Beauty and being a christian that do not fit the beauty standard

[helloitsme]

Hello. I am 18F. When I was younger, I was very studious. But, I was also really ugly even if I still think I am. It was bad when I was in high school. I was fat, I had crooked teeth, I still have a huge forehead and thin eyebrow. But all that didnt matter to me because I just kept on foucing on Jesus and school. I got called ugly by own friend and I got asked out as a joke while eveyone laughed at me and told me I was super unattractive. This kept going until last year of high school . I didnt fit in with the popular girl and they teased me asking me if I ever had a bf or if I had sexually active. Obviously not. One day, I decided that I wanted to fit in the beauty standard.I spent 2 hours at the gym everyday and I ate very very small portion. I got so sick of eating food with calories. I was anorexic. But, a random man at the gym told me I was attractive and I got super confused because I am not.When I went to college, a friend kept on telling me I was pretty which confused me even more.So, I started to give more care about my looks. I started to wear makeup. trying to look less ugly. I spent hours trying to look less like the kid that got bullied in high school . Stuff like school and how smart I was didnt matter to me anymore.I wanted to fit in with the world.I installed dating apps just for some validation. I hang out with the popolar kids and they just talked about boys and sex/My grades started to get really bad. I got lazy and depressed.Today, I realize that I do not care about being pretty and fitting in the beauty standard all that matter is Jesus and my education because I am wasting my intelligence and all my talents. I also do not know why I cant be pretty and be smart and religious, in my head I cant not try to be pretty and smart. Maybe some of you will ask why cant you try to be both, idk I cant be both.Theres nothing I can do to change how huge my forehead is, how crooked my nose is unless I have surgery. Even when random men tell me Im pretty. I cant believe it. I do not care about that anymore so its ok .I just want some prayers because I decided to apply to a program. I want to change my life and stop being superficial. I want to be in Christ more than anything because he never judge my looks. He was always with me, but I decided to ignore him due to my own selfishness. Im just asking yall if any of you struggle with what I struggled and what books I can read in the bible , what can I do to be more in christ.

 

[friend of]

Hello and welcome

 

[returntosender]

Hello. I am 18F. When I was younger, I was very studious. But, I was also really ugly even if I still think I am. It was bad when I was in high school. I was fat, I had crooked teeth, I still have a huge forehead and thin eyebrow. But all that didnt matter to me because I just kept on foucing on Jesus and school. I got called ugly by own friend and I got asked out as a joke while eveyone laughed at me and told me I was super unattractive. This kept going until last year of high school . I didnt fit in with the popular girl and they teased me asking me if I ever had a bf or if I had sexually active. Obviously not. One day, I decided that I wanted to fit in the beauty standard.I spent 2 hours at the gym everyday and I ate very very small portion. I got so sick of eating food with calories. I was anorexic. But, a random man at the gym told me I was attractive and I got super confused because I am not.When I went to college, a friend kept on telling me I was pretty which confused me even more.So, I started to give more care about my looks. I started to wear makeup. trying to look less ugly. I spent hours trying to look less like the kid that got bullied in high school . Stuff like school and how smart I was didnt matter to me anymore.I wanted to fit in with the world.I installed dating apps just for some validation. I hang out with the popolar kids and they just talked about boys and sex/My grades started to get really bad. I got lazy and depressed.Today, I realize that I do not care about being pretty and fitting in the beauty standard all that matter is Jesus and my education because I am wasting my intelligence and all my talents. I also do not know why I cant be pretty and be smart and religious, in my head I cant not try to be pretty and smart. Maybe some of you will ask why cant you try to be both, idk I cant be both.Theres nothing I can do to change how huge my forehead is, how crooked my nose is unless I have surgery. Even when random men tell me Im pretty. I cant believe it. I do not care about that anymore so its ok .I just want some prayers because I decided to apply to a program. I want to change my life and stop being superficial. I want to be in Christ more than anything because he never judge my looks. He was always with me, but I decided to ignore him due to my own selfishness. Im just asking yall if any of you struggle with what I struggled and what books I can read in the bible , what can I do to be more in christ.

