The Performance Trap...? How do we get out of it...?

Neogaia777

Old Soul
Supporter
Oct 10, 2011
23,277
5,237
45
Oregon
✟952,487.00
Country
United States
Faith
Non-Denom
Marital Status
Celibate
I think it's the road of good intentions in the following message.

It is living a holy life because you want to, not because you have to. And when you find yourself falling short through the weakness of your flesh, you talk to God about it and receive forgiveness and cleansing.

Yes, "Intention", the reasons behind what you are doing and more importantly, the "why" right...? I think you'll quickly get burnt out if you don't have the right "why's" right...? Or why's to your why's right...?

And when you realize not a whole lot is actually required, but is mostly for your own benefit anyway...?

Anyway, thanks guys,

God Bless!
 
Upvote 0

Neogaia777

Old Soul
Supporter
Oct 10, 2011
23,277
5,237
45
Oregon
✟952,487.00
Country
United States
Faith
Non-Denom
Marital Status
Celibate
Yes, "Intention", the reasons behind what you are doing and more importantly, the "why" right...? I think you'll quickly get burnt out if you don't have the right "why's" right...? Or why's to your why's right...?

And when you realize not a whole lot is actually required, but is mostly for your own benefit anyway...?

Anyway, thanks guys,

God Bless!
And it shouldn't be like, "Oh I'm really trying very very hard and exerting myself so strenuously to absolute Nth degree, so I can...?" "What" again exactly...?

Anyway,

God Bless!
 
Last edited:
Upvote 0

Neogaia777

Old Soul
Supporter
Oct 10, 2011
23,277
5,237
45
Oregon
✟952,487.00
Country
United States
Faith
Non-Denom
Marital Status
Celibate
People will sometimes use feeling guilty as a way to bypass other difficult feelings or making positive changes in their life.
I'm really not that overwhelmingly guilt ridden, and, matter of fact, that is part of my concern really...?

Sure I might feel a little bit from time to time, but/and/because I even sometimes wonder if it shouldn't be "more"... if I'm compromising too much, ect... getting to comfortable in things that maybe I shouldn't, or shouldn't be, ect...?

God Bless!
 
Upvote 0

FireDragon76

Well-Known Member
Supporter
Apr 30, 2013
30,474
18,454
Orlando, Florida
✟1,249,090.00
Country
United States
Faith
United Ch. of Christ
Marital Status
Legal Union (Other)
Politics
US-Democrat
I'm really not that overwhelmingly guilt ridden, and, matter of fact, that is part of my concern really...?

Sure I might feel a little bit from time to time, but/and/because I even sometimes wonder if it shouldn't be "more"... if I'm compromising too much, ect... getting to comfortable in things that maybe I shouldn't, or shouldn't be, ect...?

God Bless!

You could go nuts thinking about morality in the abstract... so my advice is don't.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Neogaia777
Upvote 0

Grip Docility

Well-Known Member
Nov 27, 2017
4,425
1,720
North America
✟83,484.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
You could go nuts thinking about morality in the abstract... so my advice is don't.
I'm really not that overwhelmingly guilt ridden, and, matter of fact, that is part of my concern really...?

Sure I might feel a little bit from time to time, but/and/because I even sometimes wonder if it shouldn't be "more"... if I'm compromising too much, ect... getting to comfortable in things that maybe I shouldn't, or shouldn't be, ect...?

God Bless!

Peace... that passes... Understanding. :)
 
Upvote 0

Lost4words

Jesus I Trust In You
Supporter
May 19, 2018
10,943
11,698
Neath
✟1,002,191.00
Country
United Kingdom
Faith
Catholic
Marital Status
Single
In my view, a performance-based Christian is one who is trying to justify himself through his works; while a grace-based Christian rests in Christ, ceases from his own works, and allows the Holy Spirit to work holiness and sanctification in him.

May i ask, how does on do that? Thanks
 
Upvote 0

Peter J Barban

Well-Known Member
Mar 29, 2016
1,474
973
62
Taiwan
Visit site
✟97,647.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
1. Make sure that you are saved.
A lot of people are just Christian in culture only, they do not have the Holy Spirit helping them live a Christian life.

2. Let go of past failure, then press forward.
Meditate on Philippians 3:
12Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. 13Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

3. Work with the Holy Spirit
Every Christian is given one or more spiritual gifts. God wants you to use them to serve him. So, make it your priority to discover and use your spiritual gift. In working with the Holy Spirit, you will see more success in life and ministry.

4. Be disciplined
Most people create their own failures. Build holy habits that avoid temptation, discipline your tongue and fear the Lord. And when you do fail, go back to step 1 and 2.
 
