52 and still single

[JES1023]

So being 52 and single is hard enough; but when you have a good idea why, it not only makes it suck but I've learn to hate myself and question how am i fearfully and wonderfully made?

So April 2017 finally after years of seeing my doctor who never notice this problem but thought my diabetes might be causing the problem that is when he 1st discover I was Type 2 diabetic but still after keeping my blood sugar in check it reared it ugly head time after time. That along with my high blood pressure he sent me to a specialist for this problem so I thought praise God maybe something can be done.

So I see the Specialist but 1st see her assistant says she notice nothing. So the Specialist walks in and I tell her how I have had people say to my face very rudely I STINK immediately after showering. She tells me she notices a smell, I think to myself thank God finally going to get somewhere with this. But she can't describe it. After geting tested and after so many bills I can't afford it.

So at work this morning pretty sure my boss made a statement referring to me smelling; after I showered.

The mental anguish this problem is causing me is limitless. If even after I shower I stink how am i fearfully or wonderfully made and why approach a gal if you have a good chance of offending her nose?

So perhaps I should say 52 and forever single. By the way for those who understand my last A1C reading was 8.8 way to high but I just don't care about my diet if I eat healthy and still smell. So it may be getting even higher.

God is to good to be unkind so very confuse as I receive His justice and wonder were is the sure mercies of Christ Jesus.

 

[God bless Joshua]

Just buy some perfume or deodorant.

 

[dreadnought]

So being 52 and single is hard enough; but when you have a good idea why, it not only makes it suck but I've learn to hate myself and question how am i fearfully and wonderfully made?

So April 2017 finally after years of seeing my doctor who never notice this problem but thought my diabetes might be causing the problem that is when he 1st discover I was Type 2 diabetic but still after keeping my blood sugar in check it reared it ugly head time after time. That along with my high blood pressure he sent me to a specialist for this problem so I thought praise God maybe something can be done.

So I see the Specialist but 1st see her assistant says she notice nothing. So the Specialist walks in and I tell her how I have had people say to my face very rudely I STINK immediately after showering. She tells me she notices a smell, I think to myself thank God finally going to get somewhere with this. But she can't describe it. After geting tested and after so many bills I can't afford it.

So at work this morning pretty sure my boss made a statement referring to me smelling; after I showered.

The mental anguish this problem is causing me is limitless. If even after I shower I stink how am i fearfully or wonderfully made and why approach a gal if you have a good chance of offending her nose?

So perhaps I should say 52 and forever single. By the way for those who understand my last A1C reading was 8.8 way to high but I just don't care about my diet if I eat healthy and still smell. So it may be getting even higher.

God is to good to be unkind so very confuse as I receive His justice and wonder were is the sure mercies of Christ Jesus.

As I grew older and was still single, it bothered me that I might have to start begging women to marry me. Then one day it occurred to me that I didn't have to get married, and it was like the weight of the world was taken off my shoulders. Since then, I've come to realize that I don't WANT to get married.

 

[Sketcher]

If you can't get it treated, perhaps you can find a woman who can't smell or can't smell anymore.

Anosmia - Wikipedia

Sorry I don't have better advice.

 

[HereIStand]

Sorry to hear this. My wife sometimes eats food containing garlic, which can cause her to smell. Is there anything in your diet that might be causing the smell?

 

[Darkhorse]

It's a long shot, but two elements (selenium & tellurium) can cause people to smell bad if they're ingested. They are often found in wells and water in arid or desert areas. They're both somewhat toxic also, so they may cause other symptoms.

A good doctor should have tested for these, but...sometimes things get overlooked.

 

[mukk_in]

So being 52 and single is hard enough; but when you have a good idea why, it not only makes it suck but I've learn to hate myself and question how am i fearfully and wonderfully made?