We know you're very very intelligent if you have a huge forehead. That's a nice attribute. In years to come you'll realize you weren't ugly..i never knew i was pretty until i got old and turned ugly.

 

[returntosender]

Sorry, my funny bone must be active tonight. I was serious though.

 

[Maria Billingsley]

Hello. I am 18F. When I was younger, I was very studious. But, I was also really ugly even if I still think I am. It was bad when I was in high school. I was fat, I had crooked teeth, I still have a huge forehead and thin eyebrow. But all that didnt matter to me because I just kept on foucing on Jesus and school. I got called ugly by own friend and I got asked out as a joke while eveyone laughed at me and told me I was super unattractive. This kept going until last year of high school . I didnt fit in with the popular girl and they teased me asking me if I ever had a bf or if I had sexually active. Obviously not. One day, I decided that I wanted to fit in the beauty standard.I spent 2 hours at the gym everyday and I ate very very small portion. I got so sick of eating food with calories. I was anorexic. But, a random man at the gym told me I was attractive and I got super confused because I am not.When I went to college, a friend kept on telling me I was pretty which confused me even more.So, I started to give more care about my looks. I started to wear makeup. trying to look less ugly. I spent hours trying to look less like the kid that got bullied in high school . Stuff like school and how smart I was didnt matter to me anymore.I wanted to fit in with the world.I installed dating apps just for some validation. I hang out with the popolar kids and they just talked about boys and sex/My grades started to get really bad. I got lazy and depressed.Today, I realize that I do not care about being pretty and fitting in the beauty standard all that matter is Jesus and my education because I am wasting my intelligence and all my talents. I also do not know why I cant be pretty and be smart and religious, in my head I cant not try to be pretty and smart. Maybe some of you will ask why cant you try to be both, idk I cant be both.Theres nothing I can do to change how huge my forehead is, how crooked my nose is unless I have surgery. Even when random men tell me Im pretty. I cant believe it. I do not care about that anymore so its ok .I just want some prayers because I decided to apply to a program. I want to change my life and stop being superficial. I want to be in Christ more than anything because he never judge my looks. He was always with me, but I decided to ignore him due to my own selfishness. Im just asking yall if any of you struggle with what I struggled and what books I can read in the bible , what can I do to be more in christ.

Welcome!
Blessings.

 

[Michie]

Welcome to CF!

 

[DragonFox91]

Oh goodness Hello. It seems like you are carrying a lot. I''m very sorry & very sad you've had to deal with what you have had to. It's not easy. I understand. I can offer some words.

First off: of what other girls have told you: you know it's wrong. I know you know it's wrong because you are a Christian & what you are saying. I can tell how upset it makes you. Therefore, since we know it's wrong, it's lies & therefore not something that should make you down. It's just the opinions of some very young women. You have to try to move on from what they said. It's over, it's done, it's in the past, you can only grow from it & clearly are growing. I promise they will grow from their experiences too.

2: Men are telling you you're attactive but 'I'm not'??? Why would you believe that & what those girls told you but not what these men are telling you? They are completely different people with completely different experiences form the women who told you lies in the past. It's actually disrespectful to their characters to assume they're lying too.

3: I'm sure you've heard this, but a lot of people have insecurities about their bodies. Sometimes they even look absolutely perfect & they still don't think it's enough. You need to remember truth. The fact is, & you won't hear this spoken of much, but men have their own insecurities about their bodies too. You don't have to be absolutely perfect for the right one b/c whoever it is, he will've been in the same shoes at some point.

4: I don't believe you are being superficial. It is healthy to care about how you look; you just want the right amount of it.

