Divorced and waiting for a new beginning

I'm a divorced single mom and I got divorced due to biblical reasons of my ex bringing infidelity into our marriage. I have been divorced for about 6 years now and I started off jumping into dating (mostly online) and that failed me miserably. I have many regrets and pray a lot for God to send me a Christ following spouse. I know that God is still working on me and I've learned so much especially once I started abstaining from sex which has been for almost a year now. Though I believe that God can give me a new start and send the strong Christian man I desire that will guide my children and I and love us with Christ's love it is still a struggle for me to do it all on my own (just the on my own part, because God has blessed me with a nice home in a safe neighborhood, 2 great jobs in ministry, and everything I need and more but it can be lonely at times!) especially when I'm surrounded by other couples and it seems that only non-Christian men pursue me (which I now run from). Has anyone been in a similar situation as mine that has encouragement for me? Also I'm keeping faith that God will send that man for me when the time is right, please keep me in prayer for this. Please stay positive on this thread with love to all who respond. Thank you, and God bless.

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) said:

for what it's worth..i remember a poster that used to frequent here that had a similar story. she ended up finding her one on CF and as far as i know are living happily ever after. so there's definitely hope. lol

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That's awesome! lol Thank you for sharing. How did you find out she's doing well? Haha.

That's great to hear!

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) said:

it's been a while. and for one thing, i haven't seen her back on here. so im assuming life has gone on with her and the family.

edit: just did a quick search on her username and her last activity was in 2018. her status still showed married, however.

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Cool, wish I could have read that post!

THE W said:

that would be the million$ question..

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If she was divorced for the cause of him committing adultery then yes it was okay according to the Bible.

THE W said:

Jesus saying that a husband who divorces his wife, outside of sexual immorality, and marries another commits adultery is assumed to also apply to the wife in a reverse situation.

the unambiguous command also from our Lord that anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery would bring that assumption into question.

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I think people think too hard about the verses, It's as simple as is reads:

In the King James Version of the Bible the text reads: But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.
Matthew 5:32

If you are divorced because of adultery it is OK to remarry, I take it as saying if divorced for other reasons other than fornication that the divorced person and their new spouse would be committing adultery. I have been counseled by pastors who have explained it this way to me and I agree with them.

Something else that I think we need to keep in mind is that God is not here to condemn forever those who have been wronged. He is a loving and understanding God and he is a God of second chances.

I'm also a firm believer however that we should take all things in prayer to the Lord and let him provide and when he sends someone he has a way of putting that persons mind at ease about that decision because all gifts from God will come with peace and clarity. I'm not concerned about this as I once was, because I feel I have a better understanding of those verses now. I stayed in an awful marriage separated on and off for 6 years being cheated on because of other people's take on this passage and them pushing that view on me. And it's not right. Everyone has a different view of what the bible means by those verses and what better way for a believer to make sense of it than take it to God and let him answer it for you.

ThisIsMe123 said:

The thing is...what it okay for her to re-marry? Considering what's been said about remarriage in these here forums?

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I think people think too hard about the verses, It's as simple as is reads:

In the King James Version of the Bible the text reads: But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.
Matthew 5:32

If you are divorced because of adultery it is OK to remarry, I take it as saying if divorced for other reasons other than fornication that the divorced person and their new spouse would be committing adultery. I have been counseled by pastors who have explained it this way to me and I agree with them.

Something else that I think we need to keep in mind is that God is not here to condemn forever those who have been wronged. He is a loving and understanding God and he is a God of second chances.

I'm also a firm believer however that we should take all things in prayer to the Lord and let him provide and when he sends someone he has a way of putting that persons mind at ease about that decision because all gifts from God will come with peace and clarity. I'm not concerned about this as I once was, because I feel I have a better understanding of those verses now. I stayed in an awful marriage separated on and off for 6 years being cheated on because of other people's take on this passage and them pushing that view on me. And it's not right. Everyone has a different view of what the bible means by those verses and what better way for a believer to make sense of it than take it to God and let him answer it for you.

THE W said:

You say that, yet your conclusion is based on an assumption of the text rather than what's actually there.

I get it though, there's a lot riding your interpretation for those divorced people wanting a second chance.

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My conclusion is comprehensive of not only that verse but also of other life verses of mine from the bible that point all fingers back to Christ and what he wants for our lives in terms of his promises.
I'm not sure if your last sentence is tiptoeing around saying that divorced people interpret this how they want, but that would be a false accusation. I live to please the Lord and as I said I stayed in a broken marriage for 6 years seeking God's guidance through prayer and scripture before I even got divorced.
This brings to mind a bible verse:

Matthew 7:2

1“Do not judge, or you will be judged. 2For with the same judgment you pronounce, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

3Why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but fail to notice the beam in your own eye? 4How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ while there is still a beam in your own eye? 5You hypocrite! First take the beam out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.

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