So April 2017 finally after years of seeing my doctor who never notice this problem but thought my diabetes might be causing the problem that is when he 1st discover I was Type 2 diabetic but still after keeping my blood sugar in check it reared it ugly head time after time. That along with my high blood pressure he sent me to a specialist for this problem so I thought praise God maybe something can be done.

So I see the Specialist but 1st see her assistant says she notice nothing. So the Specialist walks in and I tell her how I have had people say to my face very rudely I STINK immediately after showering. She tells me she notices a smell, I think to myself thank God finally going to get somewhere with this. But she can't describe it. After geting tested and after so many bills I can't afford it.

So at work this morning pretty sure my boss made a statement referring to me smelling; after I showered.

The mental anguish this problem is causing me is limitless. If even after I shower I stink how am i fearfully or wonderfully made and why approach a gal if you have a good chance of offending her nose?

So perhaps I should say 52 and forever single. By the way for those who understand my last A1C reading was 8.8 way to high but I just don't care about my diet if I eat healthy and still smell. So it may be getting even higher.

God is to good to be unkind so very confuse as I receive His justice and wonder were is the sure mercies of Christ Jesus.

Not being facetious (actually I'm serious), but you're in a very good situation (at least according to Paul and the Lord Jesus). If it's God's will, you'll find a mate in His time. Remember that Abraham had a son when he was quite old. Age, numbers and distance are irrelevant to the Lord. Peace in Christ .

 

[Greg J.]

So being 52 and single is hard enough; but when you have a good idea why, it not only makes it suck but I've learn to hate myself and question how am i fearfully and wonderfully made?

So April 2017 finally after years of seeing my doctor who never notice this problem but thought my diabetes might be causing the problem that is when he 1st discover I was Type 2 diabetic but still after keeping my blood sugar in check it reared it ugly head time after time. That along with my high blood pressure he sent me to a specialist for this problem so I thought praise God maybe something can be done.

So I see the Specialist but 1st see her assistant says she notice nothing. So the Specialist walks in and I tell her how I have had people say to my face very rudely I STINK immediately after showering. She tells me she notices a smell, I think to myself thank God finally going to get somewhere with this. But she can't describe it. After geting tested and after so many bills I can't afford it.

So at work this morning pretty sure my boss made a statement referring to me smelling; after I showered.

The mental anguish this problem is causing me is limitless. If even after I shower I stink how am i fearfully or wonderfully made and why approach a gal if you have a good chance of offending her nose?

So perhaps I should say 52 and forever single. By the way for those who understand my last A1C reading was 8.8 way to high but I just don't care about my diet if I eat healthy and still smell. So it may be getting even higher.

God is to good to be unkind so very confuse as I receive His justice and wonder were is the sure mercies of Christ Jesus.

I am thoroughly familiar with this torment, although what has kept me from building relationships with women hasn't been my odor, but the long-term effects of Social Anxiety Disorder (which have been legion). I will be 55 y.o. this year. From my point of view, your best hope is being fully devoted to the Lord with your thoughts, time, words, and actions. It is the power of the Lord Jesus Christ that can resolve whatever issues you face. After so long without feeling loved, accepted, and affirmed (and from the sound of your post), I presume you also have damage to your personality, which probably has as much to do with your isolation as any physical condition. It also sounds like you would benefit from therapy with a psychologist (which I have experienced the benefit of).

So being 52 and single is hard enough; but when you have a good idea why, it not only makes it suck but I've learn to hate myself ...

If you can't stand yourself, that is a marriage relationship killer. If you can't live with yourself, you almost certainly aren't ready to marry. Seek the Lord to love yourself as you are. Ask him to show you how he sees you. Persist in your request, then do what he says (or has already said). Obedience brings the power of God into your life for your long-term benefit—such as making you more into his likeness: loving, kind, generous, etc., which are all very appealing to another Godly person.

 

[JES1023]

Just buy some perfume or deodorant.

About 10 years ago headed to a Messianic Jewish meeting after putting Cologne on, I happened to notice that I smelled like bug repellant after putting it on; I thought since I don't notice this smell that some others do maybe it is just me. No I overheard a lady talking to others as she moved away from me stating I smell and this is one time I must admit it was very true.

