Am I...lost?

[TheEndIsHere]

Recently I decided to read the book, Crazy Love, by Francis Chan. Ever since reading it I've had extremely strong convictions on my life and strong doubts in my salvation, faith, and God.

Basically, I feel like I have grown extremely cold towards God. I was raised in the church and it feels like I take Jesus, the cross, and sin for granted because I have been exposed to it all so much. The way this ties into the book making me think so much is that it talks about really loving God and not being a lukewarm christian. I also keep getting Mathew 7:21 in my head.

I'm honestly terrified and questioning everything I thought was true. I feel like all of my church attendance, bible reading, and such have just been acts of obedience. I don't know that they come out of a genuine love. It seems interesting to me to even love God. I find that it is an extremely hard concept, because I've always felt distant from God. To me, he has always been up in heaven and I've been down here on Earth. I've always tried to do what he says, and thought I was right in doing so, but now I feel like all I am is a self-righteous, heart-of-stone christian.

What makes it even worse is the fact that I've done very little to share the gospel, and have had very little interest in doing so. I want to want to, but I just never have. I brought maybe one friend to church in my life, and have always been somewhat scared to admit I was a "christian."

I feel like I have absolutely no passion for the ways of Christ. I try to remind myself that it's faith that saves people, but then I worry about my motives too. If I want to be saved because I don't want to go to Hell, want to lead a meaningful life, and want to know that I have a purpose am I really right in my heart? I keep thinking of a John Piper quote that says:

"The critical question for our generation—and for every generation—
is this: If you could have heaven, with no sickness, and with all the
friends you ever had on earth, and all the food you ever liked, and
all the leisure activities you ever enjoyed, and all the natural beauties
you ever saw, all the physical pleasures you ever tasted, and no
human conflict or any natural disasters, could you be satisfied with
heaven, if Christ were not there?"

That actually sounds VERY much like me. I'm extremely scared, because I don't WANT to be this way. I want to be happy with just Jesus, but I'm not. I want to have a genuine love for him, but I don't. I want to see and know Jesus, but I can't get myself to that place. I can't change my heart to truly desire God. Does this mean I'm just going to die and go to Hell? Is there NOTHING I can do to change the way I am? I've even heard people say that I can't, but I can go to Jesus and he will change me, but I'm not even sure of how that works. I'm extremely scared, and in need of some serious help.

and for more background: I am 19 and thought I was truly saved until very recently. I have a lot of church background and know all about Christ loving us and dying for our sins. I know that it is a "free" gift and everything, but I've recently become aware of the "heart knowledge vs. head knowledge" issue. I have always intended to follow God and do his will, but I never thought about the importance of my motives, or actually knowing him. I even heard the lingo of having "a personal relationship" with Jesus, but always thought that just meant reading the word and praying, which I do try to always do. Now I see people like Francis Chan and John Piper talking about loving Jesus in this sense and I think I might be missing something huge.

 

[LWB]

Greetings TheEndIsHere, and welcome to this place.

That John Piper quote doesn't make sense from the perspective that I understand. It's like asking someone if they could walk a hundred miles without any legs.

I believe my life: my capacity to experience sensation, my ability to remember and have a sense of self, and everything that allows me to be an active and creative agent in this world, especially my ability to love; it is all given to me by Christ. It is like I borrow it for a time, and God looks and sees what I do with it. My life force IS Christ (John 1:4).

Therefore it would be impossible to experience paradise without Christ. Christ is the branch we stand upon, and if that branch is cut away, there is nothing left to do but endlessly fall.

Is there nothing about the universe and this experience of life you now have that excites you, TheEndIsHere? All of it comes from God, through Christ. The beautiful curves of woman, the graceful shape of trees and branches and leaves, the fierceness of lions, the expanse of stars floating above (these are the most beautiful things I can think of).

If you love any one thing about existence, by default you must love the one who invented it. When you realise that Christ is more than a figure in a dusty old book; that he is as vital to you as the blood that pumps through your arteries and veins, it is impossible to do anything but fall down in ecstasy and wonder.

