Age in Relationships

[pro_odeh]

Everyone matures in diffrent ages. Some are later than others, but I doubt anyone before 18 are ready for marrage, even if they think so themselves, or actually do get married..

 

[jesusfreak3786]

I suggest reading the Quran instead, it makes more sense, and is still in it's original text without going through multiple translators/translations.

The Bible is also accurate.

 

[morningstar2651]

Why can't a 15 year old be mature?

In one word: Puberty

I garauntee that when your dad discovers that you hid this from him, he will be angrier than if you told him in the first place.

 

[Electric Sceptic]

I could care less if people agree with me, infact I stated I do not plan to convert anyones opinions. I have not complained about anything except for being misunderstood.

Then I have to wonder why you are bothering posting to this forum at all.

As for "I have not complained about anything except for being misunderstood," again, let's see...

You said:

"No one hear is taking anything I am saying with consideration nor an open mind and are reviling me."

Here you have complated that (a) nobody else on this forum is acting with consideration, (b) nobody else on this forum has an open mind, and (c) everyone else on this forum is 'reviling' you.

Looks like your claim that you "have not complained about anything except for being misunderstood" was false, too.

The fact you are still talking about it tells me otherwise... we obviously have different opinions on peace.

It appears so. I think that peace (as far as discussion goes) is various people putting forward their opinions and discussing each others'; you think it is nobody disagreeing with you. In that case, I'd warn you that you'll never find your version of 'peace' on these forums...or, indeed, anywhere outside your own bedroom.

From a very human and wordly prospective, I agree.

The human and worldly perspective is the only one we - any of us - has or can have. We are all human, and cannot be anything else; we all live in the world, and cannot live anywhere else.

When one compares the vanity and quickness of this world to the awards in heaven and breaking a covenant which was never to be broken, it becomes much less relevant.

Oops! Another mistake. Even Jesus said it can be broken, as a result of adultery.

It's a thing called faith, and I know stories of many abused who had it, and they now have God fearing, non violent husbands that are now saved by the Lord.

No offence, but I do not believe you.

To me, telling a women to divorce her husband after the first hit without questions ask or seeking any help is bad advice.

And I think telling a woman to stay with a husband who abuses her under any circumstances is bad advice. And you know what? So do the people who have made helping women in this situation their lives.

Would I blame a woman for a getting a divorce in this situation? Absolutly not. Would I encourage her to get a divorce? I would tell her everything I have said here on this thread and let her make her God given choice.

Then I fervently hope you never encounter any woman who is abused by her husband, and if you do, I fervently hope she takes absolutely no notice of your advice.

 

[Electric Sceptic]

The Bible is also accurate.

Except, of course, for the myriad places it is inaccurate.

 

[Dukey]

Hello there. I have a question for all of you. So, I'm fifteen and my boyfriend's nineteen...a lot of people freak out about that. My dad doesn't have the slightest clue I'm going out with anyone, much less a 19 yo...my mother on the other hand knows about it and is fine with it. Both are Christians as am I. Personally, I don't see anything wrong with our relationship, but I'd like to know what everyone here thinks of age differences in relationships.

ive dated a few people with a fifteen year age difference....most of its about maturity levels

 

[jesusfreak3786]

Except, of course, for the myriad places it is inaccurate.

I don't find any inaccuracys. The bible is spiritual, and worldly. These two realities arn't past the possability of contridicting each other, if this is recorded, I don't see how the word is contradictary.

 

[SallyNow]

I think any 19 year old who thinks it is okay to date a 15 year old and and get serious before the youngest in the relationship is 18 has not yet matured. Any 19 year old who is maturing knows very well that 15 is still very young, and a lot of changes and experiences are ahead. If a 19 year old is love with a 15 year old, by all means, be good friends until the 15 year old is 18. But not "more than" friends.

After 18, age differenes of more than 4 or 5 years often don't work. After 30, age differences of 10 years seem to be okay...but of course, it is all on a case-by-case basis!

But again...a 15 year old paired romantically with a 19 year old is not a good idea. If the OP's boyfriend can not just stay friends until she is 18, or at least in Grade 12, he is probably not mature enough to be dating yet.

 

[Electric Sceptic]

I don't find any inaccuracys. The bible is spiritual, and worldly. These two realities arn't past the possability of contridicting each other, if this is recorded, I don't see how the word is contradictary.

Then you should look more thoroughly, without an agenda that directs that the bible is inerrant. It contains many, many contradictions. Very few - if any - impact its spiritual message, which is why most christians are happy to accept their existence.

 

[Chrono Traveler]

I think any 19 year old who thinks it is okay to date a 15 year old and and get serious before the youngest in the relationship is 18 has not yet matured. Any 19 year old who is maturing knows very well that 15 is still very young, and a lot of changes and experiences are ahead. If a 19 year old is love with a 15 year old, by all means, be good friends until the 15 year old is 18. But not "more than" friends.

