Tips for a Long-Distance relationship?

[SingularityOne]

Any tips from y’all who have been in a Long Distance relationship with your significant other? - I want to keep it healthy.

 

[ArmyMatt]

be with each other physically as often as possible.

pray.

be very patient with each other.

 

[Pavel Mosko]

Any tips from y’all who have been in a Long Distance relationship with your significant other? - I want to keep it healthy.

I guess you should consider calling or skyping every day, unless she explicitly say she doesn't want that.


I initially had a system of calling every other day, which I thought was optimal (not too clingy, but also frequent enough) and my girl friend was happy with that to start with, but after 4-6 weeks of that she gently nudged me over to calling every day.

 

[E.C.]

Be VERY patient.
Visit each other physically whenever possible.
And communicate often.

 

[bèlla]

Develop a timeline and discuss it frequently. Some day and one day will derail you. There should be steady progression towards an outcome you've agreed upon.

Be flexible and attentive. You'll have moments when the distance takes a toll and evokes sadness or frustration. Don't blame each other when it happens. Be realistic about visits and their frequency. Look for travel deals if needed and stay on top of them. You'll need discretionary income for last minute deals. But the savings are good.

Flyertalk is a good resource for that. Sign up for reward programs and double dip. Make your money work for you. I earned a heap of frequent flier miles through long distance calls. We paid back then.

Be creative. Find unique ways to celebrate togetherness. Shared meals, online events, movies/TV programs, devotionals, etc. Making an effort to do things together bridges the gap.

I shared some ideas for videos with someone the other day. They're wholesome ways to show you care and memorable gestures you won't forget.

Thinking of you, funny things, maybe poetry or a line from his favorite book. Positive messages and scripture quotes. If I’m creative, maybe a drawing or a song. I’d play or sing for him. Pick me up messages when he’s having a rough day or I miss you’s when he’s busy.

Finally, forgive often. You'll make mistakes and have off days. Remember what you're working towards and show grace. Good luck.

Yours in His Service,

~bella

 

[SingularityOne]

be with each other physically as often as possible.

pray.

be very patient with each other.

Like monthly?

Agreed on prayer.

curious as to what you mean regarding being patient with each other. I don’t think I fully understand.

 

[SingularityOne]

I guess you should consider calling or skyping every day, unless she explicitly say she doesn't want that.


I initially had a system of calling every other day, which I thought was optimal (not too clingy, but also frequent enough) and my girl friend was happy with that to start with, but after 4-6 weeks of that she gently nudged me over to calling every day.

Yeah, we text a lot, but phone calling is something she has brought up. How long did you talk (usually) on those phone calls? I’m sure it varied.

 

[SingularityOne]

Develop a timeline and discuss it frequently. Some day and one day will derail you. There should be steady progression towards an outcome you've agreed upon.

Be flexible and attentive. You'll have moments when the distance takes a toll and evokes sadness or frustration. Don't blame each other when it happens. Be realistic about visits and their frequency. Look for travel deals if needed and stay on top of them. You'll need discretionary income for last minute deals. But the savings are good.

Flyertalk is a good resource for that. Sign up for reward programs and double dip. Make your money work for you. I earned a heap of frequent flier miles through long distance calls. We paid back then.

Be creative. Find unique ways to celebrate togetherness. Shared meals, online events, movies/TV programs, devotionals, etc. Making an effort to do things together bridges the gap.

I shared some ideas for videos with someone the other day. They're wholesome ways to show you care and memorable gestures you won't forget.

Thinking of you, funny things, maybe poetry or a line from his favorite book. Positive messages and scripture quotes. If I’m creative, maybe a drawing or a song. I’d play or sing for him. Pick me up messages when he’s having a rough day or I miss you’s when he’s busy.

Finally, forgive often. You'll make mistakes and have off days. Remember what you're working towards and show grace. Good luck.

Yours in His Service,

~bella

I’ll keep all of this in mind. Thanks so much.

 

[ArmyMatt]

Like monthly?

curious as to what you mean regarding being patient with each other. I don’t think I fully understand.

as often as possible, if you can. if more than monthly that'd be preferable.

be patient since you won't actually be together and able to communicate as often as ideal.

 

[SingularityOne]

as often as possible, if you can. if more than monthly that'd be preferable.

be patient since you won't actually be together and able to communicate as often as ideal.

It’s hard being in grad school and doing long distance. It makes monthly visits actually seem like a lot, haha... sadly...

yeah, that makes sense. Thanks!

 

[ArmyMatt]

It’s hard being in grad school and doing long distance. It makes monthly visits actually seem like a lot, haha... sadly...

yeah, that makes sense. Thanks!

it's rough, but it can work. I was a time zone away from my now wife when we were dating.

 

[Pavel Mosko]

Yeah, we text a lot, but phone calling is something she has brought up. How long did you talk (usually) on those phone calls? I’m sure it varied.

They were kind of long to start out with especially when I was on my every other day system in the first few weeks. But got shorter as time went on, unless something major happened to talk about. The advantage of going daily is, things get a bit more normalized faster. (It's less like being on a first date or early date where you feel pressure to keep up the conversation, and more like dealing with an older friend or relative).

 

[SingularityOne]

it's rough, but it can work. I was a time zone away from my now wife when we were dating.

How often did you see each other and how long did you date before getting engaged (and then married)?

 

[SingularityOne]

They were kind of long to start out with especially when I was on my every other day system in the first few weeks. But got shorter as time went on, unless something major happened to talk about. The advantage of going daily is, things get a bit more normalized faster. (It's less like being on a first date or early date where you feel pressure to keep up the conversation, and more like dealing with an older friend or relative).

Yeah, that makes sense. This is helpful to know though. Thanks for sharing your experience. I’ll have to figure out how to do this with our schedules.

 

[ArmyMatt]

How often did you see each other and how long did you date before getting engaged (and then married)?

around once a month. and we dated for about 2 years.

 

[E.C.]

It’s hard being in grad school and doing long distance. It makes monthly visits actually seem like a lot, haha... sadly...

yeah, that makes sense. Thanks!

Hey man, if I could maintain a long distance relationship that's one language, two time zones, and three countries away you'll be fine. Heck, at one point there was an entire ocean and eighteen hours between us!

 

[SingularityOne]

around once a month. and we dated for about 2 years.

That's what we are hoping to do frequency-wise. - That's a long time for long-distance (regarding the time before engagement/marriage).

 

[SingularityOne]

Hey man, if I could maintain a long distance relationship that's one language, two time zones, and three countries away you'll be fine. Heck, at one point there was an entire ocean and eighteen hours between us!

Dang! That's some resilience. I'm glad y'all were able to close the distance eventually! How long did y'all date for before marriage?

 

[ArmyMatt]

That's what we are hoping to do frequency-wise. - That's a long time for long-distance (regarding the time before engagement/marriage).

yep, it can work.

 

[E.C.]

Dang! That's some resilience. I'm glad y'all were able to close the distance eventually! How long did y'all date for before marriage?

Haven't married yet. Between the Navy, covid, and the visa process...