It doesn't matter that you don't feel adoration at this present moment. The massive orb of the sun can be entirely eclipsed by the tiny little moon when orbits attain a certain alignment. You are in a spiritual eclipse, and I know it feels eerie and frightening. But it is like a game. We're playing hide and seek with God, and it is meant to be fun and exciting!

Don't worry. Trust God.

 

[heymikey80]

You've found something huge. Pursue it.

I've got dozens of books, from Roman Catholic through Piper to laymen, all saying what you've discovered.

If you have an intellectual bent like I do, you might need to convince yourself it's "there", in Scripture. I spent years, really, trying to figure out where people got this "personal relationship" thing. I think I've found it in that word "faith". It's not "religion" or "duty" or even "a list of concepts I think are true".

It's reliance.

Charles Blondin was a high-wire performer and traversed Niagara Gorge a number of times. At one point he drove a wheelbarrow filled with bricks across the wire for the Prince of Wales. When he reached the cliff, the prince remarked on how skilled he was.
Blondin then asked, "Do you believe I can take a person across?"

"Why certainly."

"Then get in."

The prince didn't take Blondin up on his offer.

The prince showed an intellectual opinion as to Blondin's abilities, but not faith. He didn't rely on Blondin to get him across.

You really can't be relying on Christ, and not feel the impact. A lot changes. Including where you end up, eternally. It's sometimes terrifying. It's sometimes exhilarating. It's a lot like being on a high wire. And trusting the Expert.

So far, you may not have seen it as important. Nobody's really prepared you for this. So understandably, you may need some time to adjust. But the question will come back: "Do you really believe Jesus can bring people back from the dead?"

If you do -- get in.

If you want to see someone who should be most excited over your discovery, talk with your pastor. He can get the "How to" down for you from your church's viewpoint. It does mean getting involved in some things, growing in them, learning to connect with God in talking with Him, reading what He's interested in, knowing why, and getting involved, yourself.

I'm familiar with the barriers to evangelizing, too, firsthand. You may actually find you're good at it, if you tried it. it's not about bargaining people into the Kingdom. It's about recognizing God wants you to represent Him -- out loud.

 

[tturt]

TheEndIsHere, oh, I know exactly how you feel because I was there. No, you're not lost but you're just at a point where you want a lot more than you presently have in your relationship with Christ Jesus. I too spent lots of time studying His word, attending church, etc. but there just seemed to be something missing. I searched a very long time in His Word, articles, books, etc. and pursued different avenues but the results were the same as before.

Then this is what I found - that my singing, praying, praising, and thanksgiving greatly centered on me. I’m not knocking any of those things but I lacked worshiping Yahweh. I don’t have all the answers but I’m just sharing with you what I’ve learned. It’s going to be criticized but it’s worth it because I think it will help you. Worshiping isn’t singing, it isn’t praising, it's not praying. Though I think those things can lead us into worship. Of course, worship impacts us but worshiping Yahweh is all about Him. I’ve become more convinced that ever that’s one of the most important things believers can learn to do. It’s not expecting anything in return but just worshiping Him.

Ever tried to get a group to define worship? Usually people say it’s how we live our lives, etc. and that is important. Worship is about our hearts. “God is a Spirit: and they that worship him must worship him in spirit and in truth.” (John 4:24). So how do we do worship Him in spirit and truth?

I encourage you to get before Him alone and spend time often in private worship in your prayer closet. Psa 24 states that clean hands and pure hearts are needed to worship. He'll show us areas where we need to forgive, to examine ourselves, etc. If we have areas in our hearts, where we don’t let anyone including Yahweh, then it puts distance between us. We need to let Him heal those wounds. Primarily, you might want to spend time meditating (doesn’t mean emptying your mind, it means focusing) on Yahweh and His Word such as Psa 145 about who He is, sometimes play music that’s just about Him (you heard How Great Thou Art by Sandi Patty on you tube?) because it affects our hearts, or get a list of His titles, names and attributes. Locate a list that has Scripture listed so they can be checked out.

Then think about 2-3 of those at a time. (Some days I try not to say me, my, or I). All the while listening for His voice - usually still, quiet voice.

