• Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.

A biblical argument against Friendship Evangelism

1Tonne

Well-Known Member
Dec 2, 2021
1,206
724
49
Taranaki
✟137,436.00
Country
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Why not consider Friendship Evangelism like a tool in a toolbelt?
I do consider it a tool in my toolbelt. I just do not think that we should be putting it above proclamation evangelism.
If you can't share the Gospel in an interview, then you are no better.
What type of comment is that? You accused me of being a stirrer before. What are you?

There are times we all miss saying the Gospel. If you have read the thread properly, then you would see that I have fallen short. I even told a story where I could have said the Gospel and didn't. The following day that person died. So, I do not claim to be perfect.
But I do prioritise speaking the Gospel over friendship evangelism. And that is what this thread is about. Not me but how friendship evangelism is like love carefully concealed.

So, please keep off this thread if you only have waste of time things to say that are only attacking the individual.
 
Last edited:
Upvote 0

shadowhunter

+collaboratively study, ~ debate, -fight.
Site Supporter
Apr 19, 2008
256
63
✟84,340.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Being an evangelist, I like the way you think, but I don't think the verse means what you think it means.

11 And he gave some, apostles; and some, prophets; and some, evangelists; and some, pastors and teachers;
12 For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ:

What do apostles do? They go outside the church to plow the ground in new territory. Paul said that though he was an apostle to the Gentiles, he was not an apostle to the Romans. Peter was there.

What do prophets do? The OT prophet spoke of Christ in mystery and riddle so that people could not get saved by teaching alone. They had to wait until after the cross, when the full revelation of the Father was made known through it. The NT prophets unpacked the OT and spoke of the cross after the fact validating Christ. Their work is not inside the local church, but spans across the church.

Evangelists go outside to the highways and byways and 'compel' people to come to the marriage supper.

Pastors administrate the flock.

Teachers, under the pastors, teach what the prophets have revealed about the cross.

The three and three are in a Greek parenthesis. So v. 12 may ionly apply to the second three.
"and some, pastors and teachers for the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ:"

As we go we are to 'teach them to obey'? eh.. It also says 'teach them to preserve what has been entrusted to you'; That is: the new teaching of peace, the gospel which was hidden from the beginning and now is made known through the cross and NT prophets.

That's my understanding. But what do I know? I have been a bi-vocational evangelist for 40 years, and yes I share the gospel in job interviews. Probably not the way you do. The way that is taught in evangelism classes is problematic on a number of fronts.Especially when the gospel is treated like a mantra and people are brow beaten into some kind of mental assent.

It also may apply as A,B,C: a,b,c for the 1,2,3.

Whichever way it was intended, it was certainly not intended to cause useless contentions. You can't make a person fly by telling them they should fly. You show them that you can, encourage them that they can, and teach them how.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 1Tonne
Upvote 0

1Tonne

Well-Known Member
Dec 2, 2021
1,206
724
49
Taranaki
✟137,436.00
Country
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
I agree that evangelists should be going out and telling the Good News. Going out and telling people in the parks and streets. That is what an evangelist does. But the actual gifting of an evangelist, was so that they church could be equipped to learn how to share. In saying this, one of your last comments is spot on. "You can't make a person fly by telling them to fly." Just as you can't make a person tell the Gospel to the lost by just saying they should. The driving factor in spreading the Gospel is Love. A love for your God and a love for your neighbour. If God truly wants something, then because we love Him, we will do our best regarding this. And if we truly love our neighbour, then we would not simply allow them to perish. (NOTE: "If you are fearful to share your faith, don’t pray for less fear, pray for more love." Ray Comfort)
I heard a quote from a famous person, and it went something like this. "If you know of everlasting life, and you know of everlasting death, how much do you have to hate somebody to not tell them of it?" So, if we love them, we will warn them. Love is the driving factor.

Now. Let's say that I agree that the gift of evangelism is only to go out to the lost and proclaim the Good News. It is not so that people in the church will be equipped. Do we now say that the only people who evangelize to strangers are those with the gifting? If this is the case, are we really loving our neighbour?
If we only share the Gospel with the people who we have created a friendship with, is that loving to those that are not our friends? We should love all. We should share the Gospel with all people. Just as the good Samaritan helped a person he did not know. We should be telling all people. Not just friends.

I think a lot of the issue is, many believers think that they are saying the Gospel by their actions. They mix up being a witness with sharing the Good News. By simply being nice they believe that people will know about the cross. With this belief a person will then think that the Gospel does not need to be said and that they can simply be friends with unbelievers.
 
