help! i do not want this! please help!

[Kostilaks]

I was watching a youtube video and suddenly unwanted thoughts came. my ocd was like "make a promise not to watch this video" and words without my will come to my mind.

I am worried if I made a promise to the Generic God not to watch that video. I know I should just ignore but I feel so anxious that I am ready to stop watching the video. and I get another thought without my will from ocd that calms me down like " ignore the anxious thought and watch the video if you close it it maybe would be as if you accepted the thought"

but I was not able to find the video I was planning to watch. and now ocd is like "you cant see it? so then it maybe means you accepted the ocd thoughts"

the problem is I do not know if the thoughts were mine. or not. they cant be mine. they are thoughts without my will. but seem so real. now I worry due to ocd who is telling me stuff like " maybe you made a double promise to the Generic God"

I was forced to say to Generic God to consider that I watched the video just to be sure but I remember an old ocd thought without my will that was telling me "you must believe the Generic God's power and stop trying to prove to Him all the time that it is ocd's fault cause He knows it and keep doing it it may result in something bad"

i do not know what to do anymore. all these thoughts were without my will and happened in seconds. i cant control them. they seem real even thought they are without my will.

 

[God is good]

I was watching a youtube video and suddenly unwanted thoughts came. my ocd was like "make a promise not to watch this video" and words without my will come to my mind.

I am worried if I made a promise to the Generic God not to watch that video. I know I should just ignore but I feel so anxious that I am ready to stop watching the video. and I get another thought without my will from ocd that calms me down like " ignore the anxious thought and watch the video if you close it it maybe would be as if you accepted the thought"

but I was not able to find the video I was planning to watch. and now ocd is like "you cant see it? so then it maybe means you accepted the ocd thoughts"

the problem is I do not know if the thoughts were mine. or not. they cant be mine. they are thoughts without my will. but seem so real. now I worry due to ocd who is telling me stuff like " maybe you made a double promise to the Generic God"

I was forced to say to Generic God to consider that I watched the video just to be sure but I remember an old ocd thought without my will that was telling me "you must believe the Generic God's power and stop trying to prove to Him all the time that it is ocd's fault cause He knows it and keep doing it it may result in something bad"

i do not know what to do anymore. all these thoughts were without my will and happened in seconds. i cant control them. they seem real even thought they are without my will.

Hello buddy, I have read a few of your posts and I just want you to know that God loves you. I know that these ocd thoughts seem like they're yours but they're not because if they were really your thoughts you wouldn't have anxiety about them. Just remember to read the Bible because there is only one God and that is Jesus Christ. God really loves you and you can be healed because God can do anything. God bless you and Jesus is Lord.

 

[Mari17]

I was watching a youtube video and suddenly unwanted thoughts came. my ocd was like "make a promise not to watch this video" and words without my will come to my mind.

I am worried if I made a promise to the Generic God not to watch that video. I know I should just ignore but I feel so anxious that I am ready to stop watching the video. and I get another thought without my will from ocd that calms me down like " ignore the anxious thought and watch the video if you close it it maybe would be as if you accepted the thought"

but I was not able to find the video I was planning to watch. and now ocd is like "you cant see it? so then it maybe means you accepted the ocd thoughts"

the problem is I do not know if the thoughts were mine. or not. they cant be mine. they are thoughts without my will. but seem so real. now I worry due to ocd who is telling me stuff like " maybe you made a double promise to the Generic God"

I was forced to say to Generic God to consider that I watched the video just to be sure but I remember an old ocd thought without my will that was telling me "you must believe the Generic God's power and stop trying to prove to Him all the time that it is ocd's fault cause He knows it and keep doing it it may result in something bad"

i do not know what to do anymore. all these thoughts were without my will and happened in seconds. i cant control them. they seem real even thought they are without my will.

This seems to be a type of intrusive thought, and your job is to ignore them and to do the opposite of what they tell you. So if they tell you to stop watching a video, keep watching it. Or vice versa.

Are you getting therapy for your OCD?

Also, I've been watching some of these videos, and so far the ones I've watched have been pretty good. Trigger warning: some talk about sexual or violent obsessions, so if that bothers you, pass on those.

I also highly recommend watching the "Noise in Your Head" video series if you haven't already. And anything by Dr. Stephen Phillipson!