5: Bible books to reccomend: Are you new to Bible reading? If so start with one of the Gospels - really pick one, they all have their perks. They are Matthew, Mark, Luke, & John. They are about Jesus's ministry & why he came. Next Romans and/or Phillipians. Probably both b/c Phillippians are short. Romans gets deeper into Christ's purpose & Phillipians has a lot of spiritual living type stuff you're looking for (as does Romans.)
I reccomend then usually to read Genesis 1 thru about Abraham's promise, then Exodus thru about the 10 Commandments, (you need the Old Testament to give you better overall picture, then you could probably read some of Psalms, Proverbs, etc. before reading the rest of the NT in its entirety.

6: We are happy you signed up for CF. Hope to see your posts!

EDIT:
7: Being smart & religious is so very beautiful
Dead serious

 

[SeventhFisherofMen]

Hello. I am 18F. When I was younger, I was very studious. But, I was also really ugly even if I still think I am. It was bad when I was in high school. I was fat, I had crooked teeth, I still have a huge forehead and thin eyebrow. But all that didnt matter to me because I just kept on foucing on Jesus and school. I got called ugly by own friend and I got asked out as a joke while eveyone laughed at me and told me I was super unattractive. This kept going until last year of high school . I didnt fit in with the popular girl and they teased me asking me if I ever had a bf or if I had sexually active. Obviously not. One day, I decided that I wanted to fit in the beauty standard.I spent 2 hours at the gym everyday and I ate very very small portion. I got so sick of eating food with calories. I was anorexic. But, a random man at the gym told me I was attractive and I got super confused because I am not.When I went to college, a friend kept on telling me I was pretty which confused me even more.So, I started to give more care about my looks. I started to wear makeup. trying to look less ugly. I spent hours trying to look less like the kid that got bullied in high school . Stuff like school and how smart I was didnt matter to me anymore.I wanted to fit in with the world.I installed dating apps just for some validation. I hang out with the popolar kids and they just talked about boys and sex/My grades started to get really bad. I got lazy and depressed.Today, I realize that I do not care about being pretty and fitting in the beauty standard all that matter is Jesus and my education because I am wasting my intelligence and all my talents. I also do not know why I cant be pretty and be smart and religious, in my head I cant not try to be pretty and smart. Maybe some of you will ask why cant you try to be both, idk I cant be both.Theres nothing I can do to change how huge my forehead is, how crooked my nose is unless I have surgery. Even when random men tell me Im pretty. I cant believe it. I do not care about that anymore so its ok .I just want some prayers because I decided to apply to a program. I want to change my life and stop being superficial. I want to be in Christ more than anything because he never judge my looks. He was always with me, but I decided to ignore him due to my own selfishness. Im just asking yall if any of you struggle with what I struggled and what books I can read in the bible , what can I do to be more in christ.

I can relate as a guy i was always pretty nerdy. I still think im ugly the only thing i do is give myself a buzz cut. i think i might be average now cause some people think i'm handsome while some don't give me any attention. Oh well I can't change how i am just gotta live with myself.


You're right about 1 thing; Jesus is always faithful, He has always loved you. Hey if you want to be naturally beautiful by all means do so. There can be balance in life, you can be beautiful and smart. Just make sure that whoever is with you loves you no matter what. Jesus made you how you are now. i'm not gonna give you dating advice, but if you can learn from my mistakes maybe you'll learn to accept how you are, the pros and cons.

I honestly think natural beauty and confidence are good, but substance like if you are intelligent and have a good personality (sounds super overused "good personality") but for real a good personality is better than a hollow shell of a person who is pretty. People who are super attractive are actually a turnoff cause you can tell they look at themselves all the time in the mirror and feel entitled to everyone's attention.

As a good friend once said to me often:
"You do you man"

 

[Christoph Maria]

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Welcome to Christian Forums!
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LORD, those who know you will trust in You.
You have never deserted those who look to You.
Psalms 9:10
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Be strong and brave.
Do not be terrified.
Do not lose hope.
I am the LORD your God.
I will be with you everywhere you go."
Joshua 1:9
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People of Jerusalem, listen to me!
Have faith in the LORD your God.
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Have faith in his prophets.
Then you will have success."
2 Chronicles 20:20
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Some trust in horses.
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Psalms 20:7
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