Upvote 0

shadowhunter

+collaboratively study, ~ debate, -fight.
Site Supporter
Apr 19, 2008
256
63
✟84,340.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
During the mid 80's in Utah, there was a great revival where Christians were sharing with Mormons. One church grew from 60 to 300 in a year, others doubled in size. Then a seminarian cam in and promoted the idea of friendship evangelism, and the revival died. As I said, I like the way you think, I just don't think it comes from that scripture.

People share what they love. They talk about TV shows or movies at work. If a guy is embarrassed to be seen with his wife, does he really love her? I don't need scripture to make that case but we could use:

Luke 7:36-50​

Much Forgiveness, Much Love​

36 Then one of the Pharisees invited Him to eat with him. He entered the Pharisee’s house and reclined at the table. 37 And a woman in the town who was a sinner found out that Jesus was reclining at the table in the Pharisee’s house. She brought an alabaster jar of fragrant oil 38 and stood behind Him at His feet, weeping, and began to wash His feet with her tears. She wiped His feet with the hair of her head, kissing them and anointing them with the fragrant oil.

39 When the Pharisee who had invited Him saw this, he said to himself, “This man, if He were a prophet, would know who and what kind of woman this is who is touching Him—she’s a sinner!”

40 Jesus replied to him, “Simon, I have something to say to you.”
“Teacher,” he said, “say it.”

41 “A creditor had two debtors. One owed 500 denarii, and the other 50. 42 Since they could not pay it back, he graciously forgave them both. So, which of them will love him more?”

43 Simon answered, “I suppose the one he forgave more.”
“You have judged correctly,” He told him. 44 Turning to the woman, He said to Simon, “Do you see this woman? I entered your house; you gave Me no water for My feet, but she, with her tears, has washed My feet and wiped them with her hair. 45 You gave Me no kiss, but she hasn’t stopped kissing My feet since I came in. 46 You didn’t anoint My head with olive oil, but she has anointed My feet with fragrant oil. 47 Therefore I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven; that’s why[a] she loved much. But the one who is forgiven little, loves little.” 48 Then He said to her, “Your sins are forgiven.”

49 Those who were at the table with Him began to say among themselves, “Who is this man who even forgives sins?”

50 And He said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you. Go in peace.”

We speak of her love for Christ, but how much more did he have for her... being unashamed to be seen with her.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 1Tonne
Upvote 0

1Tonne

Well-Known Member
Dec 2, 2021
1,206
724
49
Taranaki
✟137,436.00
Country
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Yes. I have thought a lot about those that have been forgiven of much will love much. Love being an action.
Also, I think a lot about true belief. If you truly believe something, then you will act upon it. If many are condemned, how can we not warn all people. Not just our friends.

As I said, I like the way you think, I just don't think it comes from that scripture.
I do not base proclamation evangelism off Ephesians 4:11. I just use that so that people stop using the excuse that they are not an evangelist and so they do not have to warn everyone. I believe that we are all to proclaim as often as we can. We are His disciples in this age, and we are to be like Jesus. He proclaimed the Kingdom of God everywhere he went and then the disciples saw this and they copied. They did not simply tell their friends about the condemnation that they were under. They told everyone. And as they did this, people did not like the message and in the end 11 or them we killed for the message. If we only ever tell our friends, then we are not really doing as Christ done. Are we really taking up our cross?

"And He said to them, “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to all creation." Mark 16:15

“The one who has My commandments and keeps them is the one who loves Me.” …. John 14:21

“Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.” James 2:22

The cowardly, unbelieving, murderers, sexually immoral, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone Rev 21:8
(A good question to ask, is who are the cowardly?)

"Jesus said, “He who believes in Me, out of his heart will flow rivers of living water” John 7:38 (Altered)

Faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead. James 2:17

"How then are they to call on Him in whom they have not believed? How are they to believe in Him whom they have not heard? And how are they to hear without a preacher?" Romans 10:14

For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each may be repaid for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil. Therefore, knowing the fear of the Lord, we persuade men 2 Cor 5:10-11

“The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Therefore, plead with the Lord of the harvest to send out workers into His harvest.” Matt 9:37

Open rebuke is better than love carefully concealed Pro 27:5

And many others
 
Upvote 0

Carl Emerson

Well-Known Member
Dec 18, 2017
15,510
10,385
79
Auckland
✟438,205.00
Country
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
We are His disciples in this age, and we are to be like Jesus. He proclaimed the Kingdom of God everywhere he went

As a matter of interest- do you see signs confirming the Kingdom as He did ???
 
