Mark 3:28-30 Question

Hi, I'm new here and I did search on this and I didn't find anything. Sorry if it's been done before or if I'm posting in the wrong place. I haven't been saved yet or baptized, so I'm not technically a New Christian, but I'm definitely planning on getting it done and finding a church and all.

My question is about the verse that's the title of this post. In my Bible, it doesn't state 'blasphemy' like the things that I read online, but it uses another word; curses. I was in a situation where I lost my dog and I was extremely mad and said some things that I shouldn't have said out of lack of control from my anger. So because of the way it's stated in my Bible, it sounds like if you do anything like that, then you're doomed to Hell for eternity. I searched it online and it elaborated and made me worry less, but I'm still not sure.

It said something along the lines that the only way it's unpardonable is because the person who blasphemed had no intention on ever having any interest in being saved or going to Heaven or having faith in Christ and that if you worried that you committed this sin, then you haven't. It also said that if the unbeliever wants to be forgiven, then he'll be forgiven of it.

I just find it really confusing and want to get opinions on whether or not I'm doomed for Hell because of a mistake I made when I was really mad.

Thanks, you guys! I didn't really want to post that because I was afraid the answer was going to be, "NO, you're never going to Heaven!" so it was done out of impulse.

I intend on finding a church within the next month or so if everything works out and I'm really wanting to learn how to know Jesus the way they say you should because I haven't been to a church since I was probably 5 or so and don't know exactly what they mean by that. I plan to learn, though.

Thanks for helping me out and I'll go find the verse you were talking about, Heinrich.

Believe me, I have *tons* of questions, but I won't bore you with them, haha. My biggest fear since about the age of 8 was going to Hell and I'm trying to clear everything up and make sure that I'm okay and haven't done anything too bad to have made God turn His back on me.

I will say, though, that I've been told a million times by my dad that a church isn't going to save me. I do know that, but I honestly would love to find one and meet new people and have people around me to make sure that I don't stray. I've always been seriously yearning to get in a church because I haven't been to one in years. I need to turn my life around and that's the first thing I can think of doing. Other than being saved, of course.

About being saved, I always heard you have to confess by mouth, but I'm so shy that I worry it means to do it in front of tons of people. Is that what they mean when they say to confess with your mouth or can you be alone doing it? Of course, I'd rather do it in front of people so I know that I'm doing it 'right'. And does that mean confessing every single sin, or does just saying, "Forgive me for my sins," will forgive them all?

Sorry about the questions. I hope they don't sound ignorant because I don't know the answers. It's half the reason I want to find a church, so I can ask up front if I ever get curious about anything.

Thanks, Malaka. That cleared everything up. I appreciate you answering my questions.