing doesn't matter- as long as there is no law that is being broken, whatever you do is fine.

Actually, today, it goes even one step further- as long as you don't get caught, it's fine.

 

[GenericTaoMaster]

Dear Servant of Jesus,

I tend to agree with you-- that in the secular world, "as long as no law is being broken, whatever you do is fine." This view tends to pervade the business world, as profits have been valued over ethics.

However, equating "non-Christian" with "non-ethical" is very stereotypical. Although you could do very well by following a rule of only doing business with Christians, I would view that as a categorical error. It would be kind of like treating the symptoms of the disease rather than treating the disease itself.

I'm not a Christian but I tend to believe I act with the utmost ethics in my business dealings. How I survived the commercial real estate world? I just imposed my will on others and acted ethically. If I got screwed over, so be it. I can only control what I can control- and I act how I act regardless of external factors. I will treat you fairly even if you do not treat me fairly.

I became a much better reader of people.

I never gave anyone credit for being of a certain faith or not being of a certain faith.

Everyone starts from square 1 and trust is earned, not handed out like a pastry.

Business relationships are built just like friendships. Friendships are reciprocal. My experience in real estate has taught me that being shady can win in the short-run. But generally it is not worth the bad reputation and will lose you out in the long-run.

Another specific point I'd like to make... it's also possible to achieve self-fulfilling prophecies. For example, if you expect the worst out of someone, that's usually what you will get. So if you encounter a business transaction with a non-Christian, try expecting the best out of them and act accordingly.

 

[Atheist(change my mind)]

Apparently, I can't Post here...

 

[Kaitlin08]

I thought I would say it's strange to see this in the business forum, but Christians shouldn't enter relationships with the goal of missionary dating. It's ok to date non-Christians without that intention, and marry them too, even though details of religious belief and religious compatibility (for example, whether or not the two will attend church together) should be discussed early on.

 

[Jay217]

I thought I would say it's strange to see this in the business forum, but Christians shouldn't enter relationships with the goal of missionary dating. It's ok to date non-Christians without that intention, and marry them too, even though details of religious belief and religious compatibility (for example, whether or not the two will attend church together) should be discussed early on.

lol this was a thread i made several monthes back and it was ethics/morality. and i didn't realize we had a relationship section.

CF is so large!

 

[tsr]

I firmly believe it is NOT a sin......this is a good opportunity to witness to this person by example. Not being pushey or stern by any means. Praying to the Holy Spirit will help you and guide you on to handle the situation.

 

[Tempura]

I lived with an atheist woman for some time. We got along great. She knew about my beliefs, and I knew of hers, we could always be honest if one wanted to ask something from another. We got separated, but not because of our different beliefs. We learned to respect eachother, truly respect, not just tolerate eachother. There was love, and in some way - still is. Before that, the same happened with another girl but the relationship was shorter.

I should add that although neither one confessed to be religious, they were very Christian at heart, and in their actions. Two very loving, warm, helpful and understanding human beings, and I will always respect them both. To me, a person is a person - not Christian, Atheist, Muslim etc. Of course there are some exceptions, since some relationships (right now I recall couple of friends) tend to focus on one thing and sometimes "the thing" is religion.

Moraiah, Jay, Taomaster and tsr have good points.