Upvote 0

Carl Emerson

Well-Known Member
Dec 18, 2017
15,510
10,385
79
Auckland
✟438,205.00
Country
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Mark talks about signs following the preaching and believing.

Jesus assured John the Baptist that the Kingdom was indeed being manifest by testifying about the poor being preached to, ailments cured etc.

So where Jesus reigns one would expect these signs to confirm the Word.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Pioneer3mm
Upvote 0

1Tonne

Well-Known Member
Dec 2, 2021
1,206
724
49
Taranaki
✟137,436.00
Country
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
So where Jesus reigns one would expect these signs to confirm the Word.
So, if someone does not have miracles happening, then they should not be sharing the Gospel publicly?
So, that would mean that someone like Ray Comfort is in the wrong by going out. He should not be proclaiming the Gospel as he does not have miracles. Is he in the wrong?
The miracle I see is people's hearts being changed. Awesome. That is the biggest miracle. From death to life. WOW

What miracles follow you as you share the Gospel?

In reality, Mark 16:16-17 is not talking about those that proclaim the Gospel, but the believers. This video may help you to understand the verse.
 
Last edited:
Upvote 0

Carl Emerson

Well-Known Member
Dec 18, 2017
15,510
10,385
79
Auckland
✟438,205.00
Country
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
So, if someone does not have miracles happening, then they should not be sharing the Gospel publicly?
So, that would mean that someone like Ray Comfort is in the wrong by going out. He should not be proclaiming the Gospel as he does not have miracles. Is he in the wrong?
The miracle I see is people's hearts being changed. Awesome. That is the biggest miracle. From death to life. WOW

What miracles follow you as you share the Gospel?

In reality, Mark 16:16-17 is not talking about those that proclaim the Gospel, but the believers. This video may help you to understand the verse.

I worked along side Ray...

You have a very set theology it seems so discussion is unlikely to be fruitful.
 
Upvote 0

1Tonne

Well-Known Member
Dec 2, 2021
1,206
724
49
Taranaki
✟137,436.00
Country
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
I worked along side Ray...

You have a very set theology it seems so discussion is unlikely to be fruitful.
How long did you work with Ray?

If someone can show me biblically where we are to do friendship evangelism over proclamation, then I would be willing to consider. You will notice that even Ray gets annoyed by friendship evangelism.
 
Upvote 0

Carl Emerson

Well-Known Member
Dec 18, 2017
15,510
10,385
79
Auckland
✟438,205.00
Country
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
I gave Ray on the spot prayer support back in the day, and did the photography for one of his books.

I am not arguing as you suppose.

However my partner in ministry was the late Neville Logan, who had a wonderful ability to lead young people to Christ.

He would wander into a place where they frequented downtown, and speak about Jesus with immediate response. When a dozen or so had come into the kingdom he would ask if anyone had a sickness, injury or whatever. Then he would invite them (the new believers) to pray for those who responded in Jesus name with astounding success - healing was common place. This attracted more to commit to Jesus.

Sadly our theologies dismiss any expectation of God moving this way.
 
Last edited:
Upvote 0

1Tonne

Well-Known Member
Dec 2, 2021
1,206
724
49
Taranaki
✟137,436.00
Country
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Sadly out theologies dismiss any expectation of God moving this way.
I do not dismiss God working in that way. I have had other believers say that they work in the gift of healing, and I have asked them to come along with me when I evangelise. It would be great if someone was healed (blind to see and the deaf to hear) and then we were to tell the healed person the Gospel. But these people that say that they have this gift, have never turned up.

So, I do not dismiss this at all. I would love for someone with the gift of healing to join me. I believe God can do miracles.

I will admit though. I am hesitant toward some people who say that they have the gift of healing. I have seen Todd White do the leg lengthening thing and it annoys me a lot. I once had a chiropractor do the same trick on me. She pushed my legs and pulled on them until I was at an angle that one leg was longer than the other. She then told me to look, and sure enough, they were different lengths. Then she said that she was amazed that I was still walking. But I knew what she was doing. She was as shady as they could come. LOL.
I also have seen a couple of other healers do the same trick. Very frustrating.
God can do miracles.
 
Upvote 0

Carl Emerson

Well-Known Member
Dec 18, 2017
15,510
10,385
79
Auckland
✟438,205.00
Country
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
You might find my testimony an interesting read...

 
Upvote 0

1Tonne

Well-Known Member
Dec 2, 2021
1,206
724
49
Taranaki
✟137,436.00
Country
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
You might find my testimony an interesting read...

