Aye, 'tis cutting

[Corbobs]

My name is, well, confidential, and I have a problem.

I've been cutting myself, and I want to stop, for I don't want to defile the temple of God that is my body, but I haven't the want, nor desire to even try. I'm able to hold back once in a while on account of my friends and their concern, but I always seem to fall back into it. I do it because I've found that physical pain is so much easier to deal with than emotional pain, and when I'm in pain, my mind can't focus on anything else. I feel as if I'm dragging my friends into it with me, and I can't stand the thought of possibly making them cut themselves as well. But, thank you to all of my friends who have once again proven to me how much you truly do love me and care for me. Please, pray for me, and for all of my friends that we may get over the bumps in our lives and get back to the way God made our lives to be: FUN!!!

-Dr. Xi

 

[Cerulean_Butterfly]

You aren't alone. We all know what you're experiencing. And please know that talking about it helps. Come here and vent.. share what you're going through. We'll try to help as best we can. You're loved.

-Jo.

 

[Hidden face_Hurting heart]

I'm so sorry that you're dealing with this right now Corbobs. I saw your thread in the depression forum as well. You're in my prayers. I know how you feel about not wanting any of your friends to cut...that's really hard. We're all pulling for you!

 

[Corbobs]

Thank you all very much. I shall come here to vent, for if I vent with my friends, well, it puts their mind on it and makes them think about it, which is the first step to actually doing it. But being able to vent with people who will do no more than just support me is very helpful. They already have enough problems to deal with, and don't need to deal with having to try and hide any scars.

 

[always_hope]

I am praying for you right now.

 

[SparkyMel]

They already have enough problems to deal with, and don't need to deal with having to try and hide any scars.

Yeah, I felt that too... I didn't want to load the burden onto my friends who supported me so much so I had to keep quiet. I don't talk about it any more in the hope that they wont be worried about me.

Also, they did begin to get bored with it, and since I was quite open with it when they all knew, they thought I was doing it for attention because they hadn't had to deal with anything like that in their lives before.

I've found that physical pain is so much easier to deal with than emotional pain

I know... it's hard to find a way of expressing that anger... how about trying exercise? I started doing a lot of exercise and it made me feel a whole lot better. Also, try and cut down on the chocolate. It's good for an hour or so but the sugar low doesnt do anything for anyone. And alcohol is bad too.

Good luck xxx

 

[leigh01]

ya in my prayers doll i hope ya get the strength to stop

 

[Corbobs]

I eat hardly anything. A medication I take for A.D.H.D. has an appetite suppressant, so I don't eat a whole lot until it wears off. I don't eat a whole lot of candy anyways, though. Alcohol makes me sick just smelling it, I can't drink something that smells quite so bad. But the temptation to drink is definitely there, 'cause my parents have a decent amout of it in a cubbard that's easily accessable to me. But, I haven't had any yet. I'm very out of shape, so working out is just frustrating 'cause I can't do what I know I should be able to. Plus that might just give me more time to dwell on how much life sucks right now. But thank you soooooo much for your suggestions, and, of course, your prayers.

The friend that I was really concerned about had a revelation, if that's what you want to call it, and no longer wants to cut herself!!