When a young person "comes out."

We have had a few issues of this sort in my social group, and I was wondering, what does one do when an Orthodox Christian teen/young adult announces that they are "gay" ?

Having gone through this myself, I am confused as to how to act. In my experience, there is a great difference between confiding that one struggles with same sex attraction, and announcing to friends and family that one wants to pursue a homosexual lifestyle (the latter occurring, in this case.)

My first thought is to tell people in this situation that we must struggle with this cross toward Christ, and that our sin does not make us who we are. However I know, from personal experience, that this is not what they want to hear. They "gay scene" has become such a poisonous entity, it tells us that homosexuality is a beautiful thing and that we're in a struggle for our rights to love who we want to love. With this mindset, no wonder it's difficult to see the Church's perspective.

I'm perplexed. How would you handle something like this? Balancing the rope of being truthful and not driving the person to an evil community that they see as more "loving" than the Church is very difficult.

ugh, Lord have mercy. I think this is more for your priest to tell you how to respond.

I'm not sure if I can offer much on what to say. You seem to have the right idea; love him as Christ loves him. Share your own struggle, if you are comfortable, understanding that people change, and can betray trust. What specifically is said depends a lot on your relationship with this young man.

Prayer and therapy may help.

You should probably let your parents know how you feel. I just wouldn't know how to approch this type of situation becausr I have not been in it

Love him/her as Christ commanded. I'm sure he/she has struggled with the issues and won't be particularly receptive if you try to point out their faults. Perhaps by showing them Christian Agape and fellowship, and by being an icon of Christ, your witness and model will be enough. More than likely however, as most of us do, they will fall away from the church at some point. It's a fine line to walk.

Greg the byzantine said:

More than likely however, as most of us do, they will fall away from the church at some point. It's a fine line to walk.

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When I went through this, others showed me the love of Christ but I rejected them. As much as i hate to say it, I feel as though time away from Church was good for me because it allowed me to really see how low and deprived the "Gay community" truly is, and showed me how much I cannot live without Church in my life, and especially the Body and Blood of Christ.

Sometimes, it's better to learn the hard way. But I just know that there must be a better way out there than apostasy.

Support them, comfort them, pray for them, and be friends with them always.

Dewi Sant said:

Support them, comfort them, pray for them, and be friends with them always.

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Best answer in this thread.

HalupkiMonster said:

When I went through this, others showed me the love of Christ but I rejected them. As much as i hate to say it, I feel as though time away from Church was good for me because it allowed me to really see how low and deprived the "Gay community" truly is, and showed me how much I cannot live without Church in my life, and especially the Body and Blood of Christ.

Sometimes, it's better to learn the hard way. But I just know that there must be a better way out there than apostasy.

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yep, St Paul brings that up too. sometimes you gotta be in the mire of the pigpen for a spell to realize what you had in the Father's House.

I might tell them the truth, or I might withhold from them the truth until such a time as they can bear it -- the appropriate response being determined by means of the gift of spiritual discernment, and always guided by our love of God and of the other.

If people come out of the closet, I wonder if we could tell them to go back in? No? Ok...just a suggestion!