After 18, age differenes of more than 4 or 5 years often don't work. After 30, age differences of 10 years seem to be okay...but of course, it is all on a case-by-case basis!

But again...a 15 year old paired romantically with a 19 year old is not a good idea. If the OP's boyfriend can not just stay friends until she is 18, or at least in Grade 12, he is probably not mature enough to be dating yet.

Sorry, still can't assume anything but from what I herd, I don't know her, so I don't know how mature hshe can be. I have a friend whos almost 18(hes like 17 3/4) Went out with my friend whos 16. She had a terrible time, because he acts as if he was 12 sometimes.

This is less about age than maturity, if she was 16 or 17 there would really be no issue at all.

 

[jesusfreak3786]

Then you should look more thoroughly, without an agenda that directs that the bible is inerrant. It contains many, many contradictions. Very few - if any - impact its spiritual message, which is why most christians are happy to accept their existence.

These contradictions are, just that in opinion, I have concentrated on these so called contradictions, and they are perfectly accurate and plausable. Out of all the supossenly contradictory statements I have studied I have always come to the conclution that they appear contradictory, but in fact are not. Some times this is due to changes thru time, and custums. Think of it this way, if God told you to travel to the city and profisies by saddling up your donkey it would be quit strange, same as if He told josef to get in his car, and go to syracuse, things need to chang to a certian extent to conform to avialable resorces, laws, and customs.

 

[xxRachaelxx]

Hello there. I have a question for all of you. So, I'm fifteen and my boyfriend's nineteen...a lot of people freak out about that. My dad doesn't have the slightest clue I'm going out with anyone, much less a 19 yo...my mother on the other hand knows about it and is fine with it. Both are Christians as am I. Personally, I don't see anything wrong with our relationship, but I'd like to know what everyone here thinks of age differences in relationships.

if it is right for you....then dont worry what other people say.

there isnt a law where u HAVE to be the same age!

i have a similar problem with my boyfriend. he is sikh and i am catholic. my mum is fine with it, and my dad doesnt have a clue that im with him....

you could be VERY happy together, so dont let peoples negative opinions come between u

 

[SallyNow]

there isnt a law where u HAVE to be the same age!

Actually, there are. In many places it is illegal for 15 year old to have sexual relations with a 19 year old. I don't have a problem with adults dating adults...although huge age differences is a little wierd. But before adult age, well, there is a reason there is a difference between teenage and adults. Believe me, at 15 or 16, there are a lot of changes ahead. At 17, many mature teens have the core of themselves there. But there is a lot of changing that happens!

Again, though, friendships of this kind can be really benificial and wonderful, so don't forget the possibility, if you dad does find out, of being friends with the guy until you're 18.

 

[ajm122188]

If I had a 15-year-old sister, and she was dating a 19-year-old, being protective I would make her stop dating him. There's only one thing a guy wants from a much younger girl..

 

[Chrono Traveler]

Actually, there are. In many places it is illegal for 15 year old to have sexual relations with a 19 year old. I don't have a problem with adults dating adults...although huge age differences is a little wierd. But before adult age, well, there is a reason there is a difference between teenage and adults. Believe me, at 15 or 16, there are a lot of changes ahead. At 17, many mature teens have the core of themselves there. But there is a lot of changing that happens!

Again, though, friendships of this kind can be really benificial and wonderful, so don't forget the possibility, if you dad does find out, of being friends with the guy until you're 18.

oh...keyword..."Sexual relations" she already made it clear that its not that.

 

[SallyNow]

Yes...it is not sexual. But that can happen.

However...even it is not about sex, there is still wisdom in waiting until both parties have at least finished, or are about to finish, high school. I'm not saying they can't see each other, I'm not saying it is horrible. I am saying it is a good idea to stay friends until both parties are at least around 18. This shows maturity on both sides, and allows for some important maturity to take place.

 

[Chrono Traveler]

Yes...it is not sexual. But that can happen.

However...even it is not about sex, there is still wisdom in waiting until both parties have at least finished, or are about to finish, high school. I'm not saying they can't see each other, I'm not saying it is horrible. I am saying it is a good idea to stay friends until both parties are at least around 18. This shows maturity on both sides, and allows for some important maturity to take place.

sure, but I still think they should be able to show they love eachother. Like I said, I am waiting for someone myself. 3 years younger, not 4. Im thinking it would be ok to wait one year when shes 17...Shell be out of highschool by then too.

 

[pro_odeh]

If you wait for something good, you can never wait too long!

 

[Chrono Traveler]

If you wait for something good, you can never wait too long!

lol, yes...shes very upset about it tho...kinda forced it on her to wait.

 

[Electric Sceptic]

If I had a 15-year-old sister, and she was dating a 19-year-old, being protective I would make her stop dating him.

You might call it protective; no doubt she (and others, including me) would have other words to describe it.

There's only one thing a guy wants from a much younger girl..

There might be only one thing you could ever want from a much younger girl; to imagine that that is true of all guys is simply arrogant.