Advice?

[meredithgood]

ok so i need some advice, ive been in a relationship for over three years, but its only been in the past few months ive been reconnecting with God. and yes we have slept together and i know this is a sin. however hes the only guy ive ever been with and we live together. im not sure what to do as because i know sex before marriage is a sin but then it wouldnt be fair on him if i told him i was never going to be with him again out of the blue...

id love to know if any people have advice or just a general input

thanks guys

 

[RobertMerton]

Hi Meridith.

First of all hello Aussie haha.

Second of all, it is great that you are re-connecting with God,
and you are right in saying that it wouldn't be fair on him.

However, the bible is very clear on issues regarding Sin, and particularly sexual sin.

Jesus went so far as to say that (I am paraphrasing), if your right eye causes you to sin, rip it out, and throw it out as it's better that you enter the kingdom of God without an eye, than not entering the Kingdom of God at all.
Similarly, If your right arm causes you to sin, rip it out, and throw it out.

The above is not to be taken literally, (as our eyes/arms have caused us a great deal of sin in countless times), however when it comes to things that are separable for instance a boyfriend, then that is what you should do.

I am guessing that he is not a christian.
Let him know where you are at, and see how he responds.
If he allows for you to move out, and respects your wishes for sexual purity, or even if he is willing to become a christian ( a true christian) then that is good.

If he isn't, or doesn't like the idea of you going back to the Lord, then cut him out of your life. It is as simple as that.

 

[johenah1633]

Hi Mer. I don't know much but i do know that this is wonderful news that you are reconnecting with God! This is the one relationship that won't let you down. On the other hand, you are right, a relationship that involves sex outside of marriage is unhealthy. I as a male suggest that you be completely honest with him and talk about the direction you wish to take the relationship. Most importantly PRAY!!! God bless, good luck.

 

[Tylyr]

Second of all, it is great that you are re-connecting with God,
and you are right in saying that it wouldn't be fair on him.

However, the bible is very clear on issues regarding Sin, and particularly sexual sin.

Yes, it is wonderful that you are re-connecting with God! And no, it's not too fair on him either...

But before you just break up with him, why not try considering his thoughts on the issue? I'm all about relationships and I hate to see a couple break up over a miss-communication. I say put all your thoughts down in front of him and see how he reacts! Maybe he'll want to go along with you with the idea, who knows! At the very least you won't just be breaking up with him "out of the blue," at least he'll have some sort of an idea why if you just talk to him about it.

Just because you have already had sex with him doesn't mean that you can't start over fresh with him. I suggest just trying it out to see how it goes!

 

[Sketcher]

Is marriage on the horizon for you two, or not?

 

[meredithgood]

yep, we talked about it a while ago but our issue was that neither of us have enough money nor were in the right circumstances (we're living in a sharehouse with three others), because hes still at university and im only working part time in a retail job marriage was not in the immediate future for us, but yes short answer we are planning on getting married eventually haha

 

[AndrewZinc]

Although marriage might seem like the answer - so you are not sinning - marrying someone who doesn't share your faith is inherently risky and therefore is discouraged in the Bible. You can't change the past, but you can decide what is more important to you now. God or your boyfriend.

I agree that you should be honest with him. Put God first, move out if you find you are still sleeping with him, and pray for him. People can become Christians through their loved ones but you can't assume that will happen.

You must be wise, and that might mean being ruthless when it comes to sin, even at the risk of causing hurt or misunderstanding.

 

[Maka]

ok so i need some advice, ive been in a relationship for over three years, but its only been in the past few months ive been reconnecting with God. and yes we have slept together and i know this is a sin. however hes the only guy ive ever been with and we live together. im not sure what to do as because i know sex before marriage is a sin but then it wouldnt be fair on him if i told him i was never going to be with him again out of the blue...

id love to know if any people have advice or just a general input

thanks guys

Don't keep sinning because you feel it's not fair to him. Your relationship with God should come first, if he truly loves you he will understand.

Although marriage might seem like the answer - so you are not sinning - marrying someone who doesn't share your faith is inherently risky and therefore is discouraged in the Bible. You can't change the past, but you can decide what is more important to you now. God or your boyfriend.

I agree that you should be honest with him. Put God first, move out if you find you are still sleeping with him, and pray for him. People can become Christians through their loved ones but you can't assume that will happen.

You must be wise, and that might mean being ruthless when it comes to sin, even at the risk of causing hurt or misunderstanding.

^ I agree with this!