What's on your mind?

[MehGuy]

Ya'll are being kinda mean.

Mean to who?

 

[alsughasoughaiuyfygh]

Ya'll are being kinda mean.

The way you humiliated me? All of you? YOU led me around on a LEASH!

"That was different. We thought you were inferior."

 

[High Fidelity]

And a lot of men are going MGTOW..

No surprise really..

Women are getting more and more open about being picky, yet they are also getting fatter and fatter.

166 pounds is obscene.

You think a woman weighing 166 pounds is obscene?

 

[ImAllLikeOkWaitWat]

You think a woman weighing 166 pounds is obscene?

A woman weighing 166 is at an increased risk for metabolic syndrome unless shes over 6'0. So not only is it unattractive but unhealthy as well. It is a number that definitely stands out.

 

[MehGuy]

You think a woman weighing 166 pounds is obscene?

Depends on the height..

Especially when we're talking about averages. And in a climate where women are getting more and more open about their disgust for shorter men.

 

[High Fidelity]

So not only is it unattractive but unhealthy as well

Unhealthy, perhaps. Unattractive... well that's subjective. I don't think it's very kind to be so broad-brushed.

Depends on the height..

Especially when we're talking about averages. And in a climate where women are getting more and more open about their disgust for shorter men.

Well it's interesting which is why I asked. Have you considered that, if anything, your experience as well as theirs to shorter men is just natural? We all have our preferences, so I don't think someone should be blamed because they prefer a taller partner, thinner, whatever, tons of subjective variables that appeal to the individual differently.

I think it's something worth considering because things like that are easy to dwell on when if we're honest with ourselves we probably do the same thing to others.

 

[MehGuy]

Unhealthy, perhaps. Unattractive... well that's subjective. I don't think it's very kind to be so broad-brushed.

About as subjective as shorter man being unattractive.

Well it's interesting which is why I asked. Have you considered that, if anything, your experience as well as theirs to shorter men is just natural? We all have our preferences, so I don't think someone should be blamed because they prefer a taller partner, thinner, whatever, tons of subjective variables that appeal to the individual differently.

I think it's something worth considering because things like that are easy to dwell on when if we're honest with ourselves we probably do the same thing to others.

That's the thing though. If I have my own personal preferences I'm just being a pig and I need to change. Yet women can just be as open and honest about what they want all day and they're just "empowered".

 

[MehGuy]

Watching Santa Clarita Diet on Netflix. Interesting thus far.

Do like how darker shows can be on Netflix compared to TV.

 

[High Fidelity]

That's the thing though. If I have my own personal preferences I'm just being a pig and I need to change. Yet women can just be as open and honest about what they want all day and they're just "empowered".

We both know that isn't always the case. I imagine the overwhelming majority, if not all, women here would disagree with that statement.

Most people have had negative experiences with people of the opposite gender being unfairly critical, unkind or lacking understanding of a person's feelings, insecurities or whatever. But to assume that's the majority of either men or women is wrong.

I agree that in certain circumstances things go too far, but I still do believe the majority of both men and women are reasonable enough to understand the subjectivity of attraction. That shouldn't, however, be misunderstood as someone being unreasonable if they find the fact you tell them you don't find them attractive because they're overweight to be upsetting. Subjective or not, it'd suck to hear that just as I'm sure it would suck to hear someone wouldn't want to date you because of your height, your hair colour, your skin colour, your job or career type, your level of education, all sorts... but that comes down to managing disagreements or parting ways amicably. You can part ways without giving a detailed run down on why you don't want to be with them or the things you find objectionable and if that's what happened to you then I'm sorry, that sucks, but not everyone is like that, not even close.

 

[MehGuy]

We both know that isn't always the case. I imagine the overwhelming majority, if not all, women here would disagree with that statement.

Most people have had negative experiences with people of the opposite gender being unfairly critical, unkind or lacking understanding of a person's feelings, insecurities or whatever. But to assume that's the majority of either men or women is wrong.

I agree that in certain circumstances things go too far, but I still do believe the majority of both men and women are reasonable enough to understand the subjectivity of attraction. That shouldn't, however, be misunderstood as someone being unreasonable if they find the fact you tell them you don't find them attractive because they're overweight to be upsetting. Subjective or not, it'd suck to hear that just as I'm sure it would suck to hear someone wouldn't want to date you because of your height, your hair colour, your skin colour, your job or career type, your level of education, all sorts... but that comes down to managing disagreements or parting ways amicably. You can part ways without giving a detailed run down on why you don't want to be with them or the things you find objectionable and if that's what happened to you then I'm sorry, that sucks, but not everyone is like that, not even close.