There will be distractions - briefly write down the things that need to be done and there will be a point where those thoughts will stop. Petition Yahweh to fully understand Eph 3:17"That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love, 18May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height; 19And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God."

 

[Sketcher]

I love God. I don't love him nearly enough.

I've become a Christian - as far as what Christianity requires for entry, I've done that, and I trust that God has adopted me and saved me. He's the only hope I have for getting into Heaven. Yet I sin, I selfishly have my own priorities above God's priorities for me. I have a long way to go before I love God "enough." But that's the direction I need to move in.

 

[SoldierOfSoul]

In "Mere Christianity" the author C.S. Lewis answers the question of "how do we know that we love God enough?" C.S. Lewis answers this by saying that it is much safer to trust in the love that God has for us and revealed to us then to look to the love that we have for Him. Yes we are to love Him with our whole heart, soul, mind and strength but sometimes in our human make up this is impossible: our feelings are the problem. Our emotions can be affected by things as simple as eating a good or bad meal.

Our feelings and emotions that we feel and experience are not reliable guides into our spiritual security, we are to do as heymikey80 said, and that is to trust in Jesus Christ and in His inerrant word as our foundation for belief in God. His word is a book of promises to humanity and we are to take hold of these promises with thankfulness and reverence but we are to take hold of them in true faith and undoubting belief.

If we do not have faith in His word then we will not have faith in Jesus Christ and we do not show our Maker and Saviour honor or respect by doing so. C.S. Lewis went on to say that if we want to love God and do not yet have these feelings we should do the things that those who do love God would do and good feelings will follow (if God so desires to give us these feelings). Act in faith by doing such things as going to church, really reading the word and believing it, studying theology and what you believe as the foundation of your faith, study the atonement.

Doing these things in truth will produce growth, you do not need to go and get re-saved but you do need to make Jesus the number one priority in your life and to learn to trust Him with your life. I am working at doing the same thing right now brother and faith seems so hard sometimes, but God is faithful and He loves us and He has called us out of this evil world, we can trust Him, He is the only One in the universe deserving of trust.

 

[Phaedron777]

Relationship > Religion by far

Sainthood isn't a walk in the park. Sometimes it's about holding on to your faith and ideals despite all opposition.

You might try immersing yourself in the original Hebrew. The Saviors actual name is Yahshua. We don't ask foreigners to change their name upon entering our country, how much more respect, therefore, deserves the king of kings.

Moreover, there is merit to the science of the spoken word. There's a passage in proverbs that states "life and death are in ones words." Yahshua also said "It's not what goes into a man that defile him, but what comes out."

We are a peculiar people. We turn our back on wordly things, walking not according to the flesh, but to the spirit. We are able to feel joy and profound peace, patience, gentleness and love, even when all around us is chaos.

In life, everything either grows or dies. If you're relationship with our God and Savior isn't growing, then it's dying. If it's not moving forward, then it's backsliding. I was saved as a kid, and didn't even know the difference between the old man and new man, nor did I perceive myself in need of any real forgiveness. But in my backsliding and rebellion I almost completely fell away, then I saw what I was missing. Due to some tragedy I couldn't forgive myself and certain other people. Now I guard my faith as the most precious thing I could possibly have. I am utterly confounded that God would even bother with me at this point, yet I feel his presence more strongly then ever, especially now as I honor and obey his commandments, not just a vague conception of the commandment to love.

"He that is forgiven of much, loves much." It's the same dynamic as the prodigal son when he finally returned.

As for your questioning things, you might discuss your doubts and thoughts with someone like me. I've studied all religions, all philosophies, all sciences, life, human nature, psychology, occultism, conspiracies, various new age concepts, and I'll tell you flat out, nothing even compares to the love that was shed for us on the cross. The truth will set you free, and if the son of man sets you free, you are free indeed.

You are a light shining in the darkness. You can't let the light go out, no matter how bad it gets, no matter how depressed you might become. I feel deep compassion for such people, but it doesn't change that we must walk in the way of love. Our worldy sorrow is nothing more then failure in God's eyes. His forgiveness is found in patience, mercy, and longsuffering, and the tests and trials of life will go to great measures to form the character of his son within us.