I started getting back to church as a New Years Resolution, but after remembering what happened down to me while I live in Kansas, that will me make me fail now. I remember about 15 years ago, going to a Brethren Church in Abilene Kansas, and often overhearing the Pastor's wife state I smell, this was something I didn't notice; but boy did it help push me away from Church.

 

[JES1023]

As I grew older and was still single, it bothered me that I might have to start begging women to marry me. Then one day it occurred to me that I didn't have to get married, and it was like the weight of the world was taken off my shoulders. Since then, I've come to realize that I don't WANT to get married.

If I had better control over my sexual urge I would agree, but as I don't maybe not.

Not being facetious (actually I'm serious), but you're in a very good situation (at least according to Paul and the Lord Jesus). If it's God's will, you'll find a mate in His time. Remember that Abraham had a son when he was quite old. Age, numbers and distance are irrelevant to the Lord. Peace in Christ .

Accept Paul stated better to marry than burn.

I am thoroughly familiar with this torment, although what has kept me from building relationships with women hasn't been my odor, but the long-term effects of Social Anxiety Disorder (which have been legion). I will be 55 y.o. this year. From my point of view, your best hope is being fully devoted to the Lord with your thoughts, time, words, and actions. It is the power of the Lord Jesus Christ that can resolve whatever issues you face. After so long without feeling loved, accepted, and affirmed (and from the sound of your post), I presume you also have damage to your personality, which probably has as much to do with your isolation as any physical condition. It also sounds like you would benefit from therapy with a psychologist (which I have experienced the benefit of).

If you can't stand yourself, that is a marriage relationship killer. If you can't live with yourself, you almost certainly aren't ready to marry. Seek the Lord to love yourself as you are. Ask him to show you how he sees you. Persist in your request, then do what he says (or has already said). Obedience brings the power of God into your life for your long-term benefit—such as making you more into his likeness: loving, kind, generous, etc., which are all very appealing to another Godly person.

Good Advice, but my pray life is just about null and void as I see God the Father (not as a my Father) but as my Judge and His justice is just way to great for me. Where is the tender mercies of Jesus?

II Corinthians 2:15-16
15) For we are unto God a sweet savour of Christ, in them that are saved, and in them that perish:
16) To the one we are the savour of death unto death; and to the other the savour of life unto life. And who is sufficient for these things?
Maybe this is the one Bible promise, God will grant me, but to answer the question, not me.

 

[Darkhorse]

Each person's body chemistry has a profound effect on how a particular fragrance or other substance smells on them. Usually the effects are minor, but sometimes it's dramatic.

I once bought my wife a small spray bottle of a popular perfume, and she tried it on later. It smelled totally different on her than it did in the bottle, and it wasn't pleasant.
After that, I took her with me to try them on, until we found one that worked well.

Our society seems to have a judgmental Puritanical standard about how people smell. It's not considered polite to openly notice how others smell, and certainly not polite to say anything about it. When a person has "chemistry challenges", this sets the stage for hurt feelings down the line. I'm sorry that you have gotten "bad vibes" from Christians, but as a society, we have backed ourselves into a corner here.

Maybe a close friend or two could be your "smell monitor" and alert you if something is amiss?

 

[aiki]

The mental anguish this problem is causing me is limitless. If even after I shower I stink how am i fearfully or wonderfully made and why approach a gal if you have a good chance of offending her nose?

