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[Danigt22]

You've used a very nice word there.

For me, altruism comes before anything else. Perfection isn't what I'm looking for - as long as she's genuinely altruistic, the rest is just minor detail.

I've met women in the past who ticked all of my superficial 'criteria' - but when push came to shove, they wouldn't lift a finger to help anyone. Most of them wouldn't even apologise for bumping into you.

It stands to reason doesn't it? Altruistic wife = GOOD mother. Why would I want to marry a woman who spends two thirds of her life counting the likes on her selfie as she walks straight past the homeless person? Answer: I wouldn't.

Humility is a key element too. We all have dreams - the LORD knows I have mine, but set goals, work furiously towards them, pull all nighters, work a mind numbing job to stash the money up to FUND your projects, take pride in your stalwart work ethic, don't just do ONE thing once and expect it to all land in your lap. You'd be amazed at how many egotistical, bone-idle, brats I know. A cruel assessment, but it's got to be said.

Yes, it's curable - and NO, I'm not convinced that it's their true character, but for as long as they're like that I'm swiping them left. I don't want to be an OnlyFans hubby. Or married to a pair of eyebrows.

Other than that, I don't expect a lot. Humility and altruism are the two main components. Two traits any human being anywhere in the world can have right NOW if they want them.

Bonus points for: creativity, quirkiness, weird fashion, self deprecating humour, quality banter, empathy for animals and NOT a Tory!

Humility is great quality, it shows you serve others rather than yourself. Humility allows us to love freely.

 

[Lost4words]

Pup,

As an astute pup you've seen your share of good and bad. In your opinion, what did you enjoy most about the ladies? We know you're smitten by scent, but don't be shy. After all, you know the humans much better than we do. Give us the scoop! ;-)

Yours in His Service,

~Bella

Well, most of the ladies i have been around have been very kind and caring to be honest. Always friendly and treated me nicely. Always made a fuss of me to be honest.

They always wanted to give me a cuddle, even though we had only just met! Some smothered me in kisses too! Ewwww!

What i found nice was the treats they always had for me. Except that it did mean that on some occasions i had to sit and give them my paw to get one?

But, like all the ladies that wanted to go out with me, they all demanded that i was tied up and 'taken' to places 'they' wanted to go to! What is it with women and collars and leads?

 

[ReesePiece23]

Well, most of the ladies i have been around have been very kind and caring to be honest. Always friendly and treated me nicely. Always made a fuss of me to be honest.

They always wanted to give me a cuddle, even though we had only just met! Some smothered me in kisses too! Ewwww!

What i found nice was the treats they always had for me. Except that it did mean that on some occasions i had to sit and give them my paw to get one?

But, like all the ladies that wanted to go out with me, they all demanded that i was tied up and 'taken' to places 'they' wanted to go to! What is it with women and collars and leads?

I can't help but imagine a dog, sat at a desk with little round glasses on, typing away at these forum replies when his owner isn't looking.

How do you cope with the ring binders? I'd imagine a Filofax being easier on the paws.

 

[Lost4words]

I can't help but imagine a dog, sat at a desk with little round glasses on, typing away at these forum replies when his owner isn't looking.

How do you cope with the ring binders? I'd imagine a Filofax being easier on the paws.

My PC is in a secret location in the attic. I use a special hidden stairway to get to the secret room!

And yes, i do wear glasses! I found them in the garage.

All my documents are stored digitally. Plus, nobody can open them without my 'paw mark'.

 

[ReesePiece23]

My PC is in a secret location in the attic. I use a special hidden stairway to get to the secret room!

And yes, i do wear glasses! I found them in the garage.

All my documents are stored digitally. Plus, nobody can open them without my 'paw mark'.

What can I say? You've thought of everything!

 

[Lost4words]

What can I say? You've thought of everything!