 

[Goodbook]

TheEndIsHere
'The fear of the Lord is the beginning of Wisdom'
Don't worry you are in the right place.

Your brothers and sisters are right when they say you can ask Jesus to change you. We cannot do this by ourselves. God wants us to love him, but we have to let him in our lives. We cannot be good on our own and expect to spend eternity in heaven with him by ignoring him while we are on earth! Yes Jesus is in heaven, but he promised to be with us after he ascended. How? He promised all those who believe in him that they would be baptised in the Holy Spirit. He called the Holy Spirit the 'helper' or 'comforter'. He's the reason we know God is real, because he was with God from the beginning, helping create the world. He was with Jesus, it was by his power that he was able to do his miracles. I have a scripture for you, to answer your question 'how does this work'

Ezekiel 36:26 God promises:
A new heart I also I will give you, and a new spirit will I put within you: and I will take away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give you an heart of flesh.
And I will put my spirit within you, and cause you to walk in my statutes, and ye shall keep my judgements and do them.

So you don't have to try and change yourself, just admit your sins and you just have to trust and believe in Jesus will save you - from your sins, and from hell.
When we pray to God, we get to know him, and when we believe that Jesus died for us, paid for our sins with his blood and rose again, he sends us his Holy Spirit to dwell within us, to walk with us, to guide us, to teach us, to show us the truths in the Bible, to sanctify us and make us Holy. He even gives us gifts that we can exercise to bring others who are lost to Him. So it's not anything we do, we just trust in Him to help us. And by believing in Jesus he helps us become free from sin...so we don't have to keep battling and wondering and being fearful. He does this by showing us what is true and what are lies and deceptions. In our walk we will be tested surely but if we keep to his Word we will be fine!

Keep praying and reading your bible and ask God for wisdom - he will show you!

 

[_Believer_]

Be weary of what you read outside of the Bible. It can really alter your belief system to what they want you to think is true. That being said, I have never read the book you are referring to, but then again, I usually only read my Bible as far as religious literature goes.

 

[klatyla]

The Word is Living and Breathing, God is Spirit, to understand the things of God we need to come to him in Spirit, the Holy Spirit. There is a knowledge yes a head knowledge but there is a knowledge which is Gods knowledge, wisdom, revelation.

When Jesus asked his disciples Who do you say I am? Simon answered you are the Christ The Son of the living God then Jesus replied Blessed are you Simon son of Jonah for this was not revealed to you by man but by my Father in heaven And I tell you that you are Peter and on this rock I will build my church and the gates of Hades will not overcome it. Jesus builds his church on revelation the wisdom of God not man. This comes in a relationship with Jesus, as with someone you have first met, spend time with them, talk, cry, walk with them, read the word, and the more we do the more he is revealed to us and the more we trust and rely on him and love him. Amen
God knows your heart you just need to speak it to him and you will find him thats a promise from God.

 

[TheEndIsHere]

Thank you all so much for your replies. They have helped me significantly, and I feel like things are getting better. I have a few down days still, but I am trying my hardest to just have faith and trust. It's still honestly a bit of a skeptical, blind faith, but I'm hoping it will grow into more with time and prayer. I am trying to pray A LOT and asking God to give me more faith, change my heart, and send his spirit down for me every day. I'm struggling, but hopefully He will use that struggle to strengthen me.

 

[klatyla]

1 Corinth 2:11 For who among you knows the thoughts of a man except the spirit of the man which is in him? Even so the thoughts of God no one knows except the Spirit of God. Now we have received the spirit , not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit which is from God so that we may know the things freely given to us by God, which things we also speak, not in words taught by human wisdom, but in those taught by the Spirit combining spiritual thoughts with spiritual words.

The Spirit searches all things, yea the deep things of God.

God searches our hearts, motives and all, everything we do or think is uncovered our lives become transparent, so Praise God that when he reveals these things to us, we know he is doing a good thing, changing our hearts, renewing areas in our lives that HE knows needs attention Amen. Continue as you are brother you are definitely on the right track, its not how we go off track its how we get back Amen. God continue to abundantly bless you, guide and lead you.