Do you think the first humans suffered from diabetes and bad b.o.? I don't. I think the way God made us to be at the first was pretty awesome. Adam and Eve had none of the effects of sin upon them when they were in Eden with God. No genetic mutations, no inherited diseases, no toxins built up in their bodies, no destructive viruses or germs. Many millenia later, however, after Sin has had its death-bringing effect upon the world and you and I, we are no longer the physical specimens of health that Adam and Eve were. We have all sorts of inherited diseases, and damaging genetic mutations, and various toxins corrupting our health. This effect of Sin - not the design of God - is showing up in your case in issues with diabetes and an incorrigible body odor. In my case, it was horrible acne. Great, big, purple boils all over my face and back. Ouch. And gross. Like you, I blamed God for a time for being afflicted with such awful blemishes, but He helped me see how wrong I was in this and how destructive to walking well with Him my blaming Him was. There is no way to properly walk with God when our trust in Him has been eroded by our thinking He has done us a bad turn in some regard (and may do so again).

It's really impossible to pinpoint what the cause of your problem might be. Are you very obese? Sometimes, this can complicate staying clean and odor free. There are places that can't be reached with soap when a person gets too large; deep folds of skin become breeding grounds for nasty bacteria that can cause bad odors, rashes, etc. Are you eating a balanced diet? Vitamin and mineral deficiencies can play havoc with all sorts of things in the body. Are your kidneys doing their job? When they aren't working right, a persistent odor can be a sign.

God knows exactly what the problem is. And He knows just how to solve it. Ask Him to show you what the answer is. Trust Him. Make sure, though, that you don't have sin in the way, blocking up the lines of communication between you and God.

Isaiah 59:2
2 But your iniquities have separated you from your God; And your sins have hidden His face from you, So that He will not hear.

Keep short accounts with God so that there is nothing hindering His communications to you.

1 John 1:9
9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

So perhaps I should say 52 and forever single.

Maybe. Is God not enough? How could the Almighty Creator of Everything not be? If you have God, what better thing, really, could you possibly possess? It was my experience that when I came to the place where I could say truthfully that God was all I needed, that I was satisfied just with Him, it was then that I encountered my wife. I didn't marry 'til I was 39.

 

[Greg J.]

...
Good Advice, but my pray life is just about null and void as I see God the Father (not as a my Father) but as my Judge and His justice is just way to great for me. Where is the tender mercies of Jesus?

In your relationship with God, if you see him as your judge, how can you expect to be treated any other way? No matter what he does, a part of you will see him as your judge. Presumably (like everyone else), you have take issue with God if you do not get your way. But should you get your way or trust that God loves you and knows what is good for you for the next thousand years better than you do—and instead make your focus trying to know God better, trust that he knows what he is doing, and perhaps seek to understand what good God may bring out of your situation? The more your situation is costing you, the greater your reward will be for staying true to God through it.

God may be using your struggle so you have opportunity to love him more for the right reasons. Without such opportunities we cannot fight to choose God. But God IS loving, merciful, gracious, kind, and generous. When he has finishing working on you through this, nothing in all creation will stop him from freeing you from your troubles.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. (Romans 8:28-29, 1984 NIV)

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33, 1984 NIV)

As you deepen your relationship with Christ, you experience more of the benefit of being unified with him (born again in Christ), and you will also "overcome the world" more and more—which means your suffering and struggles decrease (eventually), and sometimes, in the case of spiritual, mental, or physical malady, are healed. But being healed doesn't matter to a person who is no longer troubled by their situation because they are so close to the Lord and have come to see that he is doing or allowing it for a very, very good reason. Ask God to show you some of the value of your problems and trust that he is working in many ways for your blessing, but that you can't see them clearly yet, because you do not yet know the Lord well enough.

My purpose is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge. (Colossians 2:2-3, 1984 NIV)

 

[Kit Sigmon]

I seem to recall a lady on here who mentioned about having body odor
even after showering...the user name she went by was Angeleyes I think?
perhaps you have some form of TMAU like her?

