Acedia

[SamanthaAnastasia]

I’m curious if I’m struggling with acedia. I mean, I think we all do on some level but I’m trying to figure out if my situation is actually acedia.

So, some examples are given that monks would be despondent and desire to go to different monasteries.

Now (I am of course no monk lol) but I find that despondent because of my house.

It makes me sad that it’s so massive. I feel oppressed by it.

Mind you I’ve never ever felt this way about a place I’ve lived.

Well, maybe when I lived with my parents (but that was due to my father NOT the actual house).

There are rooms I haven’t been in for months.

Combine the house size along with the fact that I never leave (no job, one car) and I have no one really outside of my husband (no kids, no friends really) and I feel idk

I keep holding on to these things:

1. I am grateful that I have a home; while it is too big and it makes me suffer mentally, there are so many people that physically have no homes - no where to safely sleep. I shouldn’t be ungrateful.
2. I’m moving soon.

I just don’t have anyone else to talk to about this. My parents don’t understand, really. My husband thinks I’m just complaining.


I just makes me want to shut down and go further into myself.

But I can’t.


Again, I’ve never felt this way about a house. I’ve felt this way basically since the moment we moved in.


It’s exhausting. And I feel guilty about feeling this way.

Death to Despondency Part III: The Fear of Death and the Reversal of Joy
^^Nice read about acedia

 

[Johnny Ross]

-Has the House been blessed by a Priest yet?
-Have a BBQ and invite people from Church over
-Offer to Host a Bible Study there
-Volunteer somewhere, that will help get you out of the house

 

[ArmyMatt]

Lord have mercy! I agree to talk to your priest.

 

[SamanthaAnastasia]

-Has the House been blessed by a Priest yet?
-Have a BBQ and invite people from Church over
-Offer to Host a Bible Study there
-Volunteer somewhere, that will help get you out of the house

Lord have mercy! I agree to talk to your priest.

No, it hasnt. Thought I do bless it with holy water (but I’m not a priest of course!!).
I only have one car and my husbands schedule is always changing so I never really know when I can do things. It’s been a problem but it’ll be okay. We move in September (maybe August).
I’m just glad I can formulate my words here before I go and talk to my priest.
I tend to ramble. It doesn’t help now that I don’t see people much lol

 

[ArmyMatt]

Thought I do bless it with holy water (but I’m not a priest of course!!).

it can also help to drink holy water first thing every morning aside from when you have a morning Liturgy.

 

[SamanthaAnastasia]

it can also help to drink holy water first thing every morning aside from when you have a morning Liturgy.

Thank you, Father.

 

[ArmyMatt]

Thank you, Father.

no problem

 

[rusmeister]

I totally hear you on despondency and isolation. I feel wholly unqualified to give “wise advice” when I struggle with it myself. I generally cycle through the question of whether what led me to faith has been proven wrong, and the answer being “No, it’s true”, to the follow-up, “Well, go to church, avail yourself of the Sacraments, and soldier on”. I don’t even worry about the rules as such (is that acedia?), I try to resist temptation and sin and to do good and love my neighbor as commanded, and hang in there.

In “Raiders of the Lost Ark”, when Indy is drunk and talking to Belloq, he says, “You want to talk to God? Let’s go see Him together. I have nothing better to do.” That last sentence, “I have nothing better to do”, just echoes in my mind. It’s true. We have nothing better to do.

And try to get out, somehow. Make outside contacts, preferably female for you, a woman. You’ve got another month or two in that place - that’s not so long. Then double down on the good advice you do get.

God bless! It’s hard, and I know what the feeling of loneliness is like, even with a wife and kids who aren’t much into my Anglo-world things, with whom I am lucky if I can share anything at all.