When it come to media, and feminism (the one who wants a monopoly on social justice and body image problems) it's the case.

Individual men in real life, probably not.

Although if I were famous I'd have to keep my mouth shut on preferences or risk a huge media campaign against me, while female actresses can tell the whole world how much they despise shorter men, and how superior taller men are. Once that happens Buzzfeed will make an article gushing about their bravery and how that female is empowered.

 

[kittysbecute]

I've noticed especially lately that you have been posting a lot about how women judge men based on their height, and you say that to be fair men should equally judge women for their weight and their age. I personally haven't seen any women on CF saying a man who is x height is "obscene". Even if that was the case, it's not really beneficial to dwell on so many negative judgements from people. Answering negativity with negativity doesn't help anyone.
It is better to be positive and lift each other up than to tear each other down.
It is more important to focus on how God sees us rather than how other random people see us. In the bible when Samuel was told to anoint the king of Israel he thought it was one of David's brothers because of his appearance: "But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”" -1 Samuel 16:7

 

[ImAllLikeOkWaitWat]

Although if I were famous I'd have to keep my mouth shut on preferences or risk a huge media campaign against me, while female actresses can tell the whole world how much they despise shorter men, and how superior taller men are. Once that happens Buzzfeed will make an article gushing about their bravery and how that female is empowered.

There is definitely a double standard here where a man is thought poorly of if he would say something like I would never date an obese woman. But women are given a pass on this issue and can say all of their preferences no matter how superficial and will definitely not be looked down upon. Men can't say they don't want a big woman because they are thought of as shallow, but if a woman says she wants a rich good looking tall man, she is glorified for it. I'm sure moms across the globe would be proud she has standards. But if a man has standards hes shallow, and superficial. Men don't have any rights when it comes to stating what they like but women are free to dehumanize and criticize men who don't meet their standard freely in society. Women in general are just given liberties like this that make equality impossible.

I mean just look at how post tenebras lux is defending women and another poster in this thread said we were being mean. Why is it when women have standards its not a problem but when men do its them being shallow superfical monsters? And lets be honest here men ask for much less from women than women ask from men. Women have a long list of things they need before giving a man even a chance. Men on the other hand want just someone who they can look at and someone they can get along with.

 

[High Fidelity]

When it come to media, and feminism (the one who wants a monopoly on social justice and body image problems) it's the case.

Not always, but yes there are some very vocal examples. I am not a fan of people like Sharon Osbourne. She was on a talk show I think I saw a clip of and yes that was pretty terrible and a definite double-standard at play, but not all women are like that, no where near, so that's why I take fault with the assumption that it's either a) one and the same across the board or b) even close to being like that with the majority of women.

Although if I were famous I'd have to keep my mouth shut on preferences or risk a huge media campaign against me, while female actresses can tell the whole world how much they despise shorter men, and how superior taller men are. Once that happens Buzzfeed will make an article gushing about their bravery and how that female is empowered.

Yes you're probably right to a certain extent, but that's just the media world. Controversy sells and until very recently in the grand scheme of things, the tables were turned.

I'm as against the extreme examples of feminism that take it way too far as you are, but to suggest it's systematic and symptomatic of all women is disingenuous.

 

[High Fidelity]

I mean just look at how post tenebras lux is defending women and another poster in this thread said we were being mean.

Because the moment we sink to the same level as those we condemn, who are we to even be annoyed, let alone try and take the moral high ground?

I've already stated I don't like a lot of what happens. I've already stated there are double standards at play in certain circumstances. What I haven't said, at all, is anything in defence of those extreme examples and characters that stoke the coals of this furnace. I'm merely disagreeing with the opinion that the majority of women are even close to that same level of distaste that even the majority of women would agree with you both on.

 

[MehGuy]

Not always, but yes there are some very vocal examples. I am not a fan of people like Sharon Osbourne. She was on a talk show I think I saw a clip of and yes that was pretty terrible and a definite double-standard at play, but not all women are like that, no where near, so that's why I take fault with the assumption that it's either a) one and the same across the board or b) even close to being like that with the majority of women.