Here's a link for you to check out: Trimethylaminuria - Organizations: Are there good support groups for trimethylaminuria? | ThinkGenetic

 

[God bless Joshua]

meeting after putting Cologne on, I happened to notice that I smelled like bug repellant

Cologne can not kill bacteria which cause bad smell, you need deodorant
eat more vegetable and less meat/cheese/milk/egg

 

[JES1023]

I remember back in 2003, working at a Target store in Kansas, having a new employee start working with me, I told I didn't like a certain gal, because she often told others how I stank as I could overhear her. He told me no I didn't and didn't believe that she would say such a thing. He talked to her about it, and came back and told me what I already knew that yes she did tell everyone I stank. A few week later I overheard him telling her yea I stank.

Each person's body chemistry has a profound effect on how a particular fragrance or other substance smells on them. Usually the effects are minor, but sometimes it's dramatic.

I once bought my wife a small spray bottle of a popular perfume, and she tried it on later. It smelled totally different on her than it did in the bottle, and it wasn't pleasant.
After that, I took her with me to try them on, until we found one that worked well.

Our society seems to have a judgmental Puritanical standard about how people smell. It's not considered polite to openly notice how others smell, and certainly not polite to say anything about it. When a person has "chemistry challenges", this sets the stage for hurt feelings down the line. I'm sorry that you have gotten "bad vibes" from Christians, but as a society, we have backed ourselves into a corner here.

Maybe a close friend or two could be your "smell monitor" and alert you if something is amiss?

Family and friends all thought it was in my head even after talking to doctors who agreed with them that I didn't stink (those are the kindest words to me). But one doctor I saw who I know was telling me the truth and didn't think that I stank I remember once overhearing him, telling another patient I didn't stink. This doctor was always honest even told a friend's daughter you stink something is not right this get it fixed.

Till I saw the Specialist, no doctors thought I stank nor have I notice anything. But the Specialist told me she notice something but just didn't know now to describe it, i'm probably maddest at her, your a Specialist and can't describe the smell. Family and friends finally realize my anguish wasn't just in my head when she wrote as a diagnosis abnormal body odor.

So except for this Specialist and thought I have overheard plus the few that have confronted me to my face I have noticed no odor; just people noticing something even after showering and yes applying deodorant.

Do you think the first humans suffered from diabetes and bad b.o.? I don't. I think the way God made us to be at the first was pretty awesome. Adam and Eve had none of the effects of sin upon them when they were in Eden with God. No genetic mutations, no inherited diseases, no toxins built up in their bodies, no destructive viruses or germs. Many millenia later, however, after Sin has had its death-bringing effect upon the world and you and I, we are no longer the physical specimens of health that Adam and Eve were. We have all sorts of inherited diseases, and damaging genetic mutations, and various toxins corrupting our health. This effect of Sin - not the design of God - is showing up in your case in issues with diabetes and an incorrigible body odor. In my case, it was horrible acne. Great, big, purple boils all over my face and back. Ouch. And gross. Like you, I blamed God for a time for being afflicted with such awful blemishes, but He helped me see how wrong I was in this and how destructive to walking well with Him my blaming Him was. There is no way to properly walk with God when our trust in Him has been eroded by our thinking He has done us a bad turn in some regard (and may do so again).

It's really impossible to pinpoint what the cause of your problem might be. Are you very obese? Sometimes, this can complicate staying clean and odor free. There are places that can't be reached with soap when a person gets too large; deep folds of skin become breeding grounds for nasty bacteria that can cause bad odors, rashes, etc. Are you eating a balanced diet? Vitamin and mineral deficiencies can play havoc with all sorts of things in the body. Are your kidneys doing their job? When they aren't working right, a persistent odor can be a sign.

God knows exactly what the problem is. And He knows just how to solve it. Ask Him to show you what the answer is. Trust Him. Make sure, though, that you don't have sin in the way, blocking up the lines of communication between you and God.

Isaiah 59:2
2 But your iniquities have separated you from your God; And your sins have hidden His face from you, So that He will not hear.

Keep short accounts with God so that there is nothing hindering His communications to you.