That I do like a lot. Awesome.
As your testimony has said. Those things do not happen every day. It is over a lifetime. I have only been sharing the Gospel in public for only a year. So, I will have exceeding joy when those things do happen. Excited. Thank for that.
 
Upvote 0

Carl Emerson

Well-Known Member
Dec 18, 2017
15,510
10,385
79
Auckland
✟438,205.00
Country
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
That I do like a lot. Awesome.
As your testimony has said. Those things do not happen every day. It is over a lifetime. I have only been sharing the Gospel in public for only a year. So, I will have exceeding joy when those things do happen. Excited. Thank for that.

I think few expect God to move in that way.

A good idea is to ask Him to create opportunity to pray for folks.

It is easy to forget that people generally have a lot more interest in Christianity than most Christians think.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 1Tonne
Upvote 0

1Tonne

Well-Known Member
Dec 2, 2021
1,206
724
49
Taranaki
✟137,436.00
Country
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
I think few expect God to move in that way.

A good idea is to ask Him to create opportunity to pray for folks.

It is easy to forget that people generally have a lot more interest in Christianity than most Christians think.
Sadly, looking back to about 2 months ago, I said the Gospel to a young lady (about 30 years old) who had just been told that she had terminal cancer. I didn't even think to pray for healing. A missed opportunity. Bummer.
Note taken. Don't miss those opportunities.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Carl Emerson
Upvote 0

Carl Emerson

Well-Known Member
Dec 18, 2017
15,510
10,385
79
Auckland
✟438,205.00
Country
New Zealand
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Sadly, looking back to about 2 months ago, I said the Gospel to a young lady (about 30 years old) who had just been told that she had terminal cancer. I didn't even think to pray for healing. A missed opportunity. Bummer.
Note taken. Don't miss those opportunities.

Right on the button.

And don't get hung up on gifts or not... - Just keep in mind that He moves sovereignly :)
 
  • Like
Reactions: 1Tonne
Upvote 0

Dave G.

Well-Known Member
May 22, 2017
4,676
5,343
75
Sandiwich
✟377,032.00
Country
United States
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Widowed
May name is David. Speaking the Gospel is very important on my heart and I may do that at any given time, in a pulpit, in a hardware store etc. That's seed planting. As far as someone specifically on my heart goes, I figure that person was placed there by God. And I've literally spoken out from my heart what I believe to be the voice of the Holy Spirit, " now David go talk to him/her," as the case may be. And it may be after years. Do you guys hear from God ? I ask because chosen 1 on 1 evangelists should.. We get our marching orders from Him. A pastor friend of mine has gotten the order to cross a street and stand on the corner. The thing is to obey when really you don't want to cross the street, so he crosses and stands. Low and behold someone destitute for the gospel shows up and he shares.

My wife and I make, give away, even have sold Christian T Shirts. They bring up many opportunities to witness and even are a witness just to wear them. Great ice breakers for seed planting. Understand that we don't convert anyone, that's Gods job in all this. Even if we lead them all the way it's not us but Him working in that persons heart.
Get past the fear of speaking the gospel that was mentioned above. I was asked by a young lady clerk my wife and I see in the grocery store, " how many T Shirts do you guys have anyway, you always have on a different verse" ? I replied as many as whatever verse inspires us at a given time and we haven't touched how many there are in the bible. My wife asked her her favorite verse, she had to really think because it had been a while. She spit one up eventually. Then the wife " what's your favorite color" ? And we made her a shirt, a week or so later we gave it to her.. It got her back to church with her young son, where she was complimented on the shirt.

I like cut vinyl lettering heat pressed on. The wife likes prettier scenic types inkjet printed on transfer paper, and I heat press those on for her. We have a printer, a Cricut and a clam shell heat press and stocks of rolled heat press vinyl in several colors and always heat transfer paper in stock. Today her grandson is being baptized, we made two shirts to give him. He's already accepted our Lord, today is his day to take a dunk after church, Praise God !

We are called to be active in our faith are we not ? Don't stress on the details of that.
 
Upvote 0

Pioneer3mm

Well-Known Member
Site Supporter
Aug 12, 2018
1,776
1,364
North America
✟715,058.00
Country
United States
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Do you guys hear from God ? I ask because chosen 1 on 1 evangelists should.. We get our marching orders from Him. A pastor friend of mine has gotten the order to cross a street and stand on the corner. The thing is to obey when really you don't want to cross the street, so he crosses and stands. Low and behold someone destitute for the gospel shows up and he shares.
Good point..
---
I was involved in 'street evangelism/outreach'..years ago.
 
Upvote 0