I went to a specail university and after many years of study i got a 'Dogtorate' in human study

 

[Junia]

I went to a specail university and after many years of study i got a 'Dogtorate' in human study

I
I love your posts. Like all dogs, you make me smile!! ❤❤❤

 

[bèlla]

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[bèlla]

It means acts of service, it is a way to show love.
Feel needed is just that, if the other person doesnt need us, where is the room for charity or servitude. Two powerful languages of love.

Danigt,

Your comment on need brushes against a popular sentiment. "I don't need a man." However, you've pinpointed the downside to that line of thought. It diminishes charity and servitude. You're left with self-focused interactions.

Wonderful insight. Thank you.

Yours in His Service,

~Bella

 

[bèlla]

For me, altruism comes before anything else. Perfection isn't what I'm looking for - as long as she's genuinely altruistic, the rest is just minor detail.

Reese,

Thank you for weighing in. Can you talk about altruism a little more please? How does that look on a daily basis from your perspective? How can she increase that quality?

You'd be amazed at how many egotistical, bone-idle, brats I know. A cruel assessment, but it's got to be said.

How would you advise someone to nurture humility in a culture which values the opposite? What steps would you recommend on their behalf?

Yours in His Service,

~Bella

 

[bèlla]

.

 

[MehGuy]

What resonates with you and stimulates your masculinity like nothing can?


~Bella

As far as the psychological, it is mainly weakness and vulnerability. This can come in many different forms. Even small things like a woman who's natural language is not English and struggles with the words and pronunciation can really perk my ears up and make me drawn to her. One could like these things for bad reasons, although for most men I suspect it's simply a healthy outlet to feel masculine, and a large part of that is taking care of a woman.

As far as the physical, neotenous cues like a highly neotenous face are highly attractive for me. I like large eyes and full lips and a feminine nose. While women report to liking larger men in order to feel safe and feminine, the opposite of that is men liking women to be smaller than them in order to feel like a protector and masculine. Probably a big reason why culturally men make a bigger deal about weight than women.

I really need the two. A larger woman is not really going to fulfill these needs for me. While I do not expect a supermodel or anything, if she doesn't hit certain feminine physical targets the psychological is really a no-go.

 

[bèlla]

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[MehGuy]

Meh,

It's fitting you'd mention the pair. This isn't a subject I entertain with most. But we've been around the bend many times.

Yeah, I'd user deeper terminology but I'm just too tired at the moment.. lol.

Can you delve deeper on the value of vulnerability in the fairer sex please?

Well, it's the evolved state of man. Women are the ones who give birth, thus they are more valuable than men pound for pound. Consequently our ancestors who developed a strong positive emotional reaction towards vulnerable women and having an urge to help and protect them passed their genes on compared to men who did not.

How does it affect you?

Gives me a warm glowing feeling. If she's cute, it makes me develop strong feelings for her.

Do believe its easier for women to embrace those qualities or harder now?

In most ways things haven't changed. Feminists often spend time talking about how everything in the world somehow "oppresses" them. They're some of the biggest damsel in distress acting women in the world. Like I said before, it's hardwired into our biology. Something like feminism is not going to get rid of it, often times feminism just exasperates it.

How can we attune ourselves to vulnerability and welcome our weaknesses without feeling inadequate or invisible in your opinion? Thank you for weighing in.

Thing is, many women like to feel inadequate. Contrary to being invisible, it often makes women very visible. Most social services are highly bias towards women and many times exclusive to them. Reminds me of this PSA I once saw that said something like 40% of women are homeless. With no mention of the 60% of homeless men, lol.

 

[Lost4words]

Pup,

Your superpowers are legendary. I imagine you cause quite a stir when you're out and about. Rumor has it you strut on occasion. But that's our secret.

From your vantage point its clear that kindness and caring have a significant impact on her behavior. They inspire a nice and friendly demeanor. It could be you of course. But for the sake of the discussion we'll give her some credit.

In your human alter ego, are these the qualities you value most?