Upvote 0
This site stays free and accessible to all because of donations from people like you.
Consider making a one-time or monthly donation. We appreciate your support!
- Dan Doughty and Team Christian Forums

Presbyterian Continuist

Senior Veteran
Supporter
Mar 28, 2005
21,810
10,792
76
Christchurch New Zealand
Visit site
✟827,033.00
Country
New Zealand
Faith
Charismatic
Marital Status
Married
May i ask, how does on do that? Thanks
Under the Law one asks, "Is it right to do, or not to do, this?" Under grace, it is: "Is it beneficial?"
 
Upvote 0

Cement

Active Member
Mar 24, 2018
320
257
37
Austin
✟55,782.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Celibate
I think you should remove yourself from any situation that might cause you to sin. For instance when I want to study i cant do so in my room because I have to be in an environment that induces me to read and focus thus i go to a library. When I want to watch a film I often times just go to the movies. Ever since I became a Christian I wanted to devote at least two months of my time to meditative prayer and perhaps I could one day visit the desert fathers who go at it alone since they know much more about how stay pure of heart. I dont think it is easy to do so but with Gods help you can change your desires and attain a new higher level of motivation.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Neogaia777
Upvote 0

Presbyterian Continuist

Senior Veteran
Supporter
Mar 28, 2005
21,810
10,792
76
Christchurch New Zealand
Visit site
✟827,033.00
Country
New Zealand
Faith
Charismatic
Marital Status
Married
Sin? Didn't Jesus take all that on the cross with Him when He died for us? If one is dominated by constant sinning and repenting, then they still need to understand what the grace of God is all about.

I just read about a person receiving Christ and then all his life without assurance and joy of his salvation, and at the end, reaching glory and realising that he was saved all along but didn't know it. Then he decided to take a law suit against Satan for lying to him and harassing him about his shortcomings and failures all his life, when, under grace, he could have lived a life of joy and victory instead of being weighed down under a burden of sinfulness that he didn't have to bear.
 
Upvote 0

bèlla

❤️
Supporter
Jan 16, 2019
20,480
17,638
USA
✟933,160.00
Country
United States
Faith
Non-Denom
Marital Status
In Relationship
I don’t believe we were meant to mimic hamsters running on a wheel and if you watch them the point sinks in.

The way out is to determine what’s feeding your behavior (root cause), the actions which contribute to its continuance (habits), and the benefit you receive for its maintenance. There’s always a payoff. Mental scripts often fall in this category. Here’s a poem that illustrates the principle.

I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost .... I am helpless.
It isn't my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend that I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I am in this same place.
But, it isn't my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in ... it's a habit ... but, my eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

I walk down another street.


It is impossible to avoid a trap you’re unwilling to face. And you can’t thoroughly address it without admitting uncomfortable truths.

The issue at hand isn’t the appearance of guilt. But why we find ourselves unable to move beyond the repentance and forgiveness we’ve sought. Why are we stuck? What is our immobility supporting? Unworthiness? Self-pity? Fear of the unknown?

That’s the stumbling block which prevents you from taking another path. It’s the difference between performance and peace.

No matter how swiftly we run. Irrespective of the guilt and self-recrimination we harbor. Christ said it is finished. We have no capacity to surpass His words. No measure of shame or unworthiness will diminish its end.

It is done. We must operate in the fullness of its meaning. When we sin it remains unchanged and doesn’t alter when we fail. Oftentimes the magnitude of His embrace in light of the ways we fall short is too magnificent to accept.

But we couldn’t lessen His love or grace if we tried. Take a different path and welcome the peace which passes all comprehension. It’s waiting for your embrace. Receive it.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Neogaia777
Upvote 0
This site stays free and accessible to all because of donations from people like you.
Consider making a one-time or monthly donation. We appreciate your support!
- Dan Doughty and Team Christian Forums

Lost4words

Jesus I Trust In You
Supporter
May 19, 2018
10,943
11,698
Neath
✟1,002,191.00
Country
United Kingdom
Faith
Catholic
Marital Status
Single
Sin? Didn't Jesus take all that on the cross with Him when He died for us? If one is dominated by constant sinning and repenting, then they still need to understand what the grace of God is all about.

I just read about a person receiving Christ and then all his life without assurance and joy of his salvation, and at the end, reaching glory and realising that he was saved all along but didn't know it. Then he decided to take a law suit against Satan for lying to him and harassing him about his shortcomings and failures all his life, when, under grace, he could have lived a life of joy and victory instead of being weighed down under a burden of sinfulness that he didn't have to bear.

You wrote:

Under the Law one asks, "Is it right to do, or not to do, this?" Under grace, it is: "Is it beneficial?"

I was asking, is that in relation to sin?
 
Upvote 0

Gregory Thompson

Change is inevitable, feel free to spare some.
Supporter
Dec 20, 2009
28,362
7,742
Canada
✟721,286.00
Country
Canada
Faith
Christian Seeker
Marital Status
Married
Thanks,

But isn't two roads like two extremes, and life seems like a "balancing act", ect...?

