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Recent content by LaBarre

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    Cousellors

    Grasshopper, I don't know the answer to any of those questions, but they are very valid and standard questions that the counseling office should be happy to help you with. Some potential counselors will even spend a few minutes on the phone with you without having an appointment to answer...
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    Is it healing to share?

    You mentioned that you were seeking counseling....are you wondering if a counselor would be ready to hear you? If you have a professional counselor (one that is trained and licensed), they he/she will be ready. And very willing. They will have experienced how healing it is for their clients to...
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    Is it healing to share?

    Hi dusky_tresses, From my personal experience, it helps to share when you are ready to share. In fact, when the time was right, it was a huge help. In the beginning, the only person I told was someone I trusted very, very well. The relief I felt came from having another human being hear...
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    I am in need of answers...

    Hi Ashley, Okay, from your responses, it sounds like there have been other things going on in your family even before your mom's job (you wrote about the constant fighting and bickering). It also sounds like you blame yourself for causing it. You yourself said that you "failed them". You...
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    so much going on

    It's weird to hear that so many people find that numb place to be scary. I don't. I can go weeks/months without realizing that I've numbed out, and time has passed without me participating in life. I like it. Although, because I am now in my forties, I see that I do miss out on things, and...
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    I am in need of answers...

    I have to go to work this morning Ashley. I'll respond as soon as I can tonight. LaBarre
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    I am in need of answers...

    Ashley, (sorry, I didn't remember your know until I posted this! Names are very important.) First of all, I'd like to say that I'm so sorry this is happening to you, and that you do not deserve this cruel treatment or to live with this kind of fear. And we do care....very very much. I'm glad...
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    Why is it so hard to forgive myself?

    Dear Cindy, What do you have to forgive yourself for? Do you blame yourself for the abuse? If so, then you might have misdirected anger - anger at yourself instead of the abuser. For some funny reason, it's easier for us to do that. I don't know when you will like yourself, or forgive...
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    Can i ask a question ...bit of advice too *poss trigg*

    Okay Katey, I'm sorry that I probably don't have anything to tell you that you want to hear. But I'm going to try anyway. It sounds like you feel helpless. You can't predict what this guy will or won't do, what the police will or won't do, so basically, there's really only one person I would...
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    rough few days, Possible triggers

    Hi The4Rs, You spoke of God losing patience with you, getting tired of hearing you cry, seeing your anger and fear, etc. The four Gospels tell of Jesus the night before He was to be executed, praying in the garden. He was scared. Terrified. He asked God to "pass this cup" if...
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    A Story I Have To Tell

    Gawron, There are so many things I'd like to say to you, but your posts touched me a great deal - in positive ways. There are many things I'd like to say to you, but I'm only going to choose the ones that might be helpful to you. First off, my apologies for not replying sooner. I read your...
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    Just when I thought it was safe to talk about...

    flnativegirl, First, a big congratulations on your current place in life and recovery, and especially for the new baby. Just a couple thoughts here. I've never been married, so take it with a grain of salt. In regards to your feeling unsettled about discovering that recounting the life with...
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    I don't think I can do it...any advice?!

    Dear ChristsDisciple, My view is very different from many other's view. First let me say, that however good her intentions, the preacher's words did more harm than good. To demand that people forgive right then and there at that very moment??? That's shockingly unrealistic. People need time...
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    Is Trust a Bad Word?

    lifewanderer, Wow. Such a simple question; how do you trust? But such a difficult process to understand. I was very much like you - people were dangerous. I had counseling, but didn't specifically work on "how to trust people". Some of that ability, simply came over time as I...
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    emotional disconnection..

    Vigilantsoul, My heart goes out to you. For what it's worth, I think you are making the right decision in disconnecting from your mum. It's obvious that it breaks your heart, but it's also obvious that your mum and your family are making it impossible to have even half of normal relationship...
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