The bible never said what God did before he created us, after all.
Our Father and Jesus were sharing with one another in God's own glory > John 17:5 >
"'And now, O Father, glorify Me together with Yourself, with the glory which I had with You before the world was.'" (John 17:5)
So, one thing They were doing was sharing with one another in glory. And our Apostle Paul says >
"For whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren." (Romans 8:29)
My opinion is this predestining was done before creation. So, if this is correct, then this is something God did before He created us. And all things are in His control, with the priority of having children who are like Jesus.
a horrible illustration of God being some insecure deity in where any good is absolutely meaningless because it's all about soothing his vanity.
Well, some or many might think it would be vain for God to want many children who are like His Son. But Jesus is the most pleasing to God, more than any created being or thing. And Jesus is real and genuine in love, more than all other beings.
So, it is good, how God desires to change us to be like Jesus, and to have us sharing as His family. This is not conceited, how God is pleased to share His own Self and Son and love with us, and make us like Jesus so we are pleasing like Jesus, to God, and we can benefit from being with God like Jesus His Son does.
And Jesus has claimed this in prayer >
"'And the glory which You gave Me I have given them, that they may be one just as We are one: I in them, and You in Me; that they may be made perfect in one, and that the world may know that You have sent Me, and have loved them as You have loved Me.'" (John 17:22-23)
So, Jesus is not conceited and vain, if He desires to have our Father love us as He loves His own Son Jesus.
So, this is what God is about; so because humans are not first attentive to this, their actions and lives are not fitting with God's priorities; and so their lives and actions do not work out > their vanity is the problem, then, and ones who are wrong can see God as being wrong. But they need to speak for themselves, and become humble with Jesus so we can share as His family >
"with all lowliness and gentleness, with longsuffering, bearing with one another in love," (Ephesians 4:2)
"And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful." (Colossians 3:15)