- Apr 21, 2020
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Recently I contributed to a thread where the author was struggling with Christianity’s supposed sexist verses, material in the Bible which (at a glance) can be disappointing to modern sensibilities.
If you check out my recent message history you can get in there yourself and give this lady some support against what you might think is a failed interpretation of the Bible. I’m sure she’d appreciate that.
Either way, this lady shared a blog that posed many provocative (and to her upsetting) questions about the Bible and gender. Being the inquisitive chap that I am it wasn’t long before I started reading the blog myself to see how right or wrong the author was.
It wasn’t long before I came across Monica’s husbands 10 rules. Rules for how to have a happy (spicy
) life with your other half.
I agree with some of these points, while I disagree with others (#7 for example, if you are being eye cucked by every man in a twelve block radius, she’s no longer “your prize” or “your wife.” She’s everybody’s wife!)
At some points I suspected that Monica was secretly a man (MANica!) And that the list was their frustrated way of telling women everywhere what men truly want out of a marriage. Whatever the case it’s an interesting piece of work.
Whatever my views, I thought it would be really cool to get everyone else’s opinion on each of the points on this list. Do you love Monica’s husbands 10 rules or do you hate them? All opinions welcome!
___________________
Hello Sir! I’m so glad that I found your site! It’s hard to find a Christian blog that is honest about sexuality and marriage. I wish that you had been around when I got engaged. I got married when I was only nineteen and had a lot to learn, it would have been really helpful to already have thought about all the things you teach. You actually got me thinking about the advice I wish I had gotten, and the things that I would have told my younger self and that I would tell young Christian girls who are going to enter into a faith based marriage these days. I hope you don’t mind me sharing what I came up with. I was lucky because my husband gave me strict rules to follow which helped me a lot. They are basically what I have written down here. Following his rules has led to a healthy sexual relationship and marriage.
1. Obedience means complete obedience. No exceptions. If you can pick and choose when to obey you aren’t actually being obedient. Sex is an important part of marriage and being totally sexually obedient to your husband is part of your vows. Respect your husband’s authority over you in every aspect of your life, as God intended. (Ephesians 5:22-24)
2. Your main pleasure from sex comes from you pleasing your husband. Sometimes sex will be physically pleasureful for you and sometimes it won’t be physically pleasureful for you, but either way if you satisfy your husband then you will be fulfilled knowing that you have pleased your man. ( Romans 1:27, Proverbs 5:18-19, Song of Solomon 4:16)
3. Your husband carries great responsibility as the head of your household. It is very stressful to be your family’s leader, provider and protector, and sex is an important way to relieve that stress. Sometimes your husband is going to demand sex at an inconvenient time, or when you are tired. Remember that he probably needs a physical release to help him get through a hard day. (Romans 1:27, Proverbs 5:18-19, Song of Solomon 4:16)
4. A man wants an enthusiastic sexual partner. Sometimes you are going to feel that what your husband demands of you is degrading or humiliating. Your obligation is to submit to him, so always have a smile on your face and an eager to please attitude when your husband demands your sexual service, no matter what it is. (Romans 1:27, Proverbs 5:18-19, Song of Solomon 4:16)
5. Every man has his own personal sexual needs and desires and your responsibility is to meet those needs the way you husband chooses. He is going to train you to please him the way he wants and you need to work your hardest to learn what he likes and to always be attentive to his particular needs and preferences. (Jeremiah 18:6)
6. Men are visual creatures and you need to keep your body in shape and always look your best. Work out and eat right to keep slim and sexy. Pay attention to your hair and makeup even if you are just at home. Embrace body modifications if your husband thinks they will enhance your beauty. (Psalm 45:11)
7. Dress the way that your husband instructs. Men like to show off their wives. You are your husband’s prize. Wearing revealing clothes does not make you a [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]. You can be a faithful Christian wife and also look like a sexy, desirable woman when your husband takes you out to dinner or out on the town or to the beach. It might take you some time to feel comfortable with some outfits but you will be happy when you sense your husband’s pride when he shows you to the world and lets people know you belong to him. (Psalm 45:11-15)
8. The Bible is very clear that your husband is your master and that God expects you to always respect his absolute authority over you, and to serve and obey him in every way. As my husband has told me many times, I can do things the hard way or the easy way, but either way I am going to do them. So take the easy way by submitting to him with a smile on your face! (1 Peter 3:5-6)
9. Sometimes your husband will need to punish you when you fall short of his expectations. Be grateful that he takes the time to correct your behavior and thank him for helping to make you a better Christian wife. (Revelation 3:19)
10. A sexually satisfied husband makes for a happy home and marriage, and the key to a sexually satisfied husband is a wife who thinks of his sexual pleasure and embraces her submission to him. Be your husband’s sexual pet, always cheerful and humbly grateful for being the woman that he has chosen to please him. (Proverbs 12:4, Proverbs 31:12, Romans 1:27, Proverbs 5:18-19, Song of Solomon 4:16)
I can say that at least for me these rules have worked well and our marriage is very strong. It was not all easy for me at first but once I embraced these principles and adopted the proper mindset I felt right, and I still feel that way years later. Cheers! Monica.
