Are Tubas of the Devil?

[freespirit2001]

GREAT QUESTION CADAN!!!
LOLXOXLOL!!!

Happy New Year!!!

TUBAS HORNS CAN BE USED WITH THE EVIL HORNS
OF EVIL CREATION POWERS.....

( SEE THE CURSE OF THE TUBA...BELOW

 

[freespirit2001]

Great Question, Cadan!!!



HAVEN'T YOU HEARD OF THE CURSE OF THE TUBA, CADAN???

TUBAS WERE INVOLVED WITH THE CULTURE WARS
OF THE POWERS OF CREATION
AT THE FOUNDATION OF THE EARTH,

SO THEY HAVE TO BE EVIL

THEY ARE TO BLAME FOR THE MESS WE ARE IN NOW.

WEAPONS' SCIENTISTS LOVE TUBAS,
SO DO POLITICIANS.
VAMPIRES LOVE TUBAS....
IT GOES ON AND ON AND ON.........

HERE ARE SOME "TUBA CURSE" QUOTES:

"I HAVE LIFTED THE VEIL. I HAVE CREATED LIFE,
WRESTLED THE SECRET OF LIFE FROM LIFE.
NOW DO YOU UNDERSTAND?
FROM THE LIVES OF THOSE WHO HAVE GONE BEFORE,
I HAVE CREATED LIFE!"

DR. VON NIEMANN ( LIONELL ATWILL ) ABOUT HIS TUBA
AS THE VAMPIRE BAT, NEAR THE END, AFTER HIS SECRET HAS BEEN DISCOVERED
( HOUSE OF DRACULA 1933)

"MAD? IS THE ONE WHO HAS SOLVED THE SECRET OF LIFE TO BE CONSIDERED MAD?"

DR. VON NIEMANN ABOUT HIS TUBA

"HE NEVER WORKS AND NEVER BATHES, AND YET HE APPEARS WELL FED ALWAYS....
WELL, WHAT DOES HE LIVE ON?"

THE VAMPIRE BAT, DISCUSSING HANS, THE TUBA PLAYER, AS THE SUSPECTING VAMPIRE

"THAT'S WHY I'VE COME TO YOU, [ AS A TUBA PLAYER ]
TO SEEK RELEASE FROM A CURSE OF MISERY AND HORROR,
WHICH I AM POWERLESS TO FIGHT ALONE."

COUNT DRACULA ( JOHN CARRADINE )
HOUSE OF DRACULA, ASKING DR. EDELMAN TO CURE HIM OF HIS TUBA VAMPIRISM
1945

 

[Snowy]

I think I have entered the Tuba Twilight Zone

 

[DaveS]

Unfortunately I cannot find any approval of tubas in the Bible so tubas must therefore be evil.
This is proven by the effect it has on your ears if you stand too near to one when it is sounding.

Violins on the other hand are symbols of virtue and anyone who plays one is only one step from Jesus Himself! However, I still pray that Jesus will guide my fingers from the wrong notes and place them on the right path of eternal good playing. It is answered occasionally.

 

[DaveS]

As usual in threads discussing morality, the question of what precisely is meant by the term needs to be addressed. Is the modern instrument called a "tuba" what was meant by the condemnation of "serpents" in Scripture? What exactly is the instrument referred to in Psalms 150, "Praise him upon the trumpet"? Does the condemnation extent to euphoniums? Sousaphones? Sousaphones played in Susa, by the Medes and the Persians? This raises many questions that call for answers. Does God's forgiveness extend even to an unrepentant tuba-player? What about someone who wants to play a tuba but resists the temptation? This is rife with moral issues!

No you see this is one of the most misinterpreted scriptures in the Bible. When it is procalimed to praise him upon the trumpet it was never actually meant to mean to play the trumpet, it meant simply that to praise God in the right manner you must sit on a trumpet! This was symbolic of 'stting on' or in larger examples, squashing evil.

While Tubas are clearly evil I think we should also show compassion as a Tuba can't help being a Tuba - it was made that way. However, you must remember that for a tuba to persist in it's activities that it must therefore ultimately be doomed to the Hell where it will be subjected to a 100 piece string orchestra for eternity! Muhaha.. I mean.. what a pity.

 

[praying]

See,

This is why i stay away from threads about musical instruments, I don't like all the Sax and Violins!

Kiwimac

LOL..

 

[Diane_Windsor]

Are Tubas of the Devil?

To fat kids they are

DIANE

 

[freespirit2001]

...The GOOD, the BAD....
and the TUBA.

 

[ottaia]

Unfortunately I cannot find any approval of tubas in the Bible so tubas must therefore be evil.
This is proven by the effect it has on your ears if you stand too near to one when it is sounding.

Violins on the other hand are symbols of virtue and anyone who plays one is only one step from Jesus Himself! However, I still pray that Jesus will guide my fingers from the wrong notes and place them on the right path of eternal good playing. It is answered occasionally.

But of course we KNOW Jesus meant to call Tubas abominations. He just didn't get around to it. So, yes, tubas are evil and all people who play them will be relegated to the lowest levels of Hell!

 

[DaveS]

But of course we KNOW Jesus meant to call Tubas abominations. He just didn't get around to it. So, yes, tubas are evil and all people who play them will be relegated to the lowest levels of Hell!

I disagree, he said quite clearly that tubas are evil - it is you that decides to ignore those parts! Afterall.... you are a liberal!!!
Unfortunately I errr.. forgot err... where those err.. Bible verses err.. were. Ok maybe he didn't in your version of the Bible. Afterall, my translators must have been infinitely better at translating than your translators. My version says very clearly in Leviticus 18, 'Thou shalt not play with tubakind as with violinkind; it is abomination'. My version is the King Charles Version of 1679 by the way. It should be available in all obscure book stores.

 

[ottaia]

But if I play with my own tuba will I go blind?

 

[praying]

But if I play with my own tuba will I go blind?

You win the funny prize for this thread.

 

[Joykins]

Back in my college daze, I dated a nice Catholic boy, an engineering student who also played tuba in an oompah band.

He had wonderful mouth control.

Tubas are clearly of God.

 

[mark53]

But if I play with my own tuba will I go blind?

Nah
But you WILL go deaf!

 

[DaveS]

But if I play with my own tuba will I go blind?

Nay, you shall only be blind to your sin! Repent! REPENT! REPENT!!!

Saying that, Satan has a bit of a reputation for being very good at poking out eyes with a red hot poker so yeah... maybe you will go blind.

Dave

PS - I think that was quite a good fire and brimstone impersonation myself...

 

[angela 2]

It depends how one employs one's tuba.

 

[Teshi]

It depends how one employs one's tuba.

You are an evil, evil moral relativist. Get thee behind me, etc.

 

[EmmaJane]

According to an old Flanders and Swann song, the tuba can be used to induce suicidal thoughts

(My neighbour's asleep in his bed
I'll soon make him wish he was dead
I'll take up the tuba instead)

 

[ps139]

This guy was my childhood hero for a stint of about 6 months sometime in 1984:

So, there is no possible way that tubas can be the devil, or else Tubby would have been a badguy, and he wasn't!

 

[FLANDIDLYANDERS]

According to an old Flanders and Swann song, the tuba can be used to induce suicidal thoughts

(My neighbour's asleep in his bed
I'll soon make him wish he was dead
I'll take up the tuba instead)

I deny ever writing such a song...