God Bless!
The performance trap is a mentality we take on ourselves, nothing coming from it pleases God, so it's best to discard and live by trust.

that's what I get anyway.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Neogaia777
Upvote 0

Presbyterian Continuist

Senior Veteran
Supporter
Mar 28, 2005
21,810
10,792
76
Christchurch New Zealand
Visit site
✟827,033.00
Country
New Zealand
Faith
Charismatic
Marital Status
Married
You wrote:

Under the Law one asks, "Is it right to do, or not to do, this?" Under grace, it is: "Is it beneficial?"

I was asking, is that in relation to sin?
You seem to want to bring this back to sin as if you have a strong sin consciousness. The question is: "How much of your sin did Jesus take upon Himself when He died on the cross?" And, how much of your sinful flesh did the righteousness of Christ cover? The answer to those questions will show how much of a Saviour you think Jesus is.

Now, I want you not to think about a pink elephant in striped pajamas. While trying not to think of the elephant, close your eyes. What do you see?

This is what being preoccupied with sin is all about. Sin is the pink elephant in striped pajamas. It dominates your thinking. As much as you try to stop thinking about sin, it still occupies your mind, and therefore your preoccupation with sin colours your Christian experience. So when you pray, read the Bible, or do any other duty to God, the thought of sin comes in and interrupts. It is like trying to read the Bible when a group of rowdy hooligans are whooping it up right outside your window. The intrusion is not welcome, because you want to pray and read your Bible, but the intrusion is distracting you.

That is what preoccupation with sin is like. Satan is the interrupter. When you want to pray, read your Bible, or serve God in any other way, he reminds you of how sinful you are. He harasses you with your faults and failings so that you can't concentrate on pray and Bible study.

You have to lay your sin and sinfulness on Christ, and allow His righteousness to totally cover it. Start thinking about His righteousness, His love, His grace and mercy, His blessings on your life, and allow those to dominate your thinking.
 
  • Useful
Reactions: Neogaia777
Upvote 0

Lost4words

Jesus I Trust In You
Supporter
May 19, 2018
10,943
11,698
Neath
✟1,002,191.00
Country
United Kingdom
Faith
Catholic
Marital Status
Single
You seem to want to bring this back to sin as if you have a strong sin consciousness. The question is: "How much of your sin did Jesus take upon Himself when He died on the cross?" And, how much of your sinful flesh did the righteousness of Christ cover? The answer to those questions will show how much of a Saviour you think Jesus is.

I want you to now think of a pink elephant in striped pajamas. Form that image in your mind. Now, I want you not to think about the pink elephant in striped pajamas. While trying not to think of the elephant, close your eyes. What do you see?

This is what being preoccupied with sin is all about. Sin is the pink elephant in striped pajamas. It dominates your thinking. As much as you try to stop thinking about sin, it still occupies your mind, and therefore your preoccupation with sin colours your Christian experience. So when you pray, read the Bible, or do any other duty to God, the thought of sin comes in and interrupts. It is like trying to read the Bible when a group of rowdy hooligans are whooping it up right outside your window. The intrusion is not welcome, because you want to pray and read your Bible, but the intrusion is distracting you.

That is what preoccupation with sin is like. Satan is the interrupter. When you want to pray, read your Bible, or serve God in any other way, he reminds you of how sinful you are. He harasses you with your faults and failings so that you can't concentrate on pray and Bible study.

You have to lay your sin and sinfulness on Christ, and allow His righteousness to totally cover it. Start thinking about His righteousness, His love, His grace and mercy, His blessings on your life, and allow those to dominate your thinking.

I was only asking what you meant by the quoted words.
 
Upvote 0
This site stays free and accessible to all because of donations from people like you.
Consider making a one-time or monthly donation. We appreciate your support!
- Dan Doughty and Team Christian Forums

Presbyterian Continuist

Senior Veteran
Supporter
Mar 28, 2005
21,810
10,792
76
Christchurch New Zealand
Visit site
✟827,033.00
Country
New Zealand
Faith
Charismatic
Marital Status
Married
I was only asking what you meant by the quoted words.
Paul says that all things are lawful to him. What he means is that under grace, nothing is sinful, because sin is the transgression of the law, so if he says that all things are lawful to him, then he is free to do what he wants while under grace and not under law. This is why Paul's gospel was so objectionable to the legalistic Jews, and for anyone else who gives dominance to the law in the way they choose to live a holy life. They are bound in the right/wrong syndrome, while Paul is free from that.

What he goes on to say is that not all things are expedient. In other words, there are thoughts and actions that are not beneficial to a person whose heart strongly desires holiness. The Christian is then going to do those things that are beneficial to a truly holy life.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Neogaia777
Upvote 0