____________
PS if this post breaks lots of rules, I’d like the topic to be buried at sea, in a tastefully closed casket, with a modestly large gathering.
If you check out my recent message history you can get in there yourself and give this lady some support against what you might think is a failed interpretation of the Bible. I’m sure she’d appreciate that.
Either way, this lady shared a blog that posed many provocative (and to her upsetting) questions about the Bible and gender. Being the inquisitive chap that I am it wasn’t long before I started reading the blog myself to see how right or wrong the author was.
It wasn’t long before I came across Monica’s husbands 10 rules. Rules for how to have a happy (spicy
) life with your other half.I agree with some of these points, while I disagree with others (#7 for example, if you are being eye cucked by every man in a twelve block radius, she’s no longer “your prize” or “your wife.” She’s everybody’s wife!)
At some points I suspected that Monica was secretly a man (MANica!) And that the list was their frustrated way of telling women everywhere what men truly want out of a marriage. Whatever the case it’s an interesting piece of work.
Whatever my views, I thought it would be really cool to get everyone else’s opinion on each of the points on this list. Do you love Monica’s husbands 10 rules or do you hate them? All opinions welcome!
___________________
Hello Sir! I’m so glad that I found your site! It’s hard to find a Christian blog that is honest about sexuality and marriage. I wish that you had been around when I got engaged. I got married when I was only nineteen and had a lot to learn, it would have been really helpful to already have thought about all the things you teach. You actually got me thinking about the advice I wish I had gotten, and the things that I would have told my younger self and that I would tell young Christian girls who are going to enter into a faith based marriage these days. I hope you don’t mind me sharing what I came up with. I was lucky because my husband gave me strict rules to follow which helped me a lot. They are basically what I have written down here. Following his rules has led to a healthy sexual relationship and marriage.
1. Obedience means complete obedience. No exceptions. If you can pick and choose when to obey you aren’t actually being obedient. Sex is an important part of marriage and being totally sexually obedient to your husband is part of your vows. Respect your husband’s authority over you in every aspect of your life, as God intended. (Ephesians 5:22-24)
2. Your main pleasure from sex comes from you pleasing your husband. Sometimes sex will be physically pleasureful for you and sometimes it won’t be physically pleasureful for you, but either way if you satisfy your husband then you will be fulfilled knowing that you have pleased your man. ( Romans 1:27, Proverbs 5:18-19, Song of Solomon 4:16)
3. Your husband carries great responsibility as the head of your household. It is very stressful to be your family’s leader, provider and protector, and sex is an important way to relieve that stress. Sometimes your husband is going to demand sex at an inconvenient time, or when you are tired. Remember that he probably needs a physical release to help him get through a hard day. (Romans 1:27, Proverbs 5:18-19, Song of Solomon 4:16)
4. A man wants an enthusiastic sexual partner. Sometimes you are going to feel that what your husband demands of you is degrading or humiliating. Your obligation is to submit to him, so always have a smile on your face and an eager to please attitude when your husband demands your sexual service, no matter what it is. (Romans 1:27, Proverbs 5:18-19, Song of Solomon 4:16)
5. Every man has his own personal sexual needs and desires and your responsibility is to meet those needs the way you husband chooses. He is going to train you to please him the way he wants and you need to work your hardest to learn what he likes and to always be attentive to his particular needs and preferences. (Jeremiah 18:6)
6. Men are visual creatures and you need to keep your body in shape and always look your best. Work out and eat right to keep slim and sexy. Pay attention to your hair and makeup even if you are just at home. Embrace body modifications if your husband thinks they will enhance your beauty. (Psalm 45:11)
7. Dress the way that your husband instructs. Men like to show off their wives. You are your husband’s prize. Wearing revealing clothes does not make you a [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]. You can be a faithful Christian wife and also look like a sexy, desirable woman when your husband takes you out to dinner or out on the town or to the beach. It might take you some time to feel comfortable with some outfits but you will be happy when you sense your husband’s pride when he shows you to the world and lets people know you belong to him. (Psalm 45:11-15)
8. The Bible is very clear that your husband is your master and that God expects you to always respect his absolute authority over you, and to serve and obey him in every way. As my husband has told me many times, I can do things the hard way or the easy way, but either way I am going to do them. So take the easy way by submitting to him with a smile on your face! (1 Peter 3:5-6)
9. Sometimes your husband will need to punish you when you fall short of his expectations. Be grateful that he takes the time to correct your behavior and thank him for helping to make you a better Christian wife. (Revelation 3:19)
10. A sexually satisfied husband makes for a happy home and marriage, and the key to a sexually satisfied husband is a wife who thinks of his sexual pleasure and embraces her submission to him. Be your husband’s sexual pet, always cheerful and humbly grateful for being the woman that he has chosen to please him. (Proverbs 12:4, Proverbs 31:12, Romans 1:27, Proverbs 5:18-19, Song of Solomon 4:16)
I can say that at least for me these rules have worked well and our marriage is very strong. It was not all easy for me at first but once I embraced these principles and adopted the proper mindset I felt right, and I still feel that way years later. Cheers! Monica.
____________
PS if this post breaks lots of rules, I’d like the topic to be buried at sea
, in a tastefully closed casket, with a modestly large gathering. 