Yours in His Service,

~Bella

Yes. I like a lady who is pleasing to the eye, mainly my right eye. Softly spoken with a caring and loving nature. Her being a Christian is much more important these days too. Good sense of humour would be nice too. But, i have no plans or desires to link up with anyone. I prefer my own company these days.

 

[Tony B]

Not at all. Thank you for asking.

I believe it begins with nature and nurture. Children learn what they live. We can adopt new behaviors and ideals as adults. But time is an important factor in character development. Especially during impressionable periods.

Being exposed to Christian examples of healthy masculinity and femininity throughout had a profound effect on my ideologies about the sexes. Men aren't a threat or an oppressor I must lift my hands against. Nor my enemy. I see him as God's creation as are women.

Thus, I'm not a gladiator and this isn't a fight to the death. I am conscious of the duality between the sexes and appreciate the otherness we bring to the picture. I have no interest in being a man or competing against him. I'm wholly content in my place. I love being a woman.

Occupying the feminine space isn't contingent on perfection. I can't move into his sphere. Where will he go? And who occupies the place I've left? I must remain where I'm meant.

A hallmark of that is gentleness and softness. Remaining in that state requires intention. No matter what happens between us; I can't move away. I have to respond in kind to handle his strength. Otherwise we're like hard stones cutting against the other. One will break. I'm the weaker of the pair. It will be me.

Embracing my femininity is a must. As is the necessity of genteel behavior and practices that enrich the internal and outer self. It isn't enough to appear to be ladylike. I want to be an asset to my companion and a blessing to others. To exude love and kindness authentically.

Faith is the avenue for refinement and spiritual homecoming. We have different starting points but God's sloughing can smooth away the unpleasantness and impart a loveliness and gentility we lack. But we must submit to the process and welcome input from our brothers. We can't uphold our ideas as sacred cows. Everything is subject to scrutiny and transformation by the Master's hand.

The deeper our connection to the Lord's perspective on womanliness; the greater our regard for His masculine counterpart. When you understand your divinity you'll welcome his in turn. And you encounter the beauty of His craftsmanship in each.

God is the author of our essence. Everything begins with Him.

Yours in His Service,

~Bella

What a great response, thank you for sharing. If I had a daughter that needed mentoring, I would ask you to do that if you were willing.

I hope the younger ladies in our midst run their eyes over what you have written, it's really good counsel from my male perspective.

The only thing I would say though, is no Christian sister of mine should be put under duress by an overbearing Christian brother of mine in any situation, particularly in respect of a marriage. Any differences between them must be worked out amicably without fear of any kind of abuse. Maybe I'm being a bit idealistic, but I can't see how true love and oppression can coexist in any form.

 

[GTW27]

Gentlemen,

Please lend me your ear. Ladies are beset with many voices. But wise ones know to seek the source and I'm addressing you.

Never mind Vogue, Cosmopolitan, and popular programs. In your opinion, what defines a woman's essence? The qualities you enjoy and can't encounter elsewhere.

What resonates with you and stimulates your masculinity like nothing can?

I appreciate your honesty and willingness to enlighten us.

Yours in His Service,

~Bella

To behold a beautiful woman is quit a sight to behold, often to the point of weakness as it did David. But I consider this as nothingness compared to seeing my Beloved(The Lord) in the eyes of a woman, in the words of her lips, and the actions of her doings. This I have seen, although it is rare, and it caused me to be instantly in The Spirit. Two strangers, and yet One in our Beloved.

 

[bèlla]

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[bèlla]

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[Tone]

Gentlemen,

Please lend me your ear. Ladies are beset with many voices. But wise ones know to seek the source and I'm addressing you.

Never mind Vogue, Cosmopolitan, and popular programs. In your opinion, what defines a woman's essence? The qualities you enjoy and can't encounter elsewhere.

What resonates with you and stimulates your masculinity like nothing can?

I appreciate your honesty and willingness to enlighten us.

Yours in His Service,

~Bella

A woman's or a wife's?