 

[heymikey80]

Good to hear back from you, TEIH. God often shows us the vacuum in our lives so we know what it's like when it's filled. We're going to be surprised by God pretty often.

I'll tell you, it put a massive pressure on me when I ran smack into this situation, too. We all slam into it at some point. You're at that point. Growth has to come from the opportunity to grow. So welcome, and keep asking, seeking, knocking. We're here to help, too.

 

[Matthew Lee]

I have been where you are. I grew up as a P.K. and was saved at the age of six. Without getting into a lot of theology, I really didn't have anything to be saved from. By the time I headed off to Bible college I was well versed in the Bible and then off to college and studies in theology. I had a wonderful head knowledge of Christianity and why I was a Baptist, but like you, it was more head knowledge than heart. It was as I started living life that the Lord started becoming "real." My prayer life became more like a conversation with God than an audience and God began answering my prayers both big and small. It was as I started facing the trials of life that God was able to start making his presence felt in my life. I trusted God to find a wife for me and I am married to my perfect partner in every sense of the word. It was when I became a father that I really understood the relationship the Lord wants to have with us.

Let me give you one more thing that I have discovered: Love is an attitude, not an emotion. Relax, at 19 you are just starting this thing called life. The fact that this worries you is a good sign, stay in his Word, develop your prayer life and trust God to lead you through life experiences that will bring you closer to him.

Hope this helps a bit.

 

[childofGod31]

Recently I decided to read the book, Crazy Love, by Francis Chan. Ever since reading it I've had extremely strong convictions on my life and strong doubts in my salvation, faith, and God.

Basically, I feel like I have grown extremely cold towards God. I was raised in the church and it feels like I take Jesus, the cross, and sin for granted because I have been exposed to it all so much. The way this ties into the book making me think so much is that it talks about really loving God and not being a lukewarm christian. I also keep getting Mathew 7:21 in my head.

I'm honestly terrified and questioning everything I thought was true. I feel like all of my church attendance, bible reading, and such have just been acts of obedience. I don't know that they come out of a genuine love. It seems interesting to me to even love God. I find that it is an extremely hard concept, because I've always felt distant from God. To me, he has always been up in heaven and I've been down here on Earth. I've always tried to do what he says, and thought I was right in doing so, but now I feel like all I am is a self-righteous, heart-of-stone christian.

What makes it even worse is the fact that I've done very little to share the gospel, and have had very little interest in doing so. I want to want to, but I just never have. I brought maybe one friend to church in my life, and have always been somewhat scared to admit I was a "christian."

I feel like I have absolutely no passion for the ways of Christ. I try to remind myself that it's faith that saves people, but then I worry about my motives too. If I want to be saved because I don't want to go to Hell, want to lead a meaningful life, and want to know that I have a purpose am I really right in my heart? I keep thinking of a John Piper quote that says:

"The critical question for our generation—and for every generation—
is this: If you could have heaven, with no sickness, and with all the
friends you ever had on earth, and all the food you ever liked, and
all the leisure activities you ever enjoyed, and all the natural beauties
you ever saw, all the physical pleasures you ever tasted, and no
human conflict or any natural disasters, could you be satisfied with
heaven, if Christ were not there?"

That actually sounds VERY much like me. I'm extremely scared, because I don't WANT to be this way. I want to be happy with just Jesus, but I'm not. I want to have a genuine love for him, but I don't. I want to see and know Jesus, but I can't get myself to that place. I can't change my heart to truly desire God. Does this mean I'm just going to die and go to Hell? Is there NOTHING I can do to change the way I am? I've even heard people say that I can't, but I can go to Jesus and he will change me, but I'm not even sure of how that works. I'm extremely scared, and in need of some serious help.

and for more background: I am 19 and thought I was truly saved until very recently. I have a lot of church background and know all about Christ loving us and dying for our sins. I know that it is a "free" gift and everything, but I've recently become aware of the "heart knowledge vs. head knowledge" issue. I have always intended to follow God and do his will, but I never thought about the importance of my motives, or actually knowing him. I even heard the lingo of having "a personal relationship" with Jesus, but always thought that just meant reading the word and praying, which I do try to always do. Now I see people like Francis Chan and John Piper talking about loving Jesus in this sense and I think I might be missing something huge.

