Are You High, Low or Level? (5)

[Soulwings]

for everyone...

Low, still, and really tired and worried about Jarrod.

 

[Brinmar]

Praying for you April.

Today lowish - still don't have a pdoc, went to my gp yesterday. He said he would find me a pdoc. (he's such a nice guy)

Thinking that if I was even lower - I might be able to sleep.

Heidi

 

[ryo88]

i'm low
just feel like crying, but not sure what i want to cry about

 

[Jeshu]

i'm low
just feel like crying, but not sure what i want to cry about

Just cry because it hurts so much feeling so sad, for the feelings you can't really trust, it is your illness that distorts the feelings, take comfort in that.

In The End I cried for God, self and other and found this relieved the sadness the best and I learned to see that I served God also when I'm so miserable, and so - sowing in tears Il reaped a harvest of Joy, how glad my heart has become mourning God and us hurting down here.

For I know Jesus will come soon and wipe all our tears from our faces, how glad we will be then? Unbelievable Joy awaits those who mourn for those hurting, even ourselves.

I hope you got some comfort out from this

 

[bomichaels]

I was extremely depressed today. I broke down and cried twice. I fell on my knees to the Lord and begged for help. I can't find my way out of this pit of darkness. It has been such a living nightmare for me. Can't even
think straight. Sometimes I feel I've ruined my life. I want out of this dark pit so bad. I'm sick of living in such despair. Anyone ever feel so helpless?

 

[Jeshu]

I was extremely depressed today. I broke down and cried twice. I fell on my knees to the Lord and begged for help. I can't find my way out of this pit of darkness. It has been such a living nightmare for me. Can't even
think straight. Sometimes I feel I've ruined my life. I want out of this dark pit so bad. I'm sick of living in such despair. Anyone ever feel so helpless?

Yes dear friend, for years, it was Hell.

However you can find relief - honestly true - let the bad go and hold on to what is right - can you see you look at how bad it is and you hear what they say and then you feel really bad, yet ponder on this - look at Jesus and hear what He says and you will feel peace and find safety from the storm - keep doing that - look at God's good and let no good go down that bottomless pit.

Please understand what I try to show you - look at Jesus - keep doing that - He got me away from where you must now be. He loves you true and has the ability to overcome what got you floored. He will give you ability and insight to fight the enemy you must face almost every day. He is awesome!

 

[sundogkm]

I've been feeling a little depressed the past couple of days, but not nearly as bad as it has been before. I don't know if everything I've been doing (supplements, alkaline water, sleeping regularly, exercising, etc.) is helping, or if I just haven't hit a bad spot yet.

 

[michael714]

I'd gotten sick last week and felt a sinus infection coming on Saturday. Had some prescription nasal spray left over and tried it. It worked, but my mood dropped and I got irritable at the same time. After looking online, saw that there are steriods in the nasal spray (it's Nasonex), a no-no for me. My thoughts went on the dark side and I'm still recovering.
Am low off and on today.

Sundog, what kinds of supplements are you taking? What is alkaline water supposed to do?

 

[sundogkm]

I've been taking fish oil and St. John's Wort. I read those are supposed to be good for mood regulation. Alkaline water supposedly changes the pH of your body to make it less acidic, which is supposed to make you healthier in all kinds of ways. My sister got me started on it, I don't really completely understand how it works. It might be a big scam, but I'm getting it for free, so I'm going to try it anyway. Couldn't hurt. I can't figure out if it's working or not, though.

 

[Soulwings]

Low.

Very low. Can't talk with my husband about it either, so I basically have no one to talk with unless I want a guaranteed trip into the hospital. I HATE THIS.

 

[Jeshu]

Low.

Very low. Can't talk with my husband about it either, so I basically have no one to talk with unless I want a guaranteed trip into the hospital. I HATE THIS.

Maybe hospital would be best? One can deal with only so much and your plate has been full lately.

Praying you find ability to cope

 

[michael714]

Woke up at 3:30am this morning with anxiety. Racing thoughts, too much into my head. It doesn't help that I work alone in an office (I rent an office in an office building so am not completely alone.)

April, do you have at least one other woman you could talk with or get support from there? Might there be some from the women's ministry at your church who could come along side with you? I tend not to tell my wife too much of what I'm going through because it was a traumatic experience for her when I went into the hospital last year. I offset it by meeting with other men once a week for support, and usually call a guy 3x a week. I don't tell them everything that's going through my head, but enough to get the point through.

 

[Soulwings]

I really don't know, at this point, if hospital is the best idea. My husband is almost out of his head with the physical pain he's in, so he is not in the best place to offer support. But at the same time, I really don't want to go into hos... it would put me behind in my classes. However, it is looking more and more attractive, if nothing else as an escape. I don't know. It would relieve some stress but put more stress on catching up with uni. I honestly don't know...