1 John 1:9
9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.



Maybe. Is God not enough? How could the Almighty Creator of Everything not be? If you have God, what better thing, really, could you possibly possess? It was my experience that when I came to the place where I could say truthfully that God was all I needed, that I was satisfied just with Him, it was then that I encountered my wife. I didn't marry 'til I was 39.

Appreciate this and yes God should be more than enough, but some of the most beautiful women I have ever meet have bad cases of acne. I know this doesn't ease your pain in the pass or theirs either, but it is something I just notice.

I have had small bouts with acne also but never that bad. Although my sister has suffered badly from it. But as a teenagers getting over chicken pots I remember 2 girls coming up to me, and barking at me because of all the soars on my face didn't think must of it because I realize I did look bad and at least I was ugly at the time because I was still healing, where as there ugliness might be permanent.

For in the passage from II Corinthians 2:15-16, Paul asked who is sufficient for such a thing? Tells me few people think that this is a good thing and even fewer are sufficient for such a thing and yes i'm one of the many, not the few and fewer.

The only good thing that has come out of this is that if I notice someone else scent I keep it to myself. If someone ask me about someone else odor I tell them I don't know since I do my best to stay clean and for some reason it never seems to be enough. But when God has allowed this hurt in my life it is a difficult block for me to get over. All I can think of is God is so good and i'm so evil more than most if not all others to have this done to me.

 

[Darkhorse]

I seem to recall a lady on here who mentioned about having body odor
even after showering...the user name she went by was Angeleyes I think?
perhaps you have some form of TMAU like her?

Here's a link for you to check out: Trimethylaminuria - Organizations: Are there good support groups for trimethylaminuria? | ThinkGenetic

This looks like an excellent resource - I would pursue it.

 

[JES1023]

Since the Specialist I saw wasn't much help, she did state she didn't think I had TMAU; but did tell me whatever the problem was it should have been address in my childhood.

I happen to stress way to much, but this has been a development during my adult years. The only thought I have is that I have chronic sinus problems which stem back all the way to my childhood; but since I have always seem to be suffering from this, I don't know what I can do.

 

[Kit Sigmon]

Since the Specialist I saw wasn't much help, she did state she didn't think I had TMAU; but did tell me whatever the problem was it should have been address in my childhood.

I happen to stress way to much, but this has been a development during my adult years. The only thought I have is that I have chronic sinus problems which stem back all the way to my childhood; but since I have always seem to be suffering from this, I don't know what I can do.

What tests did she have done to confirm that?
not all those with some form of TMAU smell like fish.
And the smell/odor can be noticeable at times or not noticeable...depending upon individuals, their stress levels, diet etc.

Watching what you eat can help...there be foods and spices that do cause some
people to smell. A friend of ours loves spicy foods but after he eats it he reeks
of it for the rest of the day...it oozes through his pores, he showers puts on cologne...none of that helps, it has to go away on its own.
I know some meds can cause you to smell different...I note you mentioned being
diabetic.

 

[NothingIsImpossible]

I was going to mention something but others did already about TMAU. Like many diseases, sometimes the rarer ones are harder to diagnose. Especially because the doctors may not even have thought about something so rare. For some people they go decades before getting answers.

I pray you find the answers you need to get it fixed. Because you seem like a wonderful person!

This is meant as a encouragement so hopefully it doesn't come off the wrong way. My wife is from another country and now that she is in america shes loves frying fish. The one fish she makes is known as "stinky fish" by many because its utterly horrific. So when she cooks it, the house may smell for a day or two. Not counting when she reheats it. And the clothes we wear for that day we have to throw in the wash. For months I got mad if she even asked about frying it. It felt like a nightmare.

My point? After being married almost 5 years now, I have gotten almost oblivious to the smell now. Its just something you get used too. So have hope that until it gets fixed, know someone who really loves you won't mind any smell and may even get used to it! God forbid of course the docs can't fix it for you. Hopefully thats encouraging.

Also I pray God would just heal you of it and I pray that people would think before they speak to you about it and have heart and think to themselves if maybe its not something you can control.