Love is developed. Like in any relationship. Think about God/Jesus. Try to see what you like about him.

If you observe a relationship and being in love, you will see that both parties constantly think about each other and that's what's making them fall in love more and more. Once they stop thinking about each other, they cool off.

Don't see God as religion or a means of salvation. Think of him as a person you could relate to. Start from there. And maybe you will fall in love. God is a person. He is not just a boat to escape damnation. He is not a bar of soap to wash off the sins. He is a person. And as such he requires communication and fellowship just like a person. He loves to hear us talk to him. He sometimes talks back... See salvation as an engagement ring. The Bride does not fall in love with the engagement ring or doesn't marry the person in order to get the engagement ring. She marries the person because she loves the person. And the ring is just a bonus. See salvation as a bonus of your relationship. But make communing with God your focus. Read books about getting closer to God and about intimacy with God and maybe that will help.

 

[TheEndIsHere]

If I'm completely honest with myself, I really just must not understand. I've grown up with all this head knowledge, and I feel like I honestly do have ZERO heart knowledge. I have heard everything everyone has said, and it all makes SENSE to me, but it has failed to stick in my heart. I've spent every other day feeling a different feeling about God.

I DON'T really have any faith at all. I see God change other people. I see other people actually in LOVE with Christ. I see people who genuinely want what he wants ABOVE what they wants. That isn't like me at all! I am so selfish and prideful. I really do just want what I want. I don't just want Heaven per se, but all I think about is wanting the feelings that other people have-The Christian life style, the faith, and yes, Heaven is part of it. All I can think about is what I want God to do FOR me. I want peace, joy, and God's love, but I really have no clue in my heart who he even is. I can't seem to shift my thinking to what God wants. I'm so focused on how evil I am that I can't force myself to see how "good" he is. I know in my HEAD that he is good, and helps anyone who asks, but somewhere deep inside I feel like he does that for everyone but me....because I have a fear that deep deep down that isn't even what I really want.

It's the idea of reading my bible every free moment I get. Having to make every single moment of my life bring glory to God. It's so much pressure. I honestly LIKE to just waste time every once in a while. I feel like that is sinful. If I really loved Jesus wouldn't I WANT to read the bible and pray all day. Wouldn't that be what I liked doing in leisure time? It just doesn't describe who I am.

I think the central issue is that I have no faith or trust in my heart that God will change me. I know in my head that he changes people and have seen people changed, but I keep thinking it's not the case for me. A lot of mixed up theology has gotten in my head incorrectly making me think that God only wants to save some people, and lately I feel like I am not one of them. What if that is the case? What if I just wasn't chosen, and that is why I can't understand, and why I am so wrong about so many things? I know I don't get it yet, and I need help getting it, but I feel like at this point none of the go-to answers will work because in my head I do know them all. I just haven't internalized the message, and need help doing so.

 

[TheEndIsHere]

I thought of another way to phrase one thing I am also feeling. Something that makes a lot of Christians initially fall in love with Jesus is the idea that he died for THEIR sins. This is the part I can't fully grasp for two main reasons:

1. It feels very impersonal to me. It feels like God died for ALL sinners. God loves EVERYONE. It doesn't feel like I'm anything special to him. Very self-centered, I know...but that is the nature of the sinner that I am and that you are dealing with.

2. It doesn't ever feel to me, like it cost that much. Sure Jesus bled and died, but didn't he know that he'd rise from the dead and be in Heaven shortly. It doesn't feel like it cost him that much. I know, I know, it was extremely painful and he didn't have to do it. I KNOW I take it for granted, and I know I'm wrong in that...but again, this is part of what I mean when I say I KNOW I'm messed up. I don't WANT to think this way, but I do. I'm deeply tormented by my own thought processes.