Michael, to answer your question... I don't really have anyone IRL that I can talk with. I have a friend that I met on Facebook that says I can call her and count her as a support, but I haven't been brave enough to do so yet although we have exchanged phone numbers. I see my therapist once a week, so that's something... and I'm reaching out to my pastor and my advisor on campus (both men though), so I am getting some extra help. I just don't think that it's enough. Thanks for caring.

 

[Jeshu]

I really don't know, at this point, if hospital is the best idea. My husband is almost out of his head with the physical pain he's in, so he is not in the best place to offer support. But at the same time, I really don't want to go into hos... it would put me behind in my classes. However, it is looking more and more attractive, if nothing else as an escape. I don't know. It would relieve some stress but put more stress on catching up with uni. I honestly don't know...

I hope you don't mind me saying what I think April.

I think you are at breaking point and could crash even lower. Every stop has to be pulled out to stabilise your mood a little. I know Jarrod has problems, but don't let this cloud your judgement about your own situation.

What about uni? If you keep going as is, will you make it till the end of the semester? If not, would it not be better to give in now, rather than later. Look April you have been going seriously suicidal, it is not safe to trust yourself you need all the help you can get, to survive your low.

Please understand that your low will pass, they all do in the end, but at what price? Plus we need to help the healing by lessening stress and by being kind to ourselves and letting ourselves be taken care off by our loved ones for some time.

You are in a often loveless reality, this is what you must try and change, get love your way, it is now that you are without, it is now that you need it form others, please don't deny yourself good care!

You are seriously ill April, please accept that my dear.

Wishing you some solid contemplations

 

[michael714]

Woke up at 1:30am 3 nights ago, 3:30 Weds night, and 4:30 yesterday. Guess it's slowly getting better. The full moon seems to mess me up at times. Was struggling with anxiety, feeling wired. Had a counseling appt. today, was dealing with some fear issues. Am somewhat midlevel... and tired.

 

[michael714]

Still not sleeping well, messed up thoughts, some anxiety. I think the steriod based nasal spray I took 2 weeks ago is still messing up. Did a little reading online yesterday and steriods + bipolar is a no-no. It has induced psychosis in some.

 

[Jeshu]

Feeling aggressive today and wanting to be like that.

 

[michael714]

Not my best day. Haven't slept well for several weeks. Had horrible thoughts this morning; after time reading God's word and praying, my mind calmed down. I feel wired now and wrung out; ready for a nap.
My mind is rather anxious.

 

[Brinmar]

Hey everybody, I'm back online. Sounds like I missed a lot that's going on.

April - Sorry to hear that you're in the position that you're thinking about the hosp! I hope it helps to come here to the forum and talk about things?? I will keep you in my prayers - always.

I just missed going to the hosp myself - yikes! Had to do some fast talking.

Michael - does it help to work with someone else in the office?? I'm by myself at work and I like it that way. I really hated to move into new place.

Gerry - Good to "hear" you again! Is that you with grandchildren??

Am back and high, high, high
God Bless everybody today
Heidi

 

[Jeshu]

Not my best day. Haven't slept well for several weeks. Had horrible thoughts this morning; after time reading God's word and praying, my mind calmed down. I feel wired now and wrung out; ready for a nap.
My mind is rather anxious.

Sorry to hear about your suffering, glad you also find that God's Word is best in Spirit - indeed He speaks in Peace.

What is my comfort in life and death? That I belong to Jesus body and soul!

Michael I was encouraged to hear your depression has lessened since you reduced the mood stabiliser, but yes more anxiety and other 'wild' times do come around more often then. Keeping the stress down and giving your hard times to Jesus, asking for ability back in return, works the best I found.

Be most blessed.

Hey everybody, I'm back online. Sounds like I missed a lot that's going on.

April - Sorry to hear that you're in the position that you're thinking about the hosp! I hope it helps to come here to the forum and talk about things?? I will keep you in my prayers - always.

I just missed going to the hosp myself - yikes! Had to do some fast talking.

Michael - does it help to work with someone else in the office?? I'm by myself at work and I like it that way. I really hated to move into new place.

Gerry - Good to "hear" you again! Is that you with grandchildren??

Am back and high, high, high
God Bless everybody today
Heidi

Heidi you are back and you are up high, even after all the sadness you been through? I hope you will find your comfort in the Lord as He cares more about our loved ones than we can ever do.

And yes that is the grand kids with me, they were having a ball riding horse back on grand dads lap. As you can see we were loving it.


Hi everyone else - my mood - still feeling aggressive but a little less than yesterday.