What did Sharon Osbourne say? Lol.

Yes you're probably right to a certain extent, but that's just the media world. Controversy sells and until very recently in the grand scheme of things, the tables were turned.

The media seems to be getting worse and worse. The only tolerable media I can think of is aspects of new media. Which I do hope become bigger and stronger in the future.

I'm as against the extreme examples of feminism that take it way too far as you are, but to suggest it's systematic and symptomatic of all women is disingenuous.

Yeah, but then again I do feel hurt when almost no one stands up against it. Seems like there is silent approval at least.

 

[High Fidelity]

What did Sharon Osbourne say? Lol.

Something incredibly distasteful, violent and clearly illegal if acted upon. However the nature of it, if said by a man, would definitely have caused a lot more commotion(not that her saying it didn't, though).

It wasn't good at all and her co-hosts just sat cackling away.

But the distinction here is that the majority of women aren't like that at all.

It's just disappointing that we even need to have this conversation. Not a fan of 'white knights' and hate that I'm coming across as one myself probably, but the fact I find a lot of those same extreme people equally as distasteful as you do is insulting to the women I know who are nothing like that to be compared. That isn't right at all.

 

[MehGuy]

Something incredibly distasteful, violent and clearly illegal if acted upon. However the nature of it, if said by a man, would definitely have caused a lot more commotion(not that her saying it didn't, though).

It wasn't good at all and her co-hosts just sat cackling away.

But the distinction here is that the majority of women aren't like that at all.

It's just disappointing that we even need to have this conversation. Not a fan of 'white knights' and hate that I'm coming across as one myself probably, but the fact I find a lot of those same extreme people equally as distasteful as you do is insulting to the women I know who are nothing like that to be compared. That isn't right at all.

Oh, I think I know what you're talking about. That was one of the outrages from anti-feminists in the early days.

I don't think you're a white knight. Not sure if you're short though, if not I just don't know if you can understand my worries in this current climate is all.

 

[ImAllLikeOkWaitWat]

Because the moment we sink to the same level as those we condemn, who are we to even be annoyed, let alone try and take the moral high ground?

I am not condemning women for having standards, its good they do, but why am I not allowed that same privilege? Why are my wants and desires in women viewed negatively while if there were women in this thread saying they are only going to go with a man taller than them, flowing with money, and many other things of the sort, that they would get no backlash at all. But if I say I don't want to go with a women who weighs more than me I'm the one with the issue, but if a women says I'm not going with a so called loser, shes thought of as having standards and self respect. It's ridiculous.

 

[High Fidelity]

I am not condemning women for having standards, its good they do, but why am I not allowed that same privilege? Why are my wants and desires in women viewed negatively while if there were women in this thread saying they are only going to go with a man taller than them, flowing with money, and many other things of the sort, that they would get no backlash at all. But if I say I don't want to go with a women who weighs more than me I'm the one with the issue, but if a women says I'm not going with a so called loser, shes thought of as having standards and self respect. It's ridiculous.

Neither positions really need to be stated, though.

Want a thinner woman? Great, you know what to look for and that's a conversation you can have with someone you're interested in.

Want a wealthy man? Great, that's something they can look for and a conversation they can have with someone they're interested in.

Personally I couldn't care less about the two. If a woman didn't want to date me because of my bank balance then so what? I'm no going to try and beg someone to be with me that doesn't whether their reasons are 'good' or 'bad'. We can choose to let it consume us or we can just say whatever and move on. Sure it can be frustrating, but only if we allow it.

Ultimately it boils down to consideration. Someone stating they want someone taller can be deemed inconsiderate, sure, but so can stating wanting someone of or below a particular waist size, too. A lot of people post without thinking and while it may upset us, it doesn't necessarily mean it was posted with malicious intent.

For the record, though, I imagine broadly speaking both men and women would find it trashy and objectionable for someone to want to date someone because they're rich.

I don't think you're a white knight. Not sure if you're short though, if not I just don't know if you can understand my worries in this current climate is all.

Nope I'm 6'1 but rest assured my saddle bags have likely put off more women than your height

 

[ImAllLikeOkWaitWat]

Nope I'm 6'1 but rest assured my saddle bags have likely put off more women than your height

The thing is you can do something about your weight what is he suppose to do about his height?