 

[paul1149]

TEIH,

I believe that many of us experience the head/heart disparity to varying degrees and at varying times in our lives. The further I get along, the more I see that it really is Jesus who is the captain of my faith, and I can set aside my own miserable attempts to do what is right, feel what is right, etc – the futile struggle Paul describes in Rom 7 – and accept His peace.

A couple of points. Regarding the crucifixion, as physically horrendous as it was, spiritually it was worse. Jesus went into it as a perfect, sinless man, and indeed as the Son of God. He was exquisitely sensitive to things of the spirit. And He became completely cut off and abandoned by God during His passion. With our dullness, we cannot understand how this must have felt, as He took upon Himself the weight of the world's sin in addition to the physical pain. But it points to an astonishing love that He would do it for us. Our "task" is to tap into that love and live it out.

Second, Jesus explained to the Pharisees, who knew God pretty well intellectually according to the law, but many of whom were missing the Big Thing that He was doing in Christ, that he who is forgiven much, loves much. If we come to an understanding of our utter helplessness in terms of meriting God's approval and eternal life, and how completely unnecessary it was in any legal or even moral sense for the Lord to pay the price of our forgiveness, we finally become convinced of the measure of His love for us, because it's the only way to explain His actions.

Still, even understanding all that is no guarantee that it will sink down to the heart. That is a sovereign work of the Lord. We should seek it, we should prepare the way for it, we should dedicate ourselves to achieving it. But ultimately it is the Lord who grants the grace awakening in each of our hearts. This is why it is no cliché to say that the greatest miracle of all is salvation and being reconciled to God.

The good news is that God will do it. He has given His word that He will do so. He is the author and finisher of salvation, He will perfect that which concerns us, and He will complete the work He has begun, until the day of Christ Jesus.

And so the answer is to seek Him, yes, by all means, but to do so with a positive expectant faith, as the book of James tells us in chapter one. Just try to be honest with Him, knowing He can take it, but keep turning to Him with that trust. That opens you up to the grace He wants to provide, and with patience and persistence you are going to come out on the victory side.

 

[heymikey80]

To 2 - I think contemporary media makes it very hard to simply talk through this kind of situation. Yeah, it's awfully easy to listen to the words of a sermon and not feel their full effect.

Something that was compelling to me recently was watching "the Passion of Christ". But ... if you're not used to raw violence, brace yourself.

To 1 - It's actually an odd thing, because there really isn't something that makes you special in comparison with anyone else. In reality, the sole thing that makes you special is that you're loved by the God of the Universe in a particular sense -- a saving sense for the New Creation. That gets weirder and weirder as you live more. I grew up following cosmology. It's a strange feeling, to see galaxies cartwheeling through the depths, and consider that God has an interest in small creatures on a little blue planet. But I figure that's because my interest is so often different from God's.

 

[klatyla]

Brother, because the enemy knows you are coming to closer to God he will play tricks with your mind, thoughts, and make you think of every weakness, negativity in your life to use against you and God. You know the word of God, yes in theory, but, its doesnt mean it means nothing. It means you know more than enough, Amen, he has given you the word to stand on, we dont go on feelings, but stand on the word of God even though our feelings and everything around us seems chaotic, just stand on what you know is the word of God, and let God do the rest. Dont be anxious, so dont be, god gives us a sound mind, so you have a sound mind, take every thought captive in the obedience of Jesus Christ, so once your mind starts wandering SMASH it with the Word of God with your mouth so it will manifest in the atmosphere and not let the enemy have his way with you.
Ephesians 6: 10 12
Finally be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power.
Put on the full armour of God so that you can take you stand against the devils schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood but against the rulers against the authorities against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

The choice is yours, God is same today yesterday and tommorrow nothing ever changes with God not even the Word of God that you already know, so make the choice, speak the Word of God into the atmosphere, because it is a spiritual battle, the enemy wants you, but God needs you to speak what you already know, with your mouth aloud, because the power is in the Word of God, what you have already attained for this moment in your life to use against the enemy. Amen. God will never give up on you, so dont give up on him, no matter what, he will NEVER leave you his promise to you.

Use the